"The Artist formerly known as Ralph"

As you all appreciate modesty is one of my many endearing qualities so it is with due humility that I feel I have to announce a change of name.

Instead of Ralph, I would henceforth like to be addressed as "The artist formerly known as Ralph."

You may be wondering why the change, so since you ask I will tell. The name "The artist formerly known as Ralph" is more in keeping with my new fame as one of the literary giants of the 21st Century.

One of the most respected hi brow magazines in the world, Leisure Wheels South Africa, has recognised my potential as the new Hemingway by publishing my article about our trip to the Central Kalahari Game Reserve in their August edition.

Capitalising on this dramatic entrance to the world stage of travel literature, I have written 45 words for the "Duly Noted" section of the Chilkat Valley News, Haines (audited circulation 17).

I am trying to keep both feet planted firmly on the ground of course but should you wish to receive signed copies of either article (I have plenty of both) please let me know.

Now where's my typewriter, I can feel the literary juices oozing………………….

The Artist etc