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I've always known there was something a little special about me. I'm sure you've noticed it too. Maybe when I walk past, and you feel an inclination to drop to your knees, or fetch me some chocolate. It's only natural. You see, I have a sprinkling of Polish royal blood coursing through my veins. Well, possibly. Maybe. Probably not. Google gives me no evidence. In fact I'm pretty much going off one vague, throwaway comment my Mum once made which I have obviously clung to desperately. Whatever, bow to me! But royal or not, I do have some Polish ancestors and so was excited to visit.
So when we arrived in Poland, did it feel like coming home?
No, not at all, but it is absolutely gorgeous. We stayed in the old capital of Krakow for two nights, and wished it was longer. This is definitely one of my favourite cities in Europe.
We loved wandering through the old town square, which is a medieval picture surrounded by classy restaurants that are surprisingly cheap, a clock tower, the old cloth market building, and a fountain that children play in. Dominating the square is St Mary's church, with it's two spires standing at different heights, with very different designs. The story goes that each tower was built by a different brother. The brothers fought over who's tower was bigger and better (insert eye roll here), one killed the other in a drunken rage and then flung himself off one of the towers. A knife hangs now in the doorway of the old cloth market building, said to be the murder weapon in the feud.
Like Prague, the horse and carts that should be cheesy looked gorgeous in this setting and took us back in time. The band playing in the square took us back to a different time, churning out some Elvis while little old polish people automatically tapped their feet and swung their hips - too cute! Pigeons, respected by the Polish as old princes (i.e my ancestors), scattered as we walked through rows and rows of market stalls, stopping to indulge in chocolate covered strawberries or drool over a rotisserie. The weather was warm and so was the vibe - Krakow is a wonderful, friendly town.
We had an organised dinner with the busabout crew, where we ate a delicious starter of bread with a cream cheese and chives dip, which you combine with another dip of lard and crackling - looks dreadful, tastes delicious! We also tried Pierogi (stuffed dumplings), accompanied by some polish vodka which nearly proved my theory that I would wake up flu free. Take that, germ ridden throat!
After dinner we kicked on to a club called Diva, who were having a beach party and had covered the entire floor in sand. A pretty cool place and we enjoyed a few more Polish vodkas with everyone, but the place wore a bit thin when a group of pommie guys arrived and started jiggling around like apes, singing backstreet boys while standing on tables, taking their clothes off and pouring whole pints of beer over each others heads. When one then came over to our table and shook his beer hair out all over us, I decided it was time to drag a fired up Mark and my fluey self home to bed. We were pleasantly surprised by the number of young people out, its actually really lively and would be a great city to party in...if we had more time :-(
We started our full day in Krakow with a bike tour - probably in some ways the worst we've been on: we were split into two groups, our guide was dry and stern and we didn't get much out of him, we kept losing people (each time the guide cracked the s***s at us?!), and the other guide broke her ankle mid tour. Our tour went an hour over, the other one 2 hours! Which made it a really full on day for the guys who had chosen to do a salt mine excursion in the afternoon - Mark and I were thankful to have the rest of the day free to wander.
Despite this it was a beautiful day and although the tour guide didn't offer much content, the ride in itself was wonderful and a great way to see the wider city. We rode along the beautiful river dotted with paddle boats and kayaks, though the old universiy district with a stop to watch the little moving figures of the musical clock, past a dragon statue that breathes real fire, along the castle walls and through beautiful parks and squares filled with markets selling flowers, food and crafts. We took a break for a quick beer at a riverside club with a fake beach, where a couple of the group jumped into the public pool on a boat.
We rode past Oskar Schindler's factory - if you haven't seen the movie Schindler's List, he was a German and member of the Nazi party, who saved thousands of Jews by employing them in his factories which produced mess kits for the Nazis. By maintaining a good relationship with the Nazis, paying endless bribes and ensuring his workers were deemed "essential" to the German war effort, he managed to keep many of them from being deported to Auschwitz. We also saw a section of the wall of the old Jewish ghetto. I was surprised at how ornate it looked - why would the Nazis have bothered making it pretty? Until the guide pointed out that it was shaped like traditional Jewish gravestones.
We went back to the Jewish quarter for dinner, a free night but a large group of us went to a crepe restaurant for dinner and then met back up with our guide, who took us to a dessert restaurant where I had the most ridiculously decadent icecream sundae: chocolate ice-cream, whipped cream, two sticks of chocolate, 2 rows of milk and white chocolate, 3 wafers and chocolate sauce. I wished to be 10 again so I could have finished it! We all had a giggle when one of the girls ordered a single truffle, and it arrived on a large gold platter. Lush!
All too soon it was time to leave Krakow, and we moved on to another Polish town called Zakopane. This is the highest town in Poland at 800m above sea level, and the alps make it a popular ski resort in winter with both the Polish and the Slovakians (the alps cross over their border). Because of this proximity, the dialect is different here; a blend of Polish and Slovakian, not that I would be able to tell! These eastern languages are tough and completely unfamiliar.
Zakopane is really pretty, and I could tell it would be especially so in the winter. In the summer though, it has a kind of carnival vibe with lots of markets in the town and a cable car up the mountain where we had a go on the luge, and there is also a high ropes course and zorbing. I also loved the houses here. They all had the steep roofs of a ski town, but the shape of the houses, the decorate carvings in the teak walls and doors, the large iron paneling on the roofs...so unique and pretty!
But what Mark and I loved the most about Zakopane was dinner. I couldn't tell you what the restaurant was called, but our guide Mel appropriately dubbed it the Meat Palace. She had earlier warned that Polish are mega carnivores...and after this we understood. After walking in past the massive grill and endless rotisseries, our table ordered a platter meant to feed 6-8 people. What came out was a huge flaming platter with enough food for about 12, piled with every meat you can imagine: 4 different kinds of sausages, steaks, marinated chicken skewers, a whole fish, bacon, pork knuckle and more, plus potatoes cooked 3 ways, 3 piles of different coleslaw-like salads, and a side of bread with more of the lard/crackling dip. Holyyy crap. So. Good.
These are definitely my people, and Poland is definitely going on that hopeful next time list!
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