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Happy New Year
This is the final blog before our experiences and photos go into a book, which will be cherished for ever.
Our last meal was at La Sirene in Cap Gris Nez, a lovely fish restaurant, which we have been to a few times and if ever you are in the area, it is an absolute must. We savoured every mouthful as we knew that the adventure was about to finish. A few weeks before I didn't want the moment to come, but I think we both reached the stage in the middle of November, as the weather deteriorated, that we knew that the time was right. The 15th November was a miserable, dull and wet day, the cloud hung all around. The visibility was poor, but just as we ordered our meal we looked across to England, suddenly the sun lit up on the horizon and the white cliff shone, just for a few minutes. It was as if 'it' almost winked at us, as if to say, 'it's time - time to go home.' We raised a glass to 'us'
Six weeks on I still keep smiling when I reflect on what we saw, what we did and what we achieved. I know we both feel very proud of ourselves and each other. Perhaps this inner feeling of happiness will continue forever, who knows!
As I write this blog on the last day of 2016, I think of this time last year when Jeff and I were spilling over with emotion as we were about to take off on our 'Grown Up Gap Year' - it was our moment and we were to grab it with both hands. After being with each other for 35 years we decided to take a leap and find out more about each other and the world that we live in.
We must have known that our relationship could survive; although we did have some fear and trepidation, maybe that was part of the attraction. Some couples reaffirm their marriage vows, but that definitely wasn't for us. We just needed time together and enjoy one another's company without the distraction of everyday routines. From this, I have learned that Jeff is my absolute, ultimate companion and soul mate - we just fit together and cope with whatever we are faced with.
There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved. George Sand
I can only say that it is absolutely lovely to be home- we do not seem to have any desire to go off again.
Have we settled back?
Yes is the answer, I just love being back at home, picking up the phone and actually arranging to see friends and family. Although I loved and relished organising accomodation, I have to say that I won't miss booking multiple stopovers for a while or packing my bag again !!
I think I value being back, being here and reflecting on our year. It doesn't mean Jeff and I won't go off exploring again but not for a year, maybe a couple of months at a time.
The year of 2016 - will be memorable to each and every one of us for different reasons. We have had so many experiences that will forever be in our minds and have made an impact us.
So much happened while we were travelling and we were in so many different places. I will never forget listening to the news about Brexit, in the Purity hotel in Kerala -Jeff had suffered from a dreadful bout of food poisoning and needed to rest, so we listened to BBC World News as the news broke. The next day the staff asked our thoughts and shared their own. It was fascinating that they hoped it would help them and their country. It was amazing that while we were on our European Tour, in the main, we were unable to get BBC World news.
I think travelling has made me realise how much rubbish has become such a problem. It seems that plastic, in whatever shape or size is the greatest menace to 'the world.' Where ever we have been and where ever there is a problem with the economy and there are no structures in place for the clearance of rubbish; it gets everywhere and is a blight on the country. Piled high at the side of the road, scattered over the land, thrown on beaches, beside railways and in rivers , it truly covers the landscape. However where ever this happens there is a glut of unemployed men, yet there seems no connection between the two. This is a problem that really needs to be solved!
I think that the expectations of work are so different in Italy and France, in comparison to England. It appears to me that the British work so hard and some feel stressed in their work and the pressures of everyday life. We generally work 8-6pm ( 8 - 10 hours a day), with perhaps a half to an hour lunchbreak; I know many work longer hours and work impacts on weekends.
The Italians, closely followed by the French start work at 9.00-9.30, I know this doesn't apply to all, but they close for 3-4 hours at lunchtime. We, of course, critisise this and I have, for many weeks, but it is their way of life - Is it right or wrong?
How does any work get completed? Is this why ecomonies are struggling?
It's a fixed way of life- I can't see it ever changing - lunchtime is to eat with family and friends, go to the restaurant or to the beach. ( This is different for those who work in tourism, but then everything closes for the winter.) The mornings are busy, as are the late afternooon. There is a thriving community spirit. They are happy and really do not understand the English. Naturally, it's a different story if you are struggling.
In India, the complex social hierarachy of the caste system, is so established, engrained and systematically enforced. It is extremely hard to understand the intricate system that thrives through lavish, interwoven set of customs, beliefs, religions, gurus, demons, superstitions, rituals, Sados. If you are born into the lower caste system - there is just no chance. Their poverty is in stark opposition to the richer family. It all seems so unjust. In stark constrast to Italians and French, the majority of Indian people work almost every moment of every day to earn very little.
I think India was the most morally and emotionally challenging for me and yet it is the place that I feel most drawn to. Many have questioned my reserved judgement, as they loved their experience of the country and this has left me wondering. Perhaps it because we didn't do an 'organised tour' we saw 'Raw India.' A friend said to me - 'you can't wait to leave India, yet the experience is like a magnetic force that draws you back. ' I have to say that I feel that perhaps I will return.'
