Profile
Blog
Photos
Videos
The Simple Life
Week Two - The rest of the week was spent chilling and wandering about our area and the city. We joined a gym - yes we did say GYM!!!!! and that was about it!
Friday evening loomed but with no jobs yet lined up for the following week we decided to have a few drinks in the flat. This was all to change however with the unexpected call from Tommy. As you can imagine he had to twist our arms to make us venture out - we would've much rather stayed in watching American Idol...... So without further ado we slapped on the slap and adorned the heels and skipped off into the City. Woo hoo!
We were meeting Tommy by the train station. Oor Lynnith was a tad nervous and it was all a bit surreal when he appeared and we all just sort of stood in a circle smiling at each other. This tension was soon eased by a few vodkas in 3 Below, a cool little bar in the city (very similar to Market Place). We had intended to only have a few drinks as we always do BUT the conversation was flowing, Lynne was finding Thomas very cute and so when he suggested heading to Seven, the club where Liam works, wild horses couldn't have stopped us.
Mr Thomas Henry Sumthing Dohrman came up with a little plan to surprise Liam! Liam was blissfully unaware that we were meeting Tommy that night. Tommy wandered into the bar, Liam appeared to serve him then we strolled up either side of Tommy. If only we'd had a camera for his look of horror / delight (we're still unsure!). He was like a whippet out the traps getting to the other side of the bar and we had to be served by someone else.
Seven was pretty quiet so we headed to The White Bar where Tommy used to work. This was another funky bar in St Kilda and the fact we were being served free drinks made it even better. Getting more and more pissed by the minute Tommy then remarked "you's girls are exactly as I remember!" What could he have meant?!?! Well and truly on our way we headed back to Seven and unfortunately we do remember our behaviour!!!!!!!!! Twirling each other on the dancefloor and annoying Liam at the bar are just a couple of the memories we'd like to erase. Make the images of the twirling stop........ Lynne met some of Tommy's mates but she can't really remember their names, what she said to them, or even what they looked like!
Lyndsay was twirling herself at this point when in steps 22 year old dancer boy Daniel. When he found out Lyndsay was 28 and commented "you're well hot for an older woman" the flirtation was killed stone dead and the twirling of herself was resumed.
Whilst Lynne was in predator mode at the bar with poor / lucky Thomas, Lyndsay was making some more friends. She met a cool girl called Georgie who was impressed by all the twirls.......
We finally made it home in a drunken stupor about 4am. Lyndsay was due at the gym for her induction only 4 hours later!!!!!!!!! As it was clearly all Lynne's fault that she couldn't function enough to make the gym she made Lynne phone and cancel. An easy task you may think but delirious with drink and lack of sleep Lynne called the Hire Car Shop not once but twice to cancel Lyndsay's induction. Bloody wrong numbers. Caused much hilarity though.
Saturday was a write off and you will be surprised to hear we even stayed in and made it to the gym for 9:30am on a Sunday morning (please don't tell anybody our reputations will be in tatters).
Lyndsay spent the next few days in bed with a throat infection while Lynne picked up some work as a Receptionist with a marketing & wholesale company. Funds being extremely low we done jack s*** all week.
Week Three - Having pages of bar listings we decided to have a few drinks in the city on the Friday evening. We wandered about like a couple of shareens until we gave in and hopped in a cab and gave him the address of a venue. We stumbled upon a funky bar called Stelar and we settled next to the DJ with a couple of voddies. Beep Beep went the phone, Tommy txt'd to say he was in 3 Below with some of his mates after being at the footy. Deciding it would be rude not to, we headed to meet them for a few. They were all a bit more inebriated than us though! And as much as we tried we just couldn't catch up. About 1am Macca's was calling so the 3 of us escaped for some junk food. Lynnith ventured to Tommy's and Lynz headed home. She never got the breakfast in bed as promised on the website message board though!!!!!!!!
Feeling a bit ropey on the Saturday Lyndsay headed to the gym alone and then we both got our hair cut in the afternoon. Planning to go out for just a few drinks in St Kilda didn't go to plan! We hit a few bars on Fitzroy Street and decided to try the White Bar again as we'd enjoyed it. Imagine our surprise when we spotted Liam behind the bar. We had no idea he also worked in there! Lynne's promises of stalking him the week before seemed to be coming true. But bless him he was kind to us on the drinks front. Completely smashed but in the mood to party Georgie's txt to say she was in The Prince of Wales was welcomed. You had to practically scrape us off the ceiling when we walked into that club. Tunes pumping, crowd rocking, ah this was more like it, this was what we'd been missing. By 6am we still hadn't had enough so found ourselves in the queue for the afterclub 161. We waited half an hour but it was totally worth it. This was one of the coolest venues we've ever been to with a world class DJ. The set he played is one we'd love to hear again and again and again. He was throwing in random 80's numbers like Blondie Heart of Glass and "Don't you want me baby....." Our poor wee legs gave in about 9:30am and we stumbled into daylight, a taxi and then bed.
Needless to say we didn't make it out of bed on the Sunday, well other than to stagger to Nando's (restaurant) like a couple of down and outs. Good job nobody knows us in Melbourne!
