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Another exciting couple of days…Sorry I haven't blogged more (stop panicking dad) but I am alive and have been more than a tad busy.
So, apart from the obvious black skin poison trauma, it's been a pretty happy chilled couple of days.
It's getting hotter and hotter every day, which is both incredible and uncomfortable. 36*c makes for a fantastic sweat workout (technically I should be losing pounds), but it certainly makes you notice when the air-con stops working! The one in our bedroom is like a dream, but unfortunately the whole county had power down on Monday and Tuesday, so sleeping in 30*c was, well, let's just say I felt like a pig in an oven with a chilli spoon down it's throat.
We spent all weekend marketing the school to attract more children to study with us, which was fun but so, so tiring. The aim was to get 26 children, then we would have enough money to splash on activities with the children, but unfortunately we've only got 18. Having 9 in each class means that we have a lot less money to splash, but it's fantastic for teaching! My 9 little sponges are darlings, and teaching them is a pleasure. Nothing at all like in Britain. They sit there silently soaking up every piece of information I give them, spitting it back out when I ask. The whole learning ethic is different here. All the children, from the 9 year olds to the 18 year olds sit there for hours before bed reciting every piece of work they did that day until they can repeat it all without looking. Incredible. Everyone says they're clever, and no wonder! They may not be born naturally better, but they certainly earn the right to be. But even after all this; I still don't think I would spend my whole evening looking through Psychology after doing it for 7 hours a day. They're certainly determined little sponges.
Last Sunday we played the most games I think I have ever played in a day. From drawing a giant clock again to skipping, giant animals, relays, water fights, flagging and alphabet fishing. It was a very busy day with lots of sweaty children and lots of sweaty Millie, but a lot of fun. Flower seemed impatient to leave by the end, which was surprising considering how much she's invested in the school, but as soon as we got near to the pub I realised why. A great night ensued which turned into a girls night once Joshua left around 9pm (he saw some cleavage, panicked and evacuated. Very funny).
So, as I assume you've already guessed by the title of this post, I've had a little bit of a food/soup shock today. We were sat at dinner and a big bowl of soup was served. We've got used to the fact that we have no idea what is in most of our food and to just accept it and eat without thinking too much, but when I got the ladle and went to serve myself, I couldn't help but scream when I saw a giant eye starring back at me from the soup. You get to these points in life when certain things repulse you so much, it makes you thankful for even the grossest of things. I would happily have eaten a ladle of poo instead of seeing that giant eye, but it reminds you how underappreciated a good ladle of poo can be. For I would have been grateful for something as simple of poo, but let's just say my appreciation for a good eye-to-eye soup session was not great. At this point, I am ashamed to say that I had acted like a big girl's blouse from the shock of a big eye in my dinner, had dropped the ladle on the floor and with horrified fascination watched the eye roll under the next table. As if in slow motion, the whole next scene was played before my eyes; The eye, having found it's resting place next to the table leg of the opposite (thankfully unoccupied) table, was staring straight toward us, the optic nerve resting on the floor. As if we were all connected, I could feel everyone around the table all staring at the eye and wondering how on earth were we going to deal with this situation, and confronting the dreaded question; who would have to retrieve the eye? It rested for about 20 seconds before movement further up the table leg caught my eye. Before this, I had not noticed any invertebrate clung to the leg, as it was perfectly camouflaged, but as soon as it started moving everyone around the table (who had been staring at the whole eye situation) took a sharp breath. This whole time J hadn't noticed what had been happening, but he took this moment to involve himself via the method of shouting "JESUS, LOOK AT THAT EFFING GIANT SPIDER! AND WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? AN EYE?!?". As one, we all watched with anticipation as the 6 inch monstrosity crawled down the table leg and started towards its prey. It's commenced to spin a web around the eye, starting with the nerve, until the eye stopped staring and started to look like a small football. Once it had finished this whole activity (seemed like eternity but probably only took around 5 minutes) it then scooped up the eye and started back towards the table leg. This whole time not one person had moved as we had all been fixated upon the spider-eye situation, but the little old kitchen angel chose this moment to scare the beejeebers out of all of us by bringing the biggest wok I have ever seen down on the sider to make spider jam. Now, let me remind you of this kitchen angel. From day one she has fed us all sorts of delicious foods, and up until today (apart from chicken feet) it has always been incredible. She is tiny, and I mean about 4.7", but has the power to lift seemingly any weight. She throws woks that I can't even lift like they are paper. Basically like a tiny, Chinese, Aunt Jacqueline. So, back to the spider situation. Up until this moment, no-one had dared moved, and I think it's fair to say no-one had any intention of dealing with the spider. I think if the angel hadn't been there we would have evacuated very carefully, locked the room and burnt the building down instead of getting within it-launching-itself-at-our-faces distance. Fortunately she had silently fetched a wok, and brought it down on the giant b***** so the last thing it saw was its own bum. And that was the end if the giant spider. Unfortunately, she then picked up the eye, peeled off the web and put it back into a boiling pot. Someone's breakfast for tomorrow I presume… Yup, I'm definitely not eating tomorrow.
So, Joshua, who this whole time had been gentle chewing and finishing many ping-pong-ball sized white blobs, had found this whole charade hilariously funny. I, having been repulsed by the whole meal, was not pleased, so you can imagine my satisfaction when once he had finished his meal, Flower expressed her pleasure about the fact that Joshua had enjoyed and finished his testicle soup….
- comments
Mum x Are you suffering hallucinations (as an effect of the poison) Millie? A&E Medics are following this blog. They want less purple prose and more eyeball anatomy thanks. And a urine dip.
Millie Uhhhhh, thanks mum. -_- No hallucinations what so ever, eyeballs are perfect and all bodily functions are normal. Feeling as right as rain. Hello Medics- I hope you enjoy all the hilarious things that are happening to me. :)