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Champagne Supernova:
Central/ Coogee: Saturday 01.11
China to Sydney flight 2/26hr was largely uneventful; with the exception of an inactive tv (which the Chinese were unable to fix) and my prime seat-next-to-toilet position. However, not being one to fuss I settled back with my german comrades to a reading marathon (Thanks Dalgy). At times the queue for said toilet extended the length of the plane and it quickly became acceptable for my knee to be leaned upon; I've have pleasanter flights.
After fast tracking passport control; charming smile and electronically chipped passport (UK take note... what no queues??) I had officially arrived in the land down under and couldn't stop smiling!
FYI: all you avid passport stamp collectors-'Sydney don't stamp passports anymore'
In the arrivals lounge I was accosted by a rather attractive Spaniard, intent on depositing 40kg of crack on me to traffic to Thailand; ok I lie, he wanted to get me a bus. Which he did. To my hostel. For free. Everyone else paid $15. LAD.
On freebie bus, I flitted between convo's (see Aussie already) with Portsmouth Boy (look out for him later) attempting to explain the location of Portsmouth (I'm no Michael Fish but hardly require this knowledge surely?) and Tyson, an evangelical Christian missionary whom simultaneously interrogated, responded and handed me an ultimate list of must do activities. God was shining on him today.
On entering my first hostel 'wake up'; booked by STA Rich because it had a bar; I was provided with an 8 bed mixed dorm.
An 8 bed mixed dorm equalled 7 men plus me.
I was greeted by an Irish child (who else?) boasting 'I'm doing the stride of pride'.... The walk of shame to every other nation....cheers STA Rich!
However my fellow residents were lovely; Mr Alsaka (37, needing some 'time out' from life, bunk above) Mr Boston (27, part time job seeker- full time party animal, bunk opposite) and Mr Adelaide (25, electrician,seeking Sydney fortune, bunk adjacent) they requested I join them on a brewery tour but I politely declined with the statement 'I don't want to get too messy tonight' Mmmmmm.......
After an afternoon stroll around the city, Central, Darling Harbour, and the wharf, I wolfed down a tasty prawn and chorizo linguine (Nicks). Before the jet lag engulfed me like a smashing wave and I retired back to the hostel for a nap. This was perfectly timed as Sydney is currently experiencing an unprecedented heatwave which resulted in tropical storms- lightning hell!!
Awaking around 18:30 I set off on my first bus and street exploration (google map less- check me out) to ex colleague and fellow public sector despondent Ginge K, who is based in Coogee; which is a good 45 mins away.
We did as absent friends do and talked s*** over a bottle of fizz (standard) This then ran out. Crisis. Ginge only had vodka. I don't drink vodka. But I did.....
Vodka + bubbles + jet lag + no tea = ultimate reprobate. Rents it's probably best if you stop reading now!
Basically, we were both a little tipsy before embarking on out night in Coogee, however proceeded to purchase a further 2 bottles of fizz in the bar. (Blanked out if not for photographic evidence and the joys of Internet banking). As expected my gullet reflex did not appreciate this lethal combination and I spent the remainder of the night head deep in toilet. Ginge is oblivious to any of her actions...
Eventually emerging from my toilet of hell, a good few hours later the bar was empty... I was alone.
Intoxicated logic stepped in and directed the only possible solution to my dilemma was to break into the hotel next door (naturally, as would anyone). This resulted in me traipsing forlornly around the deserted corridors, breaking into a maids trolley, stealing a fresh blanket and bedding down under an emergency exit for the night. Remembering of course to set my alarm for 6:30 before management could catch me.
There I slept undiscovered from midnight (Coogee doesn't party late) until 4am; when I was politely awoken by a young female (stride of pride?) requesting directions to the exit...if I, the mess on the floor (which wasn't even questioned?) was her source of direction, I can only imagine what redneck she left behind in the room...
Anyways, always the gracious host
I escorted this very special lady to the exit before RETURNING TO SLEEP ON THE FLOOR!! Beyond all possible reprobateness.
The bonus of such a debaucherous night was when my alarm jangled at 6:30am and I merrily sauntered on my (unobserved) way. I crossed the beach to get to Ginge's and experienced the most spectacular sunrise (remembering to photograph) making it all worth it.
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