We get on the ferry to phi phi and sit outside on the top deck, when we arrive it's the usual mad scramble for bags. On first glance, phi phi looks beautiful. We decide to walk to the hotel - golden hill as there are no roads and set off asking directions as we go. We start walking up some steps only to be told that it's the wrong way. We find the hotel and the reception after more searching and are shown to our rooms. Jordan and gaz get a room with a double bed so have to stay at a guest house a few doors down.

We head out for a look around and some food. The town seems really nice with small streets lines with shops bars and restaurants. We go for dinner at an american style restaurant, everything seems to be geared towards an american market. After dinner i feel an insect on my back and brush it away, it felt bigger than a mossie but when i look around i cant see it anywhere, it must have flown away. I put my bag ob and as i look over my shoulder there it is. Ive only got a f***ing oraying mantis ob my shoulder. Im sat next to gaz but as he's scared of butterflies he won't be much use. Paul is the man for the job and swiftly removes the manti.

We start on the drinks before hitting the buckets, banana bar us really chilled but the English tout is s*** but we go in anyway and jordans bar plays hammer time by which time were pretty wasted and start dancing to it in the street with our shorts pulled down. The streets are like Spain at night, touts everywhere trying to get you into the bar, hate it. It's pretty bad in the daytime too with people asking you to go diving constantly, not the best place we've been to so far.

I decide that I want a joint before the match so head down the beach stumbling all the way. I get chatting to an aussie guy and share the joint, after a few minutes i'm really boxed wasted and start to go under, I realize that I can't walk and I'm down here on my own and will have to ride it out, f***. Some yanks sit near me discussing drinks which sends me over the edge, vomit number 1 rears it's ugly head. I hear some Thai guys near me possibly trying to move me, I'm having none of it and try to wave them away. I fall asleep at the table only waking to vomit twice more.

I wake a final time at around 4am and everywhere is shutting down but I feel good enough to walk. I can't find my way off of the beach so follow a person a 20 metres ahead of me. After a while she stops and as I get near I ask her where the town is. She turns out to be american and also lost and drunk. Fortunatly she knows where the town is but I can't help her with the location of her guest house. I get my bearings and head for the hotel. Paul is passed out on his bed and I do the same.