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Well, I’m back ‘home’ now after the holiday of a life time with the tremendous Tiger 4 and my big sis. We managed to squeeze a hell of a lot into 16 days, going North to South, with a lil stop in the middle on the way. Can’t say I wasn’t a little anxious about returning to work as there was a lot of stress going on before I left, but things seem to have calmed down a bit and I’m happy to be back now.
Before I continue, I’ll give out my new address now so that those that don’t wish to trawl through this monster blog can still send me pretty things:
A9 Balawanat Nagar,
Ghandi Road
Gwalior
Madhya Pradesh
474002
India
That said…
We started off in Delhi where I met the Tiger 4 at the airport. Reaching an hour early, much to the delight of my friend who had come with me to pick them up, only served to build my anticipation to see them and so when they emerged through the arrivals gate, bright orange t-shirts a-blazing, I ran at them with such force that I nearly rugby-tackled Libby to the ground. Of course it wasn’t expertly done (its been 7 months!) and I just knocked her sun glasses off her head and attracted a lot of judgmental glares, so tried to regain my composure quickly.
After having Pizza hut for dinner on our first night (I think they’ve just about forgiven me for that one now) I went to meet Rach the next morning, which was a tearful reunion (on my part). ‘Let me look at you’ she said, big sisterly and caring … ‘you’re not very brown’. Cheers sis!
We then headed out as a group to take in the sites of Delhi, getting the main ones in as we only had one day. I’m such a rubbish traveler, I can’t remember exactly the names of the places we visited but I remember a big mosque, where Rachel, Jen and Chloe had to wear attractive bright over coats to cover their knees – shame on them – oh and the Red fort (ace), Ghandi ji’s memorial site and a pop to Cannaught place for a spot of shopping and dinner.
Tthat night I had to nip to Bhopal (a good 10 hours on the train) to attend a meeting for work the next day, but was reunited with the gang in Agra the following day. I got in a about 5.45am after an overnight train and we headed straight to the Taj for 6am to attempt to see the sun rise. Failed. It had already risen by the time the gates were opened but it didn’t detract from the experience. Obviously, you have to see the Taj if you’re in India, rar rar rar, and I wasn’t overly expecting much, other than to tick the box, but my Jonny, it is such an incredible experience, and I was happy to be charged foreigner rate to get in. Its not just the building, which is beautiful, don’t get me wrong, it’s the whole ambience of the place. You can smell the millions of flowers from the beautiful gardens – rather than the over indulged incense sticks of the tourist markets, all the noisy traffic and rubbish that plagues India’s streets is trapped outside, and at that time the breeze was cool and the sun was low. We happily wondered around, after being dragged to all the best photo places by some India tourist guide – I was happy to indulge Rachel’s zeal for photography since I may now take pleasure in the pictures . We spent a good few hours taking it all in, until about 8.30am when we started to feel the sun on our shoulders. That day, we hired a driver to take us to the best spots of Agra, so got to see the fort, and some other places (again forgot the name – ask the others, they’re better than me at these things), and were then taken to the compulsory tourist shops, owned by the drivers friends. In the evening we took a boat trip across the river behind the Taj, to see the sun set behind it (beautiful) and on the way back were invited to partake in Puja with our boat owner in the local police station, or army barracks. Rach and I joined in and tried to remain cool despite seeing the rats running around, and under the shrine. Dinner that evening was enjoyed on a roof top restaurant overlooking the Taj, after a lil bit of harmless flirting with the local shop keepers – not that it helped much in my bargaining skills, which I’ve realized are shamlessly poor – and force feeding small street children to drink way too much milk than is good for them – Rach has got a kind heart, bless her.
Then off to Gwalior it was to visit my neck of the woods. After a brief stop at my place to meet my landlord auntie and her family and a few friends, the girls donned the Salwar Kameez’s I’d had made for them and we went directly to Jhansi to be met by the (now) infamous Rahees and be taken to my village, Saiwara. On reaching, we enjoyed a lovely dinner on the roof top made by my bhabis (brother’s wife), which me being grateful for declaring myself a vegetarian on arrival and being able to avoid the chicken that was served – I think someone got the wind pipe in their bowl!
