So i was up and about and exploring LA.

On the way i popped into Nordstomes to buy some new makeup and i swear i came out of their looking like a clown! You should have seen the state of me. I had massive lips and really big dark brown eyes which looked like they were popping out of my head. I swear i wouldn't ever go out looking like that and as soon as i walked out of the shop i went into another shop to get a tissue to wipe it all off. The girl in that shop said i should have left it on...so god knows what she'd taken today to make it look so rosy!

So today that is all i have done, which sounds boring, except for the totally "Special" people i have met on my travels. I walked down this main road and met one man with a shopping trolley and two dogs. It would appear that he lives out of his shopping trolley but within his shopping trolley he has a ghetto blaster which has had a special boom box added to increase the volume and he's blasting out classical music...How ace is that! Someone more special than me.

In the diner this morning i was sat across from Freddie mercury who donned a white leather stooded outfit with a porn star tash!

Whilst walking down the road i saw a lady in a sport car with the roof down sat next to a skeleton...priceless

And its now early afternoon and Elvis is sat next to me on the computer...I'll tell you this beats Phones 4u anytime!!!

So as you can see i've settled in very well and will keep you up to to date on my antics tonight which i'm very excited about! This town is full of famous people and i can't wait until Robbie walk up to me and declares his undying love to me but you will have to wait another day for that story!

Tonight we went out star spotting whilst attempting to try and find something to eat. Marie-Anne suggested we ate at an organic cafe which lots of famous people frequent. The cafe was very posh and the signs said that the food contained no refined sugars, preservatives, pesticides, red meat or poultry so god knows what i was letting myself in for! I took at look at other peoples plates and to be honest it all looked colourful and funky (i notice they didn't say contains no food colourings!) I decided to play it safe and ordered a salami panini with beans, tofu, caramelised onions and a side order of veg in balsamic sauce. It took minutes to arrive and looked ok on the plate but Jesus Christ did it taste BAD!

What was i thinking of? As if my body after 30 years of pesticides and preservatives, which taste perfectly ok to me, would like to be introduced to greasy mush that they claim is organic crap! The Salami should have carried a health warning because it tasted like it had come out of someones arse and the veg was that greasy i would have had more pleasure drinking a bottle of cod liver oil!

If this is really what the stars eat no wonder they are all stick thin because that crap went through me like a dose of the salts and i bet that would've tasted much better too!!!

It was now time to go to the Comedy Club to give out the cookies and condoms!!!

Now i've done some strange things in my time but i've never given out condoms and cookies together in one night! Everyone thought it was crazy and i thrived on all the attention and loved it. Diane Keaton and Dreamy something or other from Grays Anatomy were in their too but i wasn't that impressed because i hadn't got a clue who they were.

I had an amazing evening and didn't have one drink because i'm off drink and don't think i'll ever be able to drink again...

......and that was the end of day two and if this is the start of things to come i'm never coming home i love it here x