love you my star

hey sweetie thanks for your messages i like them lots! well the last one was sad and makes me sad but the ones before are happy and nice! and i will keep you updated with those pictures so you dont forget what i look like! and i need your pictures soon because im breaking down and noname is having  a f***ing hard time already (literally) so dont worry about that, he is 1/3 through it now though so he is content- want to give eudi a big kiss! ow baby i cant imagine how hard it is being at home, it is just like if you had the money you would come and see me and you know i would do the same if i could especially now because i know you need me and i will still drop everything for you you know that! its so hard to hear what a hard time your having when im not there and i can do so little apart from this and the odd call, but i never stop thinking about you, if i was there at least i could chat to your mum or something but the way it is im just pretty defenseless like you are. Its so s***ty to hear what it has come down to, the patheticness of not paying for a flight to another location because of me, and all this crap about how bad i am for you. i just dont understand, i want to be your everything, i cant see the problem with us right now- i dont know who its affecting and why your mum and family think im such a bad guy. but also as much as it hurts, it also makes me so determined to be there for you and be your everything and never ever let you down and be everything you ever need in a man and in your life. and sooner or later your family will realise that that is all i want to be. Your handling everything so well darling. with your mum i know how hard it is but try not to lose your temper, however infuriating it is, just for now until your exams and stuff are over just walk away- i know its not you but it is for your sake darling. And dont ever forget how much support you have from your dad and obviously from me. You just have to be the bigger woman here and get your head down and do your exams baby, dont let this be another excuse. I know you can do it because i know your that type of girl. Baby i adore you, you mean the world to me- im topping up my phonecard for thailand and stuff so i will be there for you angel. just make sure yoyu get me those pictures. lol.

chin up my little star.

always here.

Arun

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

this day has sucked!!! i have hardly heard from u n i already felt lonely n pissed off at the beginning!!! i wish u were here n i cant stress that enough... it is so hard bein the one back home knowin that if u had enough money u could just hop on a plane n see the person that means more to u than anythin or anyone in the world!!! i really wish i could meet u somewhere n if i dont start workin soon it could be a while before i manage to get to LA cos my parents say they won't pay for my flight to philli cos i am goin to meet u from there n i am just usin them to get a ticket closer to u so it is cheaper for me!!! the only way they will pay is if i stay there for at least 3 months after u leave!!! x am upset baby!!! need a hug... it is hard cos everytime i was upset before i used to ring u n u would drop everythin to come to me but now it is so different!!! anyway will stop makin everyone unhappy now n end the message i guess... the last thing i wanna do is make u upset n make ur trip crap!! anyway im sure we will speak soon i just needed to tell u how im feelin cos we cant do it over texts xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

hey u!! its me again  x just come home after doing my chemistry exam and am feelin quite relieved cos i dont have anythin now for a week thank the lord!!! however this is gonna be a tricky week cos i am gonna miss u so so much!!! but on the plus side im gettin my hair done this afternoon n am goin out tomorrow night... yey!!! will get some pics n then post them thats if i can figure out how!!! haha u know what im like!!!! cant wait to speak to u in a few mins!!! haha or whenever u bother to call god!! hehe love u baby!!!!!!!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

i will put some on next week or at least try cos im a bit of a spaky u know that when it comes to computers!!! all i can say for two of those pics is wow... god i miss ur body!!! u look amazin!!! will take some for u! see how u like them!!! nonames gonna get frustrated!! haha x am feelin alot better now just knocked another 3 hard exams on the head n now am lookin forward to my break of a week after the exam tomorrow!!! yey!!! i love u baby n want to thanku for always thinkin of me n bein here for me even tho ur so far away!! u my baby boy!! i love u xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hey darling i hope your exams are going well, i hope you check this soon! i will put some photos up for you to look at, where are mine! i will let you off because your busy though! missing you sweetie! love you xxx

Hello baby! it was so lovely to hear your voice yesterday, its so nice when i can just have a proper convo with you, but it makes me miss you especially when we talk about silly things like we do! haha! i dont like this fact that i cant get sex even in your dreams, you will have to sort that one out for me- im not happy with that! haha . you must be studying hard at the moment for your history which i know your going to do very very very well in! so dont you worry about that, i will terext you before prob in a couple of hours but GOOD LUCK my sweetie. Thank you for your text last night and i know its hard right now having to do what your doing is tough, its hard when i had to do it too but like you said just look forward to the time when you have nothing over your head and you can just do what you want to do! it will be fantastic and then baby you will have a year off with me! which will be lovely, or at least we will get to spend alot of time together! im missing you baby! we will sort out your gap year promise! I love you sweetie. miss everything about you, especially your cute little bum. oops.