Week Four - Another week of work for Lynne and another week of boredom for Lyndsay was broken up by a little mid week soiree. The prospect of facing another night in the ice box (oor flat) was too much to take so we decided to sample one of the local bars / eateries. Imagine our delight when we discovered they sold oor fave wine Pinot Grigio. Clearly we had to have a bottle or ten. Being fat horses we also stuffed ourselves with some gorgeous nibbles (but going to the gym now means we can eat what we want, right?) We had a brilliant night, some great laughs, dances, sing-songs and general silliness. It was like the good old days. Especially when Lynne had to get up for work still drunk the next morning. Oh memories........
Rather than suffering the day out though she lasted a few hours before pulling a sickie and heading back to bed for a few hours. There was nothing else for it but to hit the shops, we find retail therapy cures hangovers. Mr Visa and Mr Mastercard may beg to differ!
Lyndsay was picking up the odd days work here and there and had work lined up for the Friday. All week we'd been looking forward to Friday as it warranted the arrival of The Big Man Jamester! Jamie is one of Kirsty and Lyndsay's friends from Glasgow. He's been in Sydney for months and was coming for a wee holiday to see us. Having not heard from him since a drunken call on the Wednesday night we still headed to the bus depot at 8am on Friday to pick him up. The arse never got off the bus and a much frantic day was spent at work trying to contact him, panicking about what had happened and creating scenarios in our heads. The radge got in touch about 6:30pm that night a little sheepish to explain he'd been too burst to get on the bus and had lost his phone. Typical Glasgow gadgie! His imminent arrival was now due on Saturday morning.
That evening we had been guestlisted for the bar we had been in on the Wednesday. They were having an 80's night so we thought we'd head down there for a few. After our much deserved / needed shopping spree we were like excited school children getting ready to go out to showcase our new gear. We catwalked the whole way down to the bar thinking we were all that only to discover that 80's night was code for gay night!!!!! Yip good one girls....... Never mind the tribute band were brullianT and we danced our asses off. Maro would have luv'd the outfits and dancing (the band not us). Although we did look fabulous darling. Click, click, click went the paparazzi......... stop darling stop........ Don't Ask - drunken text messages with Maro is all we'll say!
Absolutely dying and going to kick Jamie's ass Lyndsay found herself yet again at the bus station but all was forgiven when his wee jakey pus appeared off the bus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The fact he had a sound system for the bedroom made it all the better. We ventured out in the afternoon for a few bottles of wine (I know so not like us) and some lunch. Very good to have a reminder of home with us much funny banter as Billy Connelly. A catnap later and we were all frantically getting ready for another big Saturday night out.
We headed to the Cushion Lounge and then the White Bar for a few drinks. Jamie almost got us hammered when the bird he'd been txting all night turned up in the bar and he left with us only 5 minutes later. She wiz nae impressed! Well, Seven was calling us what can we say!!!! A girl from Lynne's work had us guestlisted that night. It was a good enough night but as a venue and crowd it doesn't match the other clubs we've been to in Melbourne. We did attempt 161 again but it was not to be, it was too busy the queue was wrapped round the block. So, back to Seven it was......... We still ended up well and truly burst and a good night was had by all. Home by a very respectable 7am on Sunday morning!
We shouldn't have been seen in public on Sunday let alone venture to Safeway to buy munchies! The day was spent in bed eating and watching Billy Connelly and Peter Kay DVD's. Sunday's dinnae get any better.
Week Five - Deciding we should see a bit more of Melbourne than bars and clubs and take some photos we found ourselves in the Rialto Tower for sunset on the Wednesday. The tallest office building in the Southern Hemisphere, great views but no hilarious glass lift story like Thailand. Jamie's a bad influence he made us drink a bottle of wine whilst we were there!! We then headed to 3 Below for a cheeky swally and then on to Chinatown for some scran (you may notice that we are getting more Scottish - this is also the Jamesters influence). Had a superb meal with more wine all for a fiver each! BrullianT. As if us posing beside the mens underwear mannequins in Myers shop front wasn't enough hilarity the tram ride home was carnage. The poor, poor woman who was sandwiched in with the 3 of us will never quite be the same again. Jamie was making home movies on his camerie and we were all talking s***e and couldnae breathe for laughing. You know the typical scots abroad type behaviour! Jamie shouldn't really have tried to chat her up though..........
Thursday Jamie spent the day in bed while we headed out for more photo opportunities. Got some cracking shots of the city, walked for miles and found ourselves back in St Kilda hunting down wine on Ackland Street. Does anyone else think we have alcoholic tendancies?! Nah, neither do we. Jist like oor faithers KWAS min KWAS....... You know what we've decided "there are a lot better things in life than alcohol, but alcohol makes not having them all the easier"
We were both working yesterday (Friday) and therefore planned a very civilised evening in with dinner and a few drinks. This soon turned into absolute mayhem as most things do when The Big Man's around. Again more Scottish banter had us fighting for breath between giggles. You don't realise how bizarre and funny the Scottish language and patter is until you haven't heard it for so long.
So finally today, after yet another session at the gym, we made it to the internet cafe. It's the FA Cup Final day so we're going to a bar at midnight to watch the game live. Sticking with the British theme we're heading to an irish bar on the Southbank first and if the 2 of us cannae get chatted up with the blarney boys or the footy boys then we're goan haim in disgust........
Ciao x
P.S Tommy has disappeared off the face of the earth. We don't know what Lynnith could have done to upset the poor boy........!!
- comments