And so it begins. Dad took me to the airport at around 12pm and after a quick coffee I was left alone to explore all the delights that Birmingham Terminal 1 has to offer. I've been delayed enough at that airport to know how excruciatingly lacking in entertainment it is, so was slightly disappointed to find my flight was running two hours behind schedule. I went through security and in a moment of holiday excitement I bought myself a couple of trashy magazines and a lager shandy. Bad idea. Adrenalin had been coursing through my veins for the last 24 hours meaning sleep the previous night had been kept to a minimum. Three sips of a shandy and I was ready for bed. I have the alcohol tolerance of a pensioner.

A packet of pro-plus and a large coffee were subsequently purchased to counter the effects previously described. I probably spent more in 3 hours at Birmingham airport than I will in a week on food in China.

Eventually got sent down to board the plane. Found myself tutting quietly to myself that the only free newspaper Emirates had to offer was the Daily Mail, before spotting a copy of New Statesman hidden behind some Hello! magazines. Snatched it pronto and walked down the concourse to the plane feeling smug.

Emirates planes are an experience in themselves; pink and orange cushions sat astride garish patterned seats, the ceiling awash with tiny LED lights in case you might, in a jet-lagged stupor, feel blessed enough to look up to the plane roof and see stars.

As soon as you board the plane you are greeted with hot towels, and then provided with a lunch menu explaining what delights are in store. On the screens in the back of the seat in front you can watch the plane take off, and then gaze at the ground through a camera suspended somewhere under the plane - probably not a sight for the faint hearted.

Once airborne I ordered a tomato juice, ate some horrible salted biscuits (I miss peanuts) and settled down to watch a
film on the in-flight entertainment system. I picked 'The Joneses'. Error. Not a great film, but easy enough to watch in my sleepy state.

Eventually they brought round the lunch, I had greek salad, followed by lamb with potatoes and green beans and then strawberry cheesecake. I ordered a glass of white with the meal and finally started to enjoy myself.

After watching a couple of films, I had a nap and was woken up with coffee and banana cake. Flying into Dubai airport was incredible, even at night the view is awe-inspiring. The airport, however, was another story - very disappointed the only food and drink places I found were McDonalds, Starbucks, Haagen Daaz and a shop that sold Tyrell's crisps. Luckily the stop-off there was shortened by the delay at Birmingham. I left the lounge and headed for the gate where I got my first taste of Chinese culture. Rather than waiting for their group of seats to be called the Chinese passengers crowded round the desk, all attempting to push through at once.

The next flight was on an Airbus - A380. I have been told by many of the boys in my life that this is an important plane. It is a double decker, with special cabin pressure. Obviously I am very excited. I'm sat at the front. On a normal airplane this would be first class so it is almost like I am sat in first class... Except it really isn't. The only thing that really impressed me about the plane was the fact that the take-off was so smooth I almost missed it. Otherwise it was just like any other flight, except because you are sitting by the stairs you are constantly reminded that you are not in first class and you do not have your own champagne bar.

The hot towel was less impressive the second time round and by the time breakfast was served (croissant and chocolate muffin) I was dozing off. As we flew through the
mountains you could see the peaks bursting through the clouds - magical. Lunch was served at what felt like 6am and although I'm not opposed to eating leftover Indian takeaway for breakfast, chicken curry at that time wasn't particularly appealing. It was accompanied by yet another Greek salad, and a banana