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We arrived at Hoi An after a seamless 50 min flight from Saigon absolutely starving. As our taxi drew up to the hotel it was clear that we weren't exactly staying in the centre of town, with just one tiny restaurant opposite the only sign of life we headed into our rooms for a quick turn around before heading back out. Unfortunately, as we walked out of our hotel, the lights of the restaurant were switched off plunging the entire street into darkness. Not eating wasn't an option and so we jumped into a taxi and told the driver to take us to food (the boys might have added beer to this instruction). Luckily, our driver knew of the only place still serving and twenty minutes later we were tucking into slices of pizza and cold beers. Foolishly, I thought we'd then be heading back to our hotel but several beers later, we then started a pool contest (I soon stopped being allowed to play) and once again didn't hit the hay until the early hours.
The next day we made full use of the hotel's free bicycles and after ignoring my pleas to take a taxi ('I don't think I can cycle for twenty minutes in this heat') we were on the road heading towards the beach. After an agonising twenty minutes which nearly killed me we crossed the final road and cycled up a white sand path towards the ocean. Paying 50p to park our bikes in the secure parking lot (aka tin hut manned by an eight year old girl!) we walked towards the sea. I honestly thought that the beaches in Vietnam were not going to compare to those we'd seen already in Thailand and Cambodia but this beach was beautiful. Having been accosted and harassed by every local woman to sit on her beach lounger and eat at her restaurant, we settled down under some shady bamboo umbrellas and just sat and watched the (huge) waves roll in. I was happy to have finally got off the bike, BG was happy as we were about to eat lunch and Matt was happy as the girl in the sea right in front of him had her bikini top washed off in the waves. Simple things.
After a quick dip in the ocean (as I approached the boys with my camera I distinctly heard them telling each other to suck their stomachs in for the photo) and battling the huge waves, we were ready for some food. We'd only eaten amazing food since arriving in Vietnam and had read great things about the seafood available at the beach. Not at this beach as it turns out. I ordered vegetable rice, BG had veggie spring rolls and Matt had seafood noodles and they turned up looking pretty much the same! I had cold rice with some runner beans (?) and chopped carrots on top, no sauce or seasoning. BG had the leftover beans and carrots wrapped up in rice paper (again no sauce or seasoning) and Matt had cold noodles with beans, carrots and two tiny prawns on top. It was by far the worst meal we'd eaten on the whole trip and forced it down hoping to find something better later on.
The rest of the day was spent sun bathing (or burning in Matt's case), relaxing on sunloungers and checking out the fit birds in bikinis. Now up until this point, BG and I hadn't done a lot of checking out fit girls in bikinis but times had changed and this was now the accepted way to spend an afternoon. Boys. Gah. As the sun started to set, we dusted the sand off and walked back up to our eight year old bike guard and cycled home. Or at least, I thought we were cycling home but as I was at the back, they took full advantage of my complete absence of any sense of direction and duped me into a two hour long 'scenic' ride through Hoi An. By the time we got back to the hotel I'd practically developed piles and insisted that we were getting a taxi into the town centre for supper.
Later that night, we were heading to the centre for the first time. Matt, who'd done his research (via a Top Gear special) knew what to expect but as we turned a corner and came to the river, BG and I were completely speechless. The whole town is lit up by lanterns at night in every shade of every colour. Buildings were small, quaint and with an Asian charm we hadn't seen anywhere else. Added to this were the floating candles bobbing along the water which together created the most tranquil and beautiful setting we'd ever seen. We must have all stood in complete awe for at least five minutes before we were able to move or speak before, inevitably, hunger kicked in and we made our way to the waterfront to find somewhere to eat. As BG and I walked along, we suddenly realized we'd lost Matt. Turning around, we immediately spotted him having gatecrashed a group of Vietnamese girls photo, four tiny girls and Matt standing behind them looking pleased as punch while the girls got the chronic giggles.