chat soon my little star. good luck. love you!

all i can think bout is u ringin me later n how nice it will be to hear ur voice n not have a delay n speak to u for a while!!! yey i love u sweetie x ps no more maths!!!! hahahaha xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

hey sweetie thanku so much for the message i appreciate it so much when i get one back cos i know ti is hard for u to get to the internet!!! promise me when u get back to dehli u will ring me n we can have a proper conversation!!!! cos i miss those especially with that massive delay which does my head in!!!! i wish u were here for my leavers ball too!!! would mean so much to me if u could be there but i will be thinkin of u all night dont worry!!! i hope that travellin is everythin that u imagined n we need to have a serious convo bout my gap year sometime too cos i need to sort it out n dont really wanna do it independent of u cos u are the biggest factor for me in it!!! cant wait to hear ur voice again!!! ur amazin n i love u with all my heart!!!" xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hey sweetie i found another internet place! thank you for your messages i like them lots. Your dreams suck, i always have really good dreams about you, like we are always together and in bed and stuff and they are much better! haha dont worry darling i wil never kiss another girl as long as i live because i will have you and you mean everything to me! so you are never going to have to worry about that! I really need to be with you too baby, its hard i know you revising and its mind blowingly boring but its just one of those things, i wish i could be there to help you or at least hold your hand but baby i never stop thinking about you so i am really. You must be excited about your leavers ball, especially becuase you have put so much work into it and stuff it will be a really good night, im sure- just makes me jelous that i cant be there with you on such an important night. i wish wish wish i could be there, if i could choose one thing to come back for it would be that. oh baby, its good that you will wear the ring, thank you- just dont forget me. Baby the other day when you were worried that i was insecure about us, i wasnt saying that at all i was joking that you couldnt get rid of me if you tried, i know you love me and like you said to have worked so hard to be together and to not be together now is just unfathomable. Im not busy when i text you darling, i take my phone with me so that i can be in contact with you, i though sometimes you were busy! and baby, text me when you go to bed- everytime i wake up in the night i check my phone hoping you text me-so remeber me when you go to bed!! well done with you last english darling thats really good news and i bet your first one isnt as bad as you think, you just gotta get through them now i spose, work hard and it will soon be finished then you wont be sitting around, you will be out and about- holidaying- partying and the likes so im sure it wont be as hard then. I do know what you mean about emptiness inside, i was up until 2.30 last night thinking about you- just sitting in this chair thinking about what your doing and it makes me miss you so much but i like it because i feel closer to you, and i just imagined watching you work, and kissing you for a good while! but everytime i think im not going to be with you for so long it makes my heart ache. espcially as this is going to be such a great part of you life and other people are going to be there and im not. But still the thought of seeing you again, lying with you, making love to you- is just incredible and keeps me going. I will be back in delhi hopefully by the 8th darling if not then the 9th so thats not too long away which should be cool. e-mail me some pictures or something. sorry if this has been a bit gushy baby, lol just been a tough period of time.

I love you darling more than anything, its wierd but i say it alot, dont just read over it as a sign off darling and i know people have said it before, but my angel i love you and will do anything for you.

your baby xxxx

hey i didnt know they blanked out ur swear words!!! hahaha thought u did it!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

it is just after my english exam n i thought i would come on to send u a little message cos u seem quite busy when im textin u plus it costs u alot of money to keep receivin my messages n then u feel compelled to reply so it costs u double!!! hehe x bein away from u has made me realise how much i need u here!!! i feel quite lost without u... n sounds corny i know but there is a kind of emptiness within me when ur not around!!! obviously i wish u could be here but i know ur havin a great time which makes me happy!!! my bad dream last night was u kissed another girl n i wasnt really bothered cos she worked at the place we were in so i didnt mind cos that was her job haha u did it in front of me 2!!! b****** haha x but like i say that didnt upset me... we were away on holiday n for some reason u were with ur mum n her friends n i was on my own!!! so we didnt get to spend much time together x but then this night in the club we got to be together for some time while ur mum n her friends did somethin else n u said u needed the toilet... n u never came back n i was lookin for u everywhere n was so disappointed that we didnt get that time together hehe stupid i know!!! oh n mr wilbur was there n lindsay harrison n she offered me a beer, n alien was there n mr root oh n alysia!!! n night fever was playin n i was on the dance floor on my own dancin cos u wernt there!!! hehe x strange i know but it upset me!!!  haha cute face!!! anyway get back to me as soon as u can sweetie!!! love you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx