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I've been dreading teaching my Senior 1 classes since we were first given our timetables: whilst we were originally told they were the equivalent of Year 10, we later learnt that, as Chinese students start secondary school a year later than their English counterparts, they're more like Year 11. Which means they're only 2 years younger than us! Luckily, the novelty of being a foreigner continues to serve me well, and the three classes I've taught so far have been nice to me.
Following the advice of other volunteers, my plan for the Senior lessons was just to introduce myself, tell them about the differences between Chinese and English schools and encourage as many questions as possible. Each of my lessons has started with cheers and applause, and talking about school in England has been great for getting them all listening and interested. They start lessons at 7.30 in the morning, we start at 8.30; they finish at 6pm and Seniors then come back between 7-10pm, whilst we finish at 3pm; they get 3hrs homework each night, I've told them I got around 5hrs a week. All of this has them gasping and groaning, some even banging their heads against the desk whilst they moan about it not being fair. Explaining that you get to choose which subjects you study from Year 10 gets a good reaction too, as does telling them that most people only study A-levels in 3 subjects (they study 9 subjects for their final exams). Uniform, detentions, class sizes, the concept of coursework, part-time jobs outside of school... all of these have been well-received too. Then there are lots of questions, all of which I'm grateful for because, however weird/inappropriate, they help to pass the time - and trust me, 45 minutes is a long time to keep 60 plus 16 year olds entertained!
Okay, so the questions I've been asked: do I like China, did I watch the London Olympics, what is my favourite food, where am I from, how long was I in China for, which football team do I support (I've bumped into a lot more keen football fans than I expected and have been religiously correcting the ones who call it soccer), do I like music, who is my favourite singer, do I like Justin Beiber (they were all, boys included, appalled to hear that some people in England hate the Beibs), can I sing for them, do I speak any Chinese... these ones have all come up at least twice. Others have asked what I eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner, or what the most important English cities are. Every single class has asked me if I have a boyfriend - some more than once - and fallen off their chairs laughing at whoever asked me. I've also had a lot of students telling me I'm beautiful, or that they love me. One of the first 'questions' in my first Senior lesson was one boy standing up and saying, "I have no question, I just wanted to see what colour your eyes are." Which was nice and awkward. I hadn't a clue what to say back, so I just laughed and asked if there were any actual questions - which actually worked quite well, getting the whole class laughing. Two students have, after I admitted I spoke no Chinese, tried to trick me into telling them I love them. But muahaha, I learnt how to say 'I love you' when we were in Beijing so didn't fall for it. Students - 0, Ella - 1! Other questions that have been awkward to answer include requests for my phone number and email address - I know other volunteers have given out their numbers to students, but there were such strong warning-type reactions when I hesitated before answering that I've avoided it. The same has happened when I've been offered Chinese lessons by guys at the back of the class and asked to eat dinner with students. Most weirdly (I thought), was one girl in my last lesson asking what I was doing for dinner and, when I told her I'd probably cook at home, asking if she could join me! My least favourite questions have been "can you introduce us to something interesting about English culture?" (ermmmm....) and "why are you left handed? They say left handed people are smarter than normal people... do you think you are smart?", although these aren't a patch on the "why did the English start the Opium Wars?" question that some little b****** threw at Nicole. Nicole has also had easily the weirdest question: "have you read and do you like 'Drarry'?" 'Drarry' being, apparently, gay-porn Harry Potter fanfiction that focuses on Draco and Harry. I've never heard of it until now, so how the hell Nicole's students have is totally beyond me. Very very weird!
Anyway, the lessons seem to have gone down quite well, and the celebrity treatment continues! My first Senior lesson ended with a crush of students jostling for autographs on their English books and photos with me, and although the others have been a bit calmer I've still had to spend nearly 10 minutes outside posing for photographs and even caught a good number of students trying to film me on their phones whilst I teach (ha, teach is a generous term for it). Apart from that, I've given out a few hugs, passed on my email address to a couple of people and nearly gone for dinner with two really friendly girls who introduced themselves as Star and Orange. Star's Chinese name includes the character for "star"; Orange just really likes oranges. I think I've also identified my biggest fan, who had approached me several times around school to take photos and tell me I'm beautiful even before I taught her class - this is the girl who asked if she could come for dinner with me. She's really friendly and I automatically love anyone who helps me out in lessons by asking questions, so I don't mind posing for about 6 photos every time I bump into her!
In other news, I've successfully established myself as the village idiot in our area of Jiujiang. Since nearly falling off a broken chair in one of Nicole's lessons the other day, I've also slipped walking across the square in the rain, falling flat on my bum in front of a group of students, and broken part of our front door off when trying to force it open (it jammed). Then, back at school, I tried to teach "Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes" to a Junior 2 class but, having given a very enthusiastic rendition of the first verse, completely forgot the second and had to stand in embarrassed silence for 10 very long seconds before distracting the kids with another game. You might remember as well that I said the Seniors have asked me to sing for them too? Well, for some reason, I agreed to sing Justin Beiber "Baby" for them. I got as far as "baby, baby, baby, ooohhh" before I realised I didn't know any of the rest of the song and falling into another uncomfortable silence. In the same lesson, in a moment of desperation, I offered to sing "Ilkley Moor Bah'tat" for them as well. And no, I didn't know past the first line of that either. I briefly considered blagging it, but I had a complete mindblank and all I could think of adding was "ee by gum"... The good news is that I think I'm becoming immune to embarrassment over here! I can now sing quite cheerfully in front of 60 baffled 13 year olds without even blinking, and I sang two full verses of a pop song for another Senior class yesterday - and didn't care at all.
Apologies for the horrific reputation I'm giving the British out here!
xxxx
(The photo is another one of my lovely Junior 2 class. I know I didn't mention them in this blog but I do look very awkward in it so I figured that bit was relevant!)
- comments
Nicole I think students: 4 Ella: 2 Students gaining points for the songs you got wrong and the chair!
Anna hahaha 'oranges', still enjoying your witty banter x
Angie HI Ella. Another enjoyable read and we are happy you are enjoying yourself. See, other people have to pay expensive rethoric lessons to conquer the fear of public speaking... you will be cool and calm after one year of teaching :-). Hugs form London. Angie and Ben
Jim Singing... a Simpson singing. No, 'tis against nature.
Livi Typical Ella! So Clumsy!