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Wow! Has it really been two months again since we've written?! Can't believe how fast the past few months have gone. Please check out our new photo album and videos as well.
Since we last wrote, we ended our connection with Para el Mundo, the volunteer organization that we originally came here with. They are an extremely well-meaning organization, but with some organizational and communication difficulties that became just a bit too challenging for us to deal with. There were a lot of different things that lead us to our decision to leave Para el Mundo, but the clincher for us was hearing all the struggles that the other volunteers were having with Julio and Gaby and that so much of the same stuff that we'd had concerns about were still a problem in the house after 8 months of trying unsuccessfully to deal with them and trying to conjure up some sort of semblance of support from the board members in Canada.
No longer being connected to Para el Mundo also meant that we would no longer be involved in the kids' after-school program, Robin Hood. It's a great program, but the planning and carrying out of Robin Hood was extremely time consuming and difficult in a second language and was really putting strain on our relationship, so we just decided that it wasn't worth all the effort with PaM or Robin Hood. It has been a relief to not have the stress of that program, and it is also great that they found a Peruvian male teacher to lead the group so it is sustainable during the times there are not enough volunteers.
A week after we were done with the Robin Hood program, we were invited to a dance performance that the kids were putting on. As it turned out, it was also a thank you celebration for us and lots of words of thanks were spoken by Gaby and Senora Elena and the kids dedicated their dance to us, as well as the theme song for Robin Hood, "Que levanten las manos". They also made us a poster and a little book with all their handprints and personal messages to us. It was actually very touching and it made the struggle of the program all seem worth it and it was a really positive way to end our involvement with the kids. We followed up with individual thank you notes to all of the kids as well, which were really fun to make.
One of the highlights of April was the birth of Adriana Sophia Castillo Medina (aka Sophie) on April 7 to our friends Rita and Benjamin. She is our little gordita (little chubby girl) and is getting chubbier by the day! It will be fun as she starts to get a bit more interactive in the couple months that we have left.
We also had a Bunko party at the community center in April. It was a small one, but loads of fun nonetheless.
With all the stress and changes that came in April, it was a really tough month for us, but we are happy to say that we made it through and feel stronger than ever now, both individually and as a couple.
May was a calmer month and we finally found the balance of work and play. We spent many more days at the beach and really enjoying life and the people here. We also got to take a trip to Piura because we wanted to buy a few more things for the schools, plus I was bitten by a dog who was chasing us on our motorcycle, and just as a precautionary measure I got some more rabies shots. Interestingly, they give them to you in your bellybutton...not cool! Ouch! But, happily, I did not contract rabies, so it was worth it! :)
It was also Rita's birthday in May and we invited them out for the weekend. The following weekend a local Peruvian singer and the author of the famous song here "el embrujo", Stani, was here performing at the coliseum. We went to the dance with Rita, Benjamin, Maria, Elizabeth and Marita. Although somewhat annoying with Mario and Jose trying to dirty dance with us all night, it was a great night of fun, cervesa, and dancing!
We are still teaching our English students that we've had since September and are teaching some private lessons to some of our friends, Elizabeth and Marita. We did some more painting and cleaning at Micaela,school and we were able to buy some more books for the schools and uniforms for Pallete school with some more money that came in from our Miracles in Mancora campaign. We are also starting up a women's group for moms with young kids, which we are really looking forward to.
Well, that concludes the newsy news section of this email, and I will let Shelly deliver the hearty heart side now! Take care and we'll see you shortly!
Love,
Stacy
Hola from Máncora.
We are heading into winter down here, which is really nothing like winter, although the nights do get a little nippy. I hope that as you approach your summer that it will be as fantastic as ours has been here, well maybe not quite as hot, 45˚ I would say is just a little too hot.
After returning from southern Péru where we were traveling with Stacy's parents, we started right back into the Robin Hood program. Many of the same challenges still remained, teaching in another language, discipline of the students, communication with PaM staff and cultural differences. This made the work much more of a struggle this time, and played havoc on our relationship as well.