Despite my efforts to remember just what a culture shock it was to me when I first arrived, and therefore being able to warn my comrades, I think the whole outside toilet (when suffering from diarrhea), lack of electricity and being placed centre stage and stared at, was a little discomforting for my guests, but all was enjoyed (I hope). Well I enjoyed being told in the morning how Crookey was pretty much tucked into bed and then stared at for a while, before the gentlemen in question decided to b***** off and go to bed themselves.
We did a lil horseriding in the morning and went on a bit of a tour of my village to meet my extended family (quite literally) and stopped off at the primary school on the way, where Chloe distributed pens and skipping ropes. I was also accused of mothering Kerr’s love child (despite the child in question being 6 years old) and stashing her away in this village for no-one to know about. Poor thing, its not like they can afford adequate eye-care out here ha ha!
Next we headed to Nowgong to meet my old work chums and my best Indian friend, Shipra. We were swiftly taken to a private swimming pool – it pays to know the people I know – and enjoyed a cool down, swimming in our clothes of course. On the way back from the pool, we stopped off at the picnic spot I’ve eternalized and took in the sites of this incredible, untouched (by tourist boards) landscape. We got back to Nowgong and had another little dinner party at Shipra’s place – yum yum – played around with the kids from downstairs and met with some other old friends of mine. I don’t think Rach or the Tiger 4 were overly impressed that I’d taught Shipra’s husband ‘real’ English such as ‘ficking awesome’ and ‘ace’, but I think it’s the type of language he’ll need to survive if ever visiting our country. The next day we went on another little tour of people I was obliged to meet and were force fed more food and chai, not that it was unpleasant of course. On our way back to Jhansi, we stopped off in Bangra, Rahees’ political hub (its very small) where the infamous eye-sexing took place during a discussion of political policies, education drives, and damn building.
Finally, we dragged the two love birds apart and headed to Jhansi, where we met my old flat mate Richa who lead the way to the best saree shops of the city. I think the poor shop boys were a little overwhelmed by the intrustion of the English shopping approach, i.e. just let me have a look myself, but managed to show off some of the fabric themselves also. Miraculously we left with everyone happy at having found what they wanted.
And here is where we split, the Tiger 4 heading to their namesake destination and me and Rachel catching a train down to Aurangabad, Maharastra.
In Aurangabad, Rach had booked a very posh hotel for us to stay, much to my delight, and we enjoyed a big pool, massages, very nice continental food, and cocktails. There we went to see the Ellora caves, into which huge temples were carved hundreds of years ago. Its quite an architectural achievement, and absolutely stunning. We also went to Dautalabad fort which was my favourite fort (of the many we saw) because I walked all the way to the top – quite a way – and enjoyed a beautiful view of the surrounding area. I also made friends with some farmers on the way up, who were loving my Hindi, and said that if I’m strong enough to climb all the way to the top, then I’m welcome to come and work on their farms. Must remember to tell Rahees that – he always says I’m too pansy to make a good farmer.
We spent three days in Aurangabad and, maybe foolishly, made quite good friends with our tempo driver who did a good job of showing us around. However, he then rang me 15 times in one day once we’d left, so maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to go making friends.
