Good Day Boss, I didn't realise this was a dating site now!!!!

By the way all our canes are split and the whips are a looking a little wilty not to mention the handcuffs have become un-fluffed!!!! Is it ok to order new ones???????

Looks much fun is being had excellent!!!

Don't do anything we wouldn't

Love

The Hydrosub Girls

WiFi ??? I was told about that in a hotel in Brazil........I thought the manager was offering me his missus !!!

Dear Paulie,Well, we've both said our apologies but I'll have you know that your b******ing has set me back years. You know how sensitive I am. All of those hours of therapy, during which, I managed to accept my selfishness and put myself back on the road to normality and to wallow in the milk of human kindness, have been for nought.Please be advised that I have signed myself up to another, 2 year, course of therapy which, I am led to believe, will remove that streak of selfishness from my character. The course is entitled "Mummy Is Always Right".Have a nice day and I hope that your next s***e is a porcupine and you fall back on it. Your friend - Ian

Paul. I have now finished reading all of your message board and fully understand why you are upset by these so called friends who clearly don't give a Shihtzu for your feelings. I also understand why you have now apparently moved to Australia. I can reassure you that some of my best friends are gay Hungarian arms dealers and only one of them is called Paulie. I will keep reading your blogs with interest and no ulterior motive.

PS Any word from the Hydro sub-girls yet.

Yes I am still about. Sulking but still in good spirits. You 2 should get a room. Preferably with wi fi so you can let me know what goes on as it happens. Oh in case you're interested I'm off camping ( I know Ian ) for a few days but before I go I'm posting my latest blog about Ayers Rock and Alice. That is if you're interested at all.

Sorry too (female version -so it doesn't really count). Are you still here Paulie??

Sorry

I would just like to remind all and sundry that this blog is about me me me! Have you all forgotten that. Blimey, I might as well go home.

I will pass on private e mail but only, as is my nature, if I get 10% of whatever you do.....and thereafter occasionally glance at my Grand Tour and make me too, feel wanted

Dear Ms. Bean, Well, what can I say? The inflatable suggestion has certainly got me wondering. There was a time when my perfect woman was a big, dark, blonde, clean shaven with a moustache and with a case of beer under her arm. I did down grade the criteria, some years ago, when I removed the specific conditions of her being three foot tall and with a flat head, the limp and corduroy tights were optional.Now………….. the inflatable comment has knocked all of the above in to a cocked hat. Particularly since you wouldn't mind me bringing along me Hovawart. I had a Ariegeois, once, but it was repossessed when I fell behind on my window cleaner payments. Have you ever wondered…………Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly bits and drink what comes out"? Mr. Bahn x Oh, yeah, almost forgot......How ya doing, Paul, well I hope.

Mr Bahn - Naturally, Hovawarts acceptable but would obviously need to be waterproof and inflatable would be good. Isn't it good to cut out the middle man, i.e. reynolds? x

Hi Paul. I have taken your advice and started reading your blog too. I notice your friend Ian has had a touch of the Gulags recently as well (unpleasant at the time but curable these days). As you appear to offer a match-making service at reasonable rates could you please put me in touch with the Hydrosub girls. I have an image which involves, fluffy handcuffs, whips, canes and a large quantity of water. If I am wrong don't tell me as that thought got me through a particularly difficult day today at the office.

Your trip looks fun and the photos good but I am hampered in further comments as I do not know you and we have never met. However, your three offspring have often served me real ale at the border with sad pitying eyes and sometimes charged the same amount for a pint so I do feel almost part of the family. I wasn't going to add a comment but the arithmetic was 1 + 1 and I thought I better take my chance.

Ms. Bean..........Only if there is room enough for my Hovawart. X