Rubbish, that's what we are. But more of that in a minute. Firstly, it would be rude not to introduce you to the third member of our roadtrip, the lovely Lily. She's the love of Abi's life and the apple of my eye. We left Sydney on Thursday, proud parents of a bright yellow Toyota Hi-Ace campervan. I mentioned the numerous features in my last update, so won't harp on about them..... but it's got a fridge! A van that has a fridge. And 2 gas hobs. And a wardr...

G'day gang, how goes? In Sydney since Saturday, where the hell are all the sun-drenched beaches and beautiful tousle-haired surfer babes? It's done nothing but chuck it down since we got here, and it looks pretty much like a miserable version of Hackney so far. But with a fairly large bridge in the middle. And a strange pointy building seemingly made of formica, inside which you can pay the GDP of Poland to endure the high-pitched warblings of overweight people. ...

Right then, all change. Simply put, this road trip has been awesome. It's been hand n glove, Morecambe and Wise, Bonnie and Clyde (albeit without the thievery and killing and sharp suits) and it'd be wrong to split the participants at this stage in proceedings so South America will just have to wait til next year. So Australia here we come. Wandered into Qantas and changed my flights today, so the new itinerary looks (a bit) like this. Tomorrow we're flying...

And...relax. Rolled into Raglan on the 5th and stayed a couple of nights in a cool little backpackers just off the main street. All the rooms come off a central courtyard, with hammocks and comfy swingy chairs everywhere and huge cushions to loo around on and a nonchalant cat wandering about - the sort of gaff you could wake up in one day and realise that you've been there a month. Really laid back place, what you'd expect from the surf capital of New Zeala...

Eggs! Everywhere. Stayed in Taupo on the 3rd then up to Rotorua last night. As I mentioned last time in my geography lesson - there'll be a test later kids - this area is a huge volcanic zone, a part of the world where the earth's crust is at its thinnest. The result of this geothermal jiggery-pokery? - sulphur and various noxious chemicals and gases bubbling up through the ground, steam escaping in amongst the trees either side of the road, the Pohutu geyser sho...