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Being on the road is great but hard work. You see good sight, bad sights, meet friendly people and people who are probably friendly, but with whom you do not get along, you smile,you cry, it's sunny, it rains... life goes up and down at home, and that does not change just because you leave - it's just easier to focus on the 'ups' when you move all the time.
When I arrived in Adelaide I was fed up with sights and traveling. No more trees, museums, beaches, just a home and routine. I felt bad about feeling that way and thought "s***, I've wasted over a month doing nothing!". Later I found that it had been neassesary to reload, and I might not have seen 1000 sights, but I got some fun moments with locals (friends) and saw how the normal life is. I realized that there is only a scertain amount of info and impressions you brain can take in at once. Even I, who loves new things, have an urge to do the same over and over - routine. And after routine, you're ready to break routines again!
Having to admit that I needed a break also forced me to think... and I tell you, that can be dangerous when you've got to much time! My travels give me an idea about how the world works, it's cultures and differences, but also reminds me about the word "home". Where is home? Can I move from home for school? Or will home move with me? And yes, I get homesick! I Adelaide it hit me, hard! Not "I want to go home", but how much home/family/friends mean to me! Seeing my Adelaide friends have their lives with family, jobs, school, friends who know them etc. made me miss mine. And then internet and MSN doesn't help! 'Cause even if it is great to talk to Kristian and Simon and Marie it's somehow easier not to...
Traveling along and at the same time being single is tough! Being by myself is fun, I meet people and have to be open. But seeing the couples in the hostel kitchen, or the three girls who know eachother from highschool, who can giggle over the smallest things, reminds you how nice it is, not having to tell your story everytime you meet someone, and that, had I been with someone, my food expences would have been half af much!
I talked to Kristian one day, and was already moody, and I cried in the end. Then I went outside with a glass of good wine and looked at the starts with the smell of gumtree in the air... and started smiling... There I was, alone, far away from home, being the most spoiled girl ever. I then realized that the longing for home wouldn't go away and that it was actually just a reminder, how lucky I am, to know that I've got people who will stand ready with a hug when I decide to go back. And my being able to go around the world, and grow, is only possible because of my home supporting me... I've chosen to be along because I deep down know, that I can choose otherwise...
I can't wait to go home, and I'm not ready yet. can't wait to make my own world at home, including all the things/impressions I've found on my journey, and I still want to include more...
Life is great... tough, long, but great - no matter where I am - and I'm not really alone, there are six mia. other people surrounding me, helping me create life.... Carpe Diem!!!!
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