We soon found a super cute restaurant right next to water. Matt took some persuading, the idea of vintage chic being a new concept to him ('are you sure, it looks a bit run down') but once we'd sat down and started reading the menu he was converted. Because the place was right on the water there were marks on the wall showing how high the water had come in recent floods, the fact that all these marks were above head height was a little disconcerting. We ordered and a few minutes later, from the shabby, one wok kitchen at the back came three absolutely delicious meals. We ate, chatted, drank and then looked through the photos Matt had taken earlier in the day, only to find that he'd taken them all in vivid mode - which he thought was a good thing! 'We look cool', no Matt, we look like Oompa Loompas. BG couldn't resist the opportunity to show Matt how his camera actually worked and Matt was hilariously blown away by it's technical capabilities ('OMG it does black and white') and spent the rest of the meal taking photos of us, the food, the walls, the staff, the drinks… anything that would stay still long enough in complete wonder at his new photography skills. Unfortunately for me, this ignited a new found enthusiasm for photography and for the rest of the trip, instead of being able to hang out with Matt while BG took photos as I'd planned, I was once again left on my todd while they both snapped away constantly. Boys. Gah.
Next day, there was only one place we were heading and that was the beach. Ignoring my ever hopeful call ('are we getting there by taxi?'), my saddle sores and I were back on the bike and once again peddling seawards. Upon arrival, we were determined to find a better restaurant and chose a different lady's sunlounger to sit on. As we were about to walk up to the restaurant to get lunch, who other but Anna and Helen walked towards us. Now convinced they were stalking us (and they that we were stalking them!), they lamented over their lunch, which was, like ours, the worst they'd had in Asia. After arranging to meet them that night for supper, they told us of a beach bar right at the end of the beach that they'd read about. Deciding we couldn't risk another bad meal, we snuck away from the owner (not before she'd given BG a proper telling off which traumatised him for quite some time after) and walked up the beach. Thank goodness for Anna and Helen for tucked completely away in a spot we'd never have found was the Soul Kitchen, the most perfect beach bar we'd ever seen! Large wooden sunbeds, deckchairs, an alfresco pool table and the most delicious selection of food, beer, ice-cream and even rose (!), we could not have been happier. After an amazing lunch, we lay in the sun, drank, laughed and took in the sights (that at one point included fishermen going out to sea in perfectly circular bamboo pods which were so cool). As the sun set we struck up a game of pool (that once again, I was soon banned from) and played game after game (or for those who had a match ban, read our book) while enjoying the most spectacular sunset.
Back at the hotel, it was a quick turnaround before we headed out to meet Anna and Helen for supper. As the heavens opened, we sat in the restaurant watching gallons of water poor through the ceiling where it was caught in huge drums (a saucepan really wouldn't have cut it), what would have brought a London restaurant to a complete standstill was a minor annoyance for staff here and the service and delicious food was unaffected. After filling ourselves with as much food as we could manage and, for Helen and Anna, a photo slide show from the now semi-professional photographer Matthew Sam, we headed across the water to find a bar that remained open after the 10pm town curfew. Luckily for us, Matt soon found the 'Meet Market' (!) and we were all soon seated by the water, drinking cocktails and 30p beers, again until the early hours.
Next day and we all headed back to the beach bar and spent the day in the sun. As the sun got stronger, we decided a dip in the sea was a good idea. Twenty minutes later and we were completely exhausted from fighting the huge waves. Akin to being inside a washing machine on a spin cycle, losing my bikini top for the second time was a step too far (rejecting my west country roots and refusing to be half naked in front of my cousin), I got out, quickly followed by the boys. Another afternoon was spent eating, drinking and pool playing until the sun had completely set.
