Welcome to my first blog in my bout with South America!

Thankfully my talent as a chatterbox came in handy almost as soon as I boarded the plane to Rio. The tv´s on the plane weren´t working so i decided that the only way to survive the 11 hour flight was to natter to the Swiss guy next to me. By the time, we arrived in Rio he had already befriended my monkey and donated a Lindt chocolate bar to my travels. So it all got off to a good start!

First stop Rio de Janeiro......
After suffering a foghorn snorer in my mixed dorm I slept walked to breakfast(aka ham and cheese) and found Fiyin - a girl I went to school and university with!!!! I couldn´t believe my luck! We bummed about on the most phenomenal beaches together for a couple of days. I have never witnessed women with such amazing figures in the most tiny bikinis ever created (must be by men). That isn´t just on the beach either. Everywhere from the local supermarket to walking down the street, people here are always almost naked. They also happen to be pretty talented volleyball players and we managed to crash a volleyball tournament on Copacabana beach. THey had a DJ on decks and most people had a can of beer at their disposal. If i am honest it made my PE GCSE attempt look rather feeble (i dont quite have the non wobbly look down either unfortunately!).

I have been drinking my fair share of caiprinhas (still can´t spell it though, perhaps because i have had too many) at the most amazing clubs. We went to one in a favela with around 3000+ Brazillians and it was a sweaty funk heaven! Absolutely rammed and the dancing was crazy. When the place had begun emptying around 5am a group of guys in full backwards caps attire suddenly began a new kids on the block dance routine.

Everywhere round Rio you can find stunning graffiti particularly in the favelas. Check out the pictures in the gallery on the website. Obviously I did the usual Rio tourist attractions like good old Christ the Redeemer - spot the monkey and also sugar loaf but to be honest Rio is so buzzing that you can do nothing much at all and be rather content.

The food varies from amazing to minging! Fiyin and I found this random restaurant right in the middle of the santa teresa district which had the most amazing brazilian food which included crab on banana - now I admit it was a leap of faith but it was actually gorgeous. They also eat a lot of manioc which is a kind of yellow powder that they put on everything. Bizarre texture adding stuff, that has the potential to suck all the moisture out of your mouth but is still oddly satisfying.

We have just arrived in a district called Bahia which is on the North East coast and is absolutely stunning! The beaches are unspoilt and the music and partying is constant. On our way to our first beach of the day we passed through this tiny town which looked like a CArribbean version of the wild west - colourful buildings and saloon like bars with donkeys parked up outside!

My tour leader is Venezualan guy called Terry and he used to be a guide at Angel Falls. His cv includes guiding the King of Spain, Fidel Castro, Madonna (who apparently looks very good for her age in her bikini - who would have thought!) and Harrison Ford!!! I have decided that with this wealth of experience with handling VIP´s that he may be sufficiently qualified to take me down the Amazon.

This morning we were up at 7am to go to the yearly carnival/religious festival. It was absolute carnage. FIrecrackers going off, drummers, samba dancers, people dressed up as monsters, Chaplin and santa, drinking beer, eating sugar cane, it was just the most crazy, fun and knackering experience of my life! The whole 4km parade revolves around this women dressed in these huge white meringues (they look a little bit like those dolls old ladies put over thier toilet roll). They samba the whole way, carrying a vase of follows and a bottle of water. They are supposed to wash the steps of the local church and then place flowers on the altar. I haven´t worked out why yet so i will have to get back to you on that one! It took loads of videos so have a peek and see if you can get the gist of what i was talking about. A lovely little old geezer took it open himself and his insanely fast feet to give me a crash course in samba. I think I could of done myself more justice if i had more than one beer but he gave me two thumbs up and a toothless grin so either he was mocking me or giving me an A. I would prefer to go with the second option.


Love you all

xxxxxxxxxxx


PS

After being told what seems like a million times to `be safe´ I have to say that i think it really isnt that dodgy here at all. The Brazilian´s I have come across so far have been so friendly that i rarely worry about getting mugged at all!