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Just an extra bit..
42 things to know before you live with Ugandans..
1. Exotic fruit & veg is in plentiful supply. However, you will not eat any of either. It just doesn't happen.
2. Your indicators will not be used to signal a change of direction. They will rarely be used at all but if you do feel the urge, you will only use the right indicator to tell the vehicle behind that there is oncoming traffic and it should not attempt to overtake. But it probably will anyway.
3. Everybody has 'malaria'. In Luganda, the word for fever is malaria so do not be startled when someone announces with a shrug that they 'have malaria'.
4. Africans don't read books. A saying I heard from a Ugandan himself.. "if you want to hide something in Africa, hide it in a book."
5. If you are European you are a mzungu. If you are American you are a mzungu. If you are Asian you are a mzungu. Even if you are African but your skin is a fraction of a lighter shade, you are a mzungu..
6. Some people think mzungus are some sort of super-species sent from God himself. Sample from a letter we received.. "thank you so much for coming to earth to take my punishment. I want to be your child and live with you forever in heaven." Slightly scary..
7. Just like on tv, young kids don't wear shoes. However, they do have shoes they just don't actually like wearing them.
8. You will have about 7 children. Possibly more.
9. Everything you eat will fried or deep fried. Take a roll, deep fry it and it becomes a tasty snack called a mandaz.
10. Everything you eat will be carbs. And it will make you both full and fat very fast, so be prepared. On a side note, not finishing your plate is an insult to the family. "i'm full" doesn't cut it!
11. Eveybody you meet will have a mobile phone. Nobody you meet will have airtime.
12. You will see 'sodas' everywhere, they come in glass bottles and you will need to exchange an empty glass bottle or drink it there to avoid the wrath of the shopkeeper .."where is my empty?!"
13. Don't expect to eat chicken.. It's so expensive! Beef, goat and pork are all more viable options!
14. Bins for litter don't exist.
15. You're probably aware being homosexual in Uganda is a crime punishable by death. Don't be startled though when you see 2 men holding hands ..or a man dressed in the campest clothes youve ever seen, accessorised with a cowboy hat and leather studded cuffs. Homosexuality just isn't even on the radar.
16. L's and R's are interchanged. Even in the p1 english exam balloon will be written as 'baroon'...
17. Anything can be transported by boda. Man + goat, 5 men, 6 boys or 1 full size bed frame.
18. The walls are alive.
19. Your mosquito net will become your best friend, saving you from fighting lizards, spiders and nearly ants...
20. Your school will have a night guard. He will use a bow & arrow.
21. Men wear ladies flip flops and boys come to school wearing 'cute and cheeky babe' t-shirts.
22. Tea or 'chai' is drank constantly. You are weird if you don't 'take tea'.
23. The sugar for your tea is measured in tablespoons. They will usually take about 3 spoonfuls. You have been warned.
24. Children in your class use razor blades as pencil sharpeners. However, do not fret, they are experts. They have been using them since baby class.
25. Any sauce you have with/on food will be called a 'soup'. Or if your lucky, they may get closer and have 'source' written on the 'menu' instead.
26. Ugandans don't smile in photos unless you ask them to.
27. Men go to the pub in their free time. When you ask what women do for fun, the answer will be 'crafts'.
28. Animals aren't kept in pens. They are tied by a piece of rope to a nearby tree.
29. A village is called a 'trading centre'.
30. Each village will have a 'hole'. This is a room where you can pay to watch tv. Mainly football or a Nigerian film if your lucky.
31. Yoghurt comes in bags, not pots.
32. Juice is also sold in bags which you pierce with a straw while trying not to squeeze too hard. An African Capri-Sun to put it simply..
33. Ugandans don't sleep.
34. The cockrel will crow at 6.10am on saturday and Sunday morning to make sure of that.
35. There will be a pile of leaves beside your long drop. However, toilet paper can be bought. It takes some poor volunteers longer than others to find this out.
36. The peanut butter is runny.
37. Words are repeated to emphasise the meaning 'now now' being straight away as opposed to soon and 'close close' meaning only a slither of air in between.
38. Grasshoppers and White Ants are delicacies. Locals will try and make you try these then laugh at the mzungu who 'isnt used' when you gag.
39. To a Ugandan primary 4 class, postcard sounds very similar to pussycat. This can lead to confusion when the lesson focuses on writing a postcard. Hilarity follows.
40. Caning and abortion are illegal. "but not really..."
41. People do still eat with their hands. Most people nowadays do have 'tools' though. But only a fork. It is rare to come across a knife or a Ugandan who knows how to use one.
42. Everybody is part of a clan and has a name chosen from the Clans names. Family members are part of the same clan but will not share the same second name - or first name as it is here.
- comments
Nadine Loved this list! Wondered what happened to numbers 43-45 though :-) xxxxx
Isla ive actually no idea, im sure i did write them?! possibly not.. xxxxx