One of the main reasons people visit Hoi An is to have clothes made by the extensive range of tailors (more than 400) and having been beach bums for long enough, day four was the day to shop. Keen to get tailor made suits, it was actually the boys who were most enthusiastic about the shopping that lay ahead (Matt at this stage thought BG was a normal boy who would shop in the normal boy way - had he known the truth, his enthusiasm would have probably been dampened somewhat!). Arriving at the small tailors, the boys went straight to the tailoring fabrics and I immersed myself in every floral print they had. Initially just wanting one suit each shopping frenzy soon took over and before long Matt had soon ordered a suit, three pairs of golf trousers, two casual shirts and two smart shirts. I say Matt, because in the time it took him to do all this, BG was still deciding on what colour he might want his suit. Half an hour later and I had finished ordering a variety of floral trousers, floral tops and floral dresses. BG was still deciding on what colour he wanted his suit. In fact, the poor man helping BG had already been to his fabric warehouse and back three times on his moped with rolls of fabric that might satisfy BG's vision, all to no avail. Realising that he didn't have enough room to fit all his new clothes in his suitcase, Matt went off the buy a small additional suitcase to fit all our purchases in. He came back. BG was still deciding what colour he wanted his suit. Intervention was required and we dragged BG out and went to get some lunch while having to listen to him complain that nothing was 'quite right'.
The afternoon was spent exploring the markets and pretty shopping streets, and in Matt and BG's case, taking copious amounts of photographs while I lagged behind. Later that night, we were excited to go to supper as it was Hoi An's monthly full moon celebration. Not really sure what to expect, arriving at the water's edge revealed a town lit entirely by candlelight with hundreds of candles floating down the river. We decided to take a short boat ride and spent a very chilled twenty minutes floating alongside the candles and taking it all in. We decided to eat at a tiny restaurant on the waterfront and had probably the best meal of our whole trip. Delicious fresh noodles, fish and vegetables and spring rolls that literally melted in our mouths and although completely stuffed, we couldn't help but order more and more until we could hardly move. Determined to have an early night, we'd arranged to meet Anna and Helen for a quick drink after supper but desperate for an early night (aka before midnight) I'd made Matt promise that we wouldn't stay out late. Four hours later, two buckets of tequila and vodka cocktail later ('Matt, I said I wanted Fanta!'), three bars later, having nailed the moves to Gangnam Style later, we eventually got kicked out of the last open bar and made our way home in the early hours - again.
Next morning over breakfast, BG announced that he'd decided on the fabric for his suit (well, narrowed it down to three) and so we were off to the tailors again. This time Matt knew what to expect and his enthusiasm was notably reduced! Matt and I tried on all the things we'd ordered the previous day one thing after another after another while BG lamented over his three fabric choices. Finally he decided, much to our relief, and we were glad that the saga was at an end. Only of course it wasn't as the fabric choice was just the beginning, next he had to explain the style and fit, the buttons, the stitching and the colour of the stitching, all in great detail while I apologised to Matt as he slipped slowly into a BG induced coma. Finally we were out of there and back at the beach soaking up the sun.
After another late night watching football (boring, luckily I'd begged Anna and Helen to come and keep me company), playing pool and drinking copious amounts, the next day we were back at the beach for our final day in Hoi An. More delicious food, sunbathing and swimming ensued along with the PROMISE of an early night as we had an early flight the next day. You won't be surprised to hear that we ended up in another bar until 3am thanks to Matthew Sam. Sat out in the street on rickety tables, we drank, talked and laughed ourselves silly much to the entertainment of the waitresses. As my tiredness hit the wall, I insisted that we leave - Matt finally agreed and went for one last loo stop before we left. However my happiness was short lived as he arrived back at our table five minutes later with an armful of vodka and redbulls ('they were free, couldn't say no'). Conceding defeat I sat and watched the boys get more and more tipsy on beers and vodka redbulls while trying to push thoughts of our early flight out of my mind.
- comments
matthew sam To everyone reading this, i'm not a alcoholic..... it was just the price of everything, 60p - £1 a pint! I couldn't resist. Its true he did take that long deciding a fabric!