We then met up with the rest of the gang in the most beautiful part of India (not that I’ve seen it all) – Goa. Hare Ram, on the drive to our beach hut in the south from the airport in the north, I couldn’t take my eyes away from the window. Even though we at the beginning of the hot season, and there hasn’t been rains for a while, there was still a million and one shades of green flooding the hills and plains rolling away from the road side. Greens that were made brighter by the contrast with the burnt orange soil, that shone throughout the whole landscape. We thrn got to the beach and found ourselves on a virtually deserted stretch of white sand onto which waves were violently crashing. I think this was probably the best part of the holiday for me since it was just so relaxing which is just what I needed. The highlights included, besides lots of sea fun, a nice river boat trip to a ‘lagoon’ which in all honesty wasn’t that lagoony but we were given a fruit to eat that the Goans make alcohol out of. Despite having the texture of soiled underpants, it didn’t taste too bad. We also went fishing in the sea, despite my initial objection on the basis that tourist fishing is one of the largest threats to the small scale fishing industry – I was awake in most of the fisheries lectures! However, I was assured we’d throw back anything we didn’t want to eat, and then I figured, we’ll eat fish anyway so why not catch it ourselves. Anyway, we weren’t overly successful – Rachel caught a fish which, when she was served it in the evening, did not taste good – although we did see dolphins, and I managed to de-eye something somehow! We also bought a lobster from the beach front which Chloe happily tucked into later. I met a very pretty boy who was lovingly referred to as Cashew nut since Rachel couldn’t seem to get her head round saying Kishor – and no he didn’t sound that much like Micheal Jackson, well not when we were talking in Hindi anyway. Anyhoo, with me on the back of his mate’s motorbike, and the rest of us on rented scooters we made our way to a nearby busier beach to play a bit of pool and buy a few tit-bits. And we couldn’t have asked for a better way to finish our visit to paradise. Chloe and I were sleeping on the beach and were awoken by our bar boys walking past us with some guests. ‘Kya hua?’ I asked (what’s going on?), and was told that one of the leather back turtle nests had hatched and the baby turtles were ready to be helped into the sea. So we ran down to the fenced off area (to keep them safe from the dogs) and watched as they were put into a bucket of water. My flirting with the bar boys paid off because one was placed in my hands and was subsequently passed around my friends (hope it didn’t die) and I was told to grab one handle of the bucket and carry the 63 teeny things down to the sea front. We then tipped the bucket up and made sure all of them went the right way and swam off to start their (hopefully) 100 year long lives. Oof – talk about a once in a life time!
The next day we b*****ed off, although I was highly tempted to take up the offers of staying put. If I didn’t already have my Indian family up here in Saiwara, I think I’d be looking to move down there to find work – it was that amazing!
Next was a not particularly spectacular (don’t believe the lonely planet) 12 hour train journey from Goa to Mumbai and our last night. We went all out and enjoyed a scrumptious dinner of gooood kebabs from one of the fanciest restaurants in the metro. In the morning was a heart-wrenching good bye to the Tiger 4 after which Rach and I hit the hot spots of Mumbai – the Gate of India, the Taj Mahal Hotel, McDonalds – before she b*****ed off and left me that night. I was quite upset to be rudely told I couldn’t go inside and wait with her and didn’t quite manage to hold back the tears after she was out of sight.
But hey, I’m back now and quite ok and certainly enjoying all the baked beans, pot noodles, coffee, and haribo that was so kindly donated to my ‘remind me of England’ fund.
Gin and Alain – thanks so much for the book. I’ve been given about a million more from the others too but am definitely looking forward to getting into it.
Spans – thanks for the card sweetie. I’ll get your address off Libs and send you one back soon. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY for the special day! I’ll be thinking of you.
Frick, I had an awesome time and I’m so so glad that you guys came out – thanks for making it so ace!
In other news – my flight home was booked today… as well as one back to India again! I still don’t know exactly what I’m gonna do yet but I figured that I can always cancel it if I decide to come home for good, or go elsewhere of course. So I will be landing on British soil on 21st August, and, provisionally, leaving again on Sept 11th. I’m so excited to see you all!
Bloody hell, that’s gotta be my most immense blog to date so I’ll leave it there. Don’t forget me here, all this way away. Keep emailing and sending letters etc. I know I’m rubbish but I do often think of you all and wonder how you’re all getting on. I miss you and I can’t wait to see you – in four months time! Whoop whoop.
Lots of love
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