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I've been out in Australia for 2 months now. Its been great so far and feel pretty settled. I know what I want to go and do, what I want to see and what I need to do to achieve these goals. However, there are times when something comes a long and puts a little bit of perspective on things, makes you re-evaluate life I guess. I got some sad news from home, that reminded me how short life can really be. You never know when it is going to be cut off and I guess most would say that means you need to live it to the full and enjoy every minite. I'm not sure that is what life is about. You need to have the ups and downs. The moments where you wonder why you're doing things and if it gets any better as well as the times where you sit back and think 'yes, this is what I want my life to be like'. I believe that you shouldnt regret things, just learn from mistakes or events that didn't quite go as planned. Thats what life is. Its full, rounded, a mixture of good and bad experiences. You need to be able to look back and go,'Yes, I had some bad times, but I came through them ok and they've made me who I am and made the good times feel even better. thats been my life, I've lived, experienced and grow through it'. It got me thinking why I was out here. Why this time I decided I wanted to make the most of the oppurtunity to see this country. Why now? To start with I felt like I was just running away from my life back home. Its been a bumpy year or so and although things were ok, it wasnt quite how I saw my life going. Maybe part of it is exactly that. I think though, looking at it more level headedly, that me being in Australia is giving myself the time to evaluate. To recognise how I have changed and grown as a person, to come to terms with a very busy 2 years and to find my feet again. I need to know whether this place is where I need to be to continue the next chapter in my life, or whether I am meant to be a London lass really. Its not every day that you get the oppurtunity experience something before making a decision and I am determined to make this next how ever many months really count. There have been many changes for me and I am still learning how to deal and adapt to some of them.
I spent the last two days really contemplating things and today took a 10k walk, on my own, no music playing, no email checking or facebooking. Just quietness, time, sun and fresh air. The peace that I think everyone needs once in a while. It was beautiful. The scenery helped I guess... sun, sea and sand are generally a good combination.
I think now I am ready to move forward in my story. To actually go walkabout (once i've built up a little bit of a base and possibly some more funds). I have so many plans now. The first of which is to spend my 25th (yes, it is about 5 months away, but have never been a particularly spontaneous person) on a boat in the middle of the barrier reef snorkelling, learning to dive and soaking up the sunshine. Am heading to Cairns for about 4 days before heading back to Brissie to spend Xmas with the family (if they'll have me). Then it is off to Sydney for New Years and more exploring.......
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