The stress of all of our work here really began to wear us down for a time in April. We were shorter on patience with each other and did not seem to have the understanding and care for each other and the students that we once had. It was a struggle for me just to get myself to classes and Robin Hood, let alone be excited about the fact that I was there. There were some things said and done that I am not too proud of let me tell you.
But after enough time of feeling like my heart was no longer in this program, and doing some soul searching, I came to the conclusion that I could no longer be a part of the program, I just was not enjoying it any longer and the stress was becoming too hard on our relationship. Also just the lack of support for the challenges was just not there, and had never really been there from the PaM staff.
So that was a hard decision to make, because it made me feel for awhile that I was a failure for not sticking with the program as long as I could have, but then I realized that it was as long as I could. I could not longer stay and be effective and enjoy my time there. After many days and weeks I think that I could safely say that I felt good about leaving and realized that my role had just ended, not necessarily the influence that I had brought. The program was still continuing and I had done my part, it was now time for someone else to do their.part. I could actually be replaced! That was enlightening to me and humbling at the same time.
This year has been like that a lot for me. Realizing that I cannot control all things like I would like to think that I can. It is hard to let go of that, hard to be humble enough to say that I am weak and not good at certain things. I have had to realize my role has changed from what it was at home.
At home I was good at my job, knew what I was doing most of the time. Here is has been hard to feel like I do not have the skills that I had at home and to rely on other people to be stronger than me. I had to learn to step aside and let other people shine and be okay with that. It had been a humbling year and I hope that as we a preparing to leave that I will be able to take some of that humility home.
Even though I hung on to being in control for so long, it actually is more freeing to realize that I don't have to control things so much. That it is not my responsibility for making sure everything turns out good. Other people have parts to play and I have tried to learn to allow them to play their role, and embrace the role that they have without feeling like I have somehow been diminished. I'll keep you posted on how well I am doing in this department.
Leaving all connections with PaM after making the decision to no longer run Robin Hood, was a little easier. It was just time to stop trying to beat our heads against the wall and learn to cut our losses. It really was the best decision we could have made concerning our time here. The relief of making that decision has had some great side effects. We are must more relaxed and easy going. We enjoy all of the programs that we are currently involved with and we laugh so much more.
I have come to realize that I do not need to please people all of the time. That it is okay if people have different ways of thinking and doing things than me. That constantly compromising who you are only comes back later to nip you in the butt with regret. So it is easier to really be yourself, conflicts and all, because in the end you can live with yourself easier. When you are happier with yourself, you are happier with other people and able to give back more readily.
So these past few months have really been about discovering limits and learning to set some for myself in certain areas and expand them in others. My limited ability to forgive a wrong done to me has had to grow immensely this year. The biggest one being that I had to forgive Julio and Gaby for changing the experience that I felt I would have here. They made it more difficult than it should have been and the challenges with them were hard. But I did not want to keep that anger and churn it around inside my head, so I had to forgive them. That has been freeing for me and allowed me to see that in all things there is growth and opportunity for change if we are open. It is hard to remain open in difficult times, but coming out on the other side can be so life giving and rewarding.
I can now say that I am grateful for every experience here and for the ways it has allowed me to feel alive. That is what I truly desire to be, someone who is alive and living life fully. Doing the things they love with passion and heart. No matter how big or small those things are. And standing up for your convictions and following your dreams.
Living this way can bring me peace. I long to have peace in my life. This year has given me more peace than I have ever had in my life. I want to keep it.
As I sign off I wish you all peace no matter where you are in the world or in your life. That you can find some peace at the end of everyday, knowing that you are doing the best you can. I wish you courage to change the things in your life that keep you from peace.
The following is a quote recently sent to me,
Saint Theresa's Prayer
May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love
that has been given to you.
May you be confident knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence
settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance,
praise and love.
It is there for each and every one of us.
Bye for now
Shelly
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