During one of my classes, one of the children was sat in the little kindergarten plastic chairs.She suddenly opened her legs apart, leant her head down between them, and vomited all over the floor.I managed to get the attention of the assistant who just came over and started spreading it around with a mop.I got all the other kids to stand up and go to the back of the class with me and we did some singing and dancing while the mess was cleaned up.

Ruth text me to say that her usual English Corner was cancelled; instead the students had invited us to their Halloween party.I only usually go to the English Corner on a Wednesday as I'm just doing it as a favour.But I thought it could be fun to see the Chinese interpretation of Halloween.

I met Ruth at the school and at first we could not find the right classroom.Then some of her students I recognised approached us and took us upstairs.The classroom was full of students wearing home-made hats.They were supposed to be witches hats but looked more like Christmas hats as they had lots of tinsel glued on.The students wanted us to sit at the front of the class where everyone could see us and take photos of us.They put hats on our heads, but Ruth's did not stay on very well.Then candles were lit and stuck to the desk using melted wax.Not very safe!Two teachers were there, Alan and Linda.Linda had brought her young son.She said he goes to the Genius Baby and asked if I am his teacher.I sort of mumbled something non-committal like "ooh I teach lots of children there" and then changed the subject.How can I say I don't know because they all look similar to me!He had brought a carved pumpkin on a stick and was very pleased with it.

The lights went out and Alan asked Ruth to talk about Halloween.It soon became clear they were expecting a lesson rather than just the usual casual conversation of English Corner.I helped Ruth out by getting them all to recite the chant "Trick or treat, trick or treat, give me something nice to eat" which I remembered saying when I was a kid.Suddenly my table was full of sunflower seeds and sweets!I hadn't meant for them to take it literally.Linda and her little boy had to go home, but the lesson continued until quite late.It was not the party I had been expecting.Ruth told some ghost stories where she yelled at the end and made some of the girls jump which was funny.

I had a text message from Miss Wang "Headmaster want a teacher who take a baby to instead of the teacher who has lived with you. What is your opinon"So I replied and told her I am not happy about living with a baby and I will tell my agency in Beijing if this happens.She did not respond.Sometimes I would really like it if they could just leave me in peace!All I want to do is teach during my working hours and be able to relax in the evening, not worry about some random Chinese teachers turning up (with or without babies) to live here for who-knows how long?