I have not updated this blog in a long time. I am knocking out a bunch of things on my to-do list today and thought I would take a second to update this if for no other reason than just to take a break and do it for my own sake. Thanksgiving has me feeling a bit sentimental and looking back on different stages of my life and being amazed about the growth of myself as a man, as a friend, as a person in general. I have largely felt that I learned everything the hard way, on my own, with no real guidance. I don't say that proudly but more with a sense of mourning for the lack of family life I always wanted and never had, and the mistakes I made which at times cost me friends I valued. Although I was never a bad man just more of an ignorant teenager and young adult. Now I am 27 still not an old wise monk or anything but light years ahead of where the 22 year old me was. I don't smoke, rarely drink, and am trying hard to speak less and listen more. It is quite possible that my passion for things still gets the best of me at times and I do get impatient. I am too young to stop learning, too old to not learn from mistakes, and to naive to believe I should stop chasing my idea of a dream.
I have never stopped dreaming for a better life then I saw, then I had, then I created for myself. There is a dream I believe for all of us some with more clear visions then others. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up and I'm starting to think maybe I am in love with "new." I like adventure and change and am really sad I haven't done anything adventurous for a while. Yesterday I sold everything I had and drove to Chicago and today I am managing an Anytime Fitness in the suburbs. Still looking for what's next. I enrolled in college to pursue another degree which I now have one semester knocked out. In one year I will have 3 degrees. Maybe next I will be in a place and situation where I can slowly pursue a master's degree. I hope to get to a place where I can explore the landscape and be able to tell myself that I am leaving the earth in a better place than when I found it. My purpose is to have a purpose for a lack of better words. Maybe someday I will learn a foreign language and work with the UN as a peace keeping official or public affairs specialist. Maybe I'll be a fireman and rush into burning buildings; maybe I'll own my own gym and find ways to be philanthropic through that. Maybe in 60 years I'll look back and say I did everything right by doing it wrong. That is why I take risk, take on challenges and try new things. I'm not jumping out of a plane anytime soon but I'm not buying a Cadillac and picking out coffins either. To my old friends I don't talk too much anymore I hope things are great for you!