Before I apologize for not updating the blog for 2 months, let me just say WE LOVE INDIA.It appears my talent for procrastination has stayed with me even when I have nothing else to do.But the truth is, our time in India has been such a collection of random, fleeting experiences that it has been hard to summarize and, up until our return here after Nepal last week I'm not sure we would have been able to make such an unequivocal statement.You see, India isn't easy to love.In real life we have good days and bad days, right? Well in India, this is reduced to a good five minutes, or a bad five minutes. Within a single hour here we found we could be giddy with excitement and wonder and then overcome with frustration at people trying to rip us off. It has been an absolute roller coaster (or more appropriately, rickshaw) ride and I think in order to reflect the experience of traveling in India…WE NEED A MONTAGE!!

Fun with Nuclear Weapons:

Arriving in Delhi we were pleasantly surprised to find a cool, calm and quiet city not at all like all the horror stories we had heard. Of course we soon found out this was only because everything was closed for Republic Day, the national holiday. We took advantage of this and headed to capital city's parade only to find it was being blocked by the police (and army, and some, um, tanks and guys with machine guns). After much discussion between the crowds and officers the crowd seemed to decide it would be more useful to push past the guys with machine guns and make a run for the parade ground and so…we went with them! Miraculously we did not die in a hailstorm of machine gun fire and everyone made their way politely to their seats. Yay! The parade was absolutely amazing, regiment after regiment marched past, my favourite being the dudes on camels which top Canada's Mounties by a mile. India's military might was in full force, culminating with a large missile rolling past, airplanes flying overhead and some dudes doing acrobatics in silver spacesuits while riding motorcycles (???? don't ask me what military purpose this has). Later while watching the news we were surprised to hear that the large missile that rolled past us was actually the first public viewing of India's nuclear weaponry…uhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Bollywood Update:

Just a quick one - we have seen posters of my Bollywood hunkaburninglove in tailoring shops (told you he was a model!) I think I scared some lovely tailors by shrieking and pointing at their windows and gushing about how we were in a movie with him. They had no idea what I was talking about.

Mr. Laloo's Day Out:

After Delhi we made our way out to the far west of Rajasthan to a place called Jaisalmer, "The Golden City" so named for the golden fort that rises up out of the desert where we signed up for a 3 day camel safari into the desert, which was fantastic. I don't mean to brag here, but MY camel, Mr. Laloo, was the leader and was draped in decorative awards he had won for his beauty and leadership qualities. Unfortunately, Mr. Laloo was also going through puberty and had some issues when he smelled a lady camel anywhere in a 15 mile radius. He would start foaming at the mouth, stick his tongue out and get all disoriented (some parallels here, I think with male humans, no?). Turns out he was actually only the leader because if he went behind the other camels he would get jealous and start biting their bums…oh Mr. Laloo!!! Other highlights of the 3 day trip include learning to make chapatti, meeting some fantastic friends from Montreal, and having to cut the trip down to 2 days since Connon had some "issues" with sitting on the camel and walked for half of it J

Wedding Season:

To make sure we don't forget to plan our own wedding, the presence of wedding celebrations has been a constant throughout our travels. We have observed a groom arrive on horseback, dancing in the streets, been woken up by a drunken wedding party brawl 3 hours later, been invited to watch a wedding, met some newlyweds and all their relatives at a train station and were invited to a reception in the next town (a very fun party until it was broken up by the station police…I think we were getting too close to the platform edge). It has been such a fantastic part of traveling that we almost considered getting hitched here ourselves. But I think Connon would have had trouble riding on that horse…

Forting About;

After Jaisalmer we saw practically every fort there is in Rajasthan. We visited Jodhpur, "The Blue City" with a magnificent fort rising out of it, Udaipur, "The White City", with a palace and forts rising out of the city's lake and Jaipur, "The Pink City" with yet another few forts rising through the midst. These places are ABSOLUTELY AMAZING and they just kept getting better - mirrored rooms, intricately carved window screens, painted ceilings and stories of war and sacrifice. Connon was in History Channel heaven and I have WAY too many photos through carved windows.

