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London!
London, UK
A TRIP TO LONDON
Three years ago, I went to London with my parent my sister and my grandmother. It was great. We went on the most espectacular places on London, the Big Ben, the London Eye, the Picadilly Circus, the Tower bridge... We didn't go on the London eye because it was very expensive. But we went to the towers of parlament and we did a lot of nice photos. However, we liked more to go to the super shops that are there. We went to Harrods(we didn't bye lots of things because all it was to expensive for us) and we went to Hambleys the most espectecular toy shop we bought some toys there because me and my sister love them. In spite of the fact we coudn't bougth so many things because we had to go on a plain and they had to go inside the bag and the bag it was very small.Then we toke the plain back to Girona. :'(
- comments
Marc Nice story, Joana! :) It seems like you guys had lots of fun on your trip to London. As for your writing, I like the fact that it's extensive and that you use a range of vocabulary and connectors. Also, your use of the past simple is adequate. In future writings, you may want to consider these points: 1.- You "take" photos or pictures, you don't "do" them. 2.- "But" always goes after a comma, never after a period: "We didn't go to the London Eye because it was very expensive, but we went to the towers of Parliament..." 3.- Revise your writing to avoid careless mistakes such as: - Lack of punctuation (commas and periods). For example: "I went to London with my parent my sister and my grandmother" or "...and we went to Hambleys the most espectecular toy shop we bought some toys there because me and my sister love them." - Spelling mistakes. For example: "bye" or "plain." - Capital letters. For example: "London eye." See you in class! :) Your favourite teacher ( ;) !!!), Marc
supersonic99 okay i will correct it! thanks :)
Marc So she did it! She guessed your picture correctly! hahaha :) How are the holidays going? I'm keeping my fingers crossed that you will check this and see my message!