In my world of being 'culturally correct' and not wanting to 'say' the wrong thing, I was surprised in India, Vietnam and Sri Lanka about the fact that they openly spoke about not wanting to have 'black skin' - it was very clear that the darker the skin, implied that you were a 'worker,' you worked in the paddyfields or on the land. It was amazing to the extent that skin was covered.
For me this clearly will have a detrimental effect in these countries. The men 'do not' want to work in the paddyfields as it was 'back breaking' work , demeaning and poorly paid. We found that they preferred to be drivers, but they still lived with their parents in the family home, with their children and would inherit the land, which had happened for generations, but they clearly didn't want to 'work it' - not sure what will happen there! What will happen to the land and paddy fields as more and more choose other roles? It's a bit like fruit picking here- no one wants to do it!
In Sri Lanka, the tea is picked by teams of 'Tamil Ladies' who are employed because they work hard and work long hours for very little money and yet can build a community from very basic accomodation without moaning. I loved the story in Udaipur, where 'Tamil ladies' were employed by a successful frenchman, who owned the hotel and paid them more than the men, which is clearly unheard of. Although it caused its own problem, he believed that the men were lazy and took advantage of him, so paid the ladies well, irrespective of caste.
Naturally the nominations for USA elections were in full swing. What surprised us in Asia was the actual fear of the impact of Donald Trump. What ever our thoughts and I have to say mine as well, they felt 'safe ' in Obama's hands and were extremely concerned and openly talked about the dilemma they felt Trump would pose for their country and their future. While travelling on the back of a scooter in Ho Chi Ming City, the young 22 year old driver, Lynn, discussed fluently about the fear and concern that the young people of Vietnam felt. Let's wait and see what happens in 2017.
Finally I think I loved meeting the people of all of the countries we visited - how proud they are of being part of their country. The overwhelming feeling of how people smile - where ever we were and even when we felt a little uncomfortable I always tried to smile - if I received a smile I knew all was well. In India I was always amazed how beautiful girls and women perched on the back of scooters with their iridescent saris sailing in the wind and however chaotic the backdrop they would always smile.
I think the Vietnamese for me, are the most friendly and embracing people we met - I have to say we just loved their personalities and their energy and of course their bravery when crossing roads!!!!
The world is extremely beautiful and we saw the most splendid scenery and places in Argentina, Austraila and New Zealand - well almost everywhere. I just hope our generation and the generations to come look after it, so that others can have the opportunity to see what we have seen. I know that's a bit idealistic, especially as the world is so vulnerable, dellicate and so dangerous. It's a shame there is not a magic wand that could cure the world problems of hatred, anger, religion and power, because the bottom line is that the majority of people just want to get on with their lives in their country.
Thank you so much for all your wonderful comments about my blogs - I'm glad you enjoyed and am very grateful that you took time to read them.
Love to you all and I hope 2017 is good for you.
Final notes from the 'Old Boy'
When I wrote my last missive at Sourdeval in South Normandy in November I thought it would be the last as we were near to home and I thought our adventure was over. After all of the new and unique locations we had experienced over the previous 10 months, I really only had one final ambition and that was to visit the Memorials and beaches associated with the Normandy Landings in 1944. Jackie had been there many times on School trips and told me all about it but we had never had the opportunity to go together and altough it was a 'not to be missed' experience it left me a bit bemused!!
I left Normandy without buying my customary bottle of Calvados but still wearing shorts. We travelled North relatively slowly and decided to console ourselves with visits to a few of our favourite haunts along the way! Our reward visits included a little time in Le Touquet which we generally visit on a regular basis and love, lunch at one of our favourite restaurants at Cap Gris-Nez called La Sirene and a very final visit to Calais Vin to replenish our stocks for the coming months. None disappointed and I still arrived home wearing shorts with the exception of a rugby game in Dunedin NZ (v. cold) and our lunch at La Sirene. The last few days were perfect with the exception of the reducing temperatures but when we were in the restaurant the clouds parted over the Channel allowing the sun to show itself over the White Cliffs and when I got home I found that I still had an unopened bottle of Calvados.
All ambitions very successfully achieved for 2016!!
- comments
Ann Whiteley Great final blog and a fitting end to your story of adventure. I will definitely be buying a copy of the book!! So glad to have you both back safe and well and importantly incredibly happy with your life together. Have a wonderful 2017. XX
Kate It is good to have you back home, seeing your faces, happy and grumpy...ha ha. Best wishes for the year 2017 and never let go of the memories of 2016. X
Anne McLaughlin So interesting to read all your thoughts and impressions about the places you've seen. What an enriching and memorable experience. Looking forward to seeing more of you in 2017! Anne xx