Shakespeare & Sushi in Rajasthan:

To distinguish between the various cities in Rajasthan there was one memorable experience that sets Udaipur apart from the others. While touring the city palace we noticed a sign for a performance of Shakespeare's Measure for Measure inside the palace that night - for only 3 dollars! Score! So we bought our tickets and put our best clothes on for an evening out (that would be…jeans.). We were surprised to find a red carpet and guards on our arrival and then even more surprised to find only about 30 seats and a big couch in the front…and THEN, everyone stood up to greet the Maharaja of Udaipur. We were watching a private audience of Shakespeare with the KING!!!! Wait, it gets better. After the performance we were about to leave, having met 2 friends from our day in Bollywood but they started offering us drinks, and we're not talking coca-cola here people, this was WINE (you don't understand how rare this is in India) and then the waiters started bringing around canapés, including SUSHI (much more of a rarity in India). While I'd like to say we got up the courage to thank the host for such a lovely evening, in reality we just drank a whole lot, ate as much as we could and closed the cocktail evening down with a lot of drunken goodbyes to the security guards at the palace. Did I mention it only cost 3 dollars?

The Biggest Cliché of Our Lives:

We ended up at the Taj Mahal on Valentine's Day. Totally accidental, I promise! It is closed on Fridays…Anyway, we were kept from feeling too cheesy by the company of two friends.And yes, it DOES live up to all the hype.

And then We Got Stuck…

In Varanasi! We have the most mixed feelings about this place.It may be the only place in the world where you can watch people pray, bathe, cremate their loved ones, eat chocolate croissants, learn to play the sitar, watch a dog threesome AND get a massage all in the same day.There are worse places to stay for 5 days, but you know when the children selling postcards know your name it might be time to move on. Just as India is so unlike anywhere else in the world, Varanasi (from what we have seen) is so unlike anywhere else in India. Luckily we did not get food poisoning here like everyone else we met.In fact, we haven't been seriously sick at all in India !!!!(10 hours to go …).

Bollywood Update No. 2:

We finally went to see a Bollywood film last night at the cinema.It was really good! Unfortunately I think this was a cross-over film so while it had some great cinematography it was lacking in the many cheesy dance numbers I was hoping for.It is an interesting experience watching a film for 2 ½ hours and not much of it being in English.We understood most of it though.Well, we think we did.Now I just have to read a synopsis and see if we were right.

Hallo…Money, Dollar, Photo, School Pen?

So as much fun as it is to write about horny camels and brushes with royalty, this would not be a decent account of our experiences in India without some discussion of the poverty in India and the challenges that come with traveling through it.It is everywhere, it is inescapable.And we have both traveled through some pretty grim countries, but I don't think I have ever felt as sad as I have here when I see children not much older than my nephew begging. And alongside the guilt you have with people asking you for money while you say no after you've just bought an expensive ice cream cone and are now stuffing your face with it, there is also the guilt you feel at constantly being suspicious of everyone.Because in the touristy areas, we were inundated with the constant sales pitch always starting with the inevitable "Where are you from?" (This gets old after a while). Connon was much better than me at remaining friendly and open with people, but we both found that it has really been a test of endurance/patience/keeping a sense of humour.The truth is everyone here is on the hustle.And so, we have just had to keep reminding ourselves that the hustling is necessary in a gigantic country with not enough resources for everyone.We've tried to give where we can and be polite and kind when we can't or won't.I know most of you will have seen Slumdog Millionaire, which is an interesting portrayal of poverty and inequality here.For a much darker (and probably more realistic) portrayal we highly recommend reading "The White Tiger", we have been reading heaps of Indian literature and that is by far the most enlightening.Read it!

Ahhh…this montage has turned into a full length epic.Oops!We have had so many other experiences in India…Connon playing cricket in the streets of Delhi, stuffing our faces with sweets… mmmm….jalebis…laddoo…mmm… oops, sorry, I've got distracted. Um, what else? enduring cold showers, spotting tigers, avoiding scams, getting henna tattoos and then acupressure treatment from the same dude, shopping (oh, the shopping!), eating, eating, eating…sigh. We leave here in 10 hours and we are very sad to do so.But, we'll be back. India has definitely got under our skin J

Next stop: Istanbul, Turkey.