Today I slept til 4pm. Am feeling much better than yesterdaybut the heat is near unbearable. Last night I had my hair plaited in the streets. A practical decision - the humidity has my hair reaching enormous sizes and the heat just makes it unbearable. The hairdryer and straighteners taking up half my rucksack are now redundant.

It was while sat there with three childlike thai women pulling my hair in all directions that I had my first creepy crawly experience. I felt something scuttering over my feet. I looked down to see the most almighty cockroach glowing red at my feet. I wanted to run and scream but I was bound in position by the three girls furiously yanking my head. Instead I lifted my feet off the floor and remained silent. One of the girls noticed and kicked the creature away. 'It away' she reassured me. Pathetic. Still, I'm so proud of myself for not screaming.

Feet back on the ground I took this opportunity to sit and watch the world go by. A small thai woman, old and wrinkled, slowly pacing up and down the road. In her hands the strings holding over a hundred multi coloured balloons. In perfect alignment as they floated silently past. The air in Bangkok is so still the balloons hardly moved. The low neon glow that fills Khao San Road, so softly penetrated by these bright and colourful helium balls. Sitting watching this, I smiled. It was magical. Back and forth she walked up and down the road.

Sitting there, watching, it wasnt long before it started to kick in. The overwhelming feeling of guilt. A man, smiling and happy, approached me for a cigarette. I gave it, he thanked me and stood smoking in the street. It was then I looked down. The man had no shoes. On his left foot was a blistering stump where his toe should be. I wanted to jump up, give him my shoes and tell him he shouldnt be walking on these filthy streets with his toes like that. I wanted to give him bandages and disinfectant. Instead I watched him, smiling, walk away.

A young girl approached me, no more than 6 or 7. It was nearly midnight and she was wandering the streets selling flowers. Torn between emotion telling me to buy this sweet little girls goods, and rationality telling me if she doesnt make any money, they'll stop sending her out, I turned her away. Persistent, she challenged me to a Thumb War.

'No'

'Paper, Rock, Scissors?'

'OK'

'First to three. I win, 20 Baht'

She lost, but I handed over 100 Baht. Gleefully she ran off only to appear again two minutes later.

'For you' she said, handing me a rose with a Little courtsey. Sy\uch a beautiful little child she was abso;lutely adorable. I wanted to pick her up and taker her home with me. What kind of future could this girl have, really? What difference would my 100 Baht make, really?

Bangkok is amazing. So many stories I'd heard, noone lasts more than three days. But looking around, on the surface, I see no reason to leave. Until that is, you look, really look at the people. Guilt is the only thing that makes me want to leave. My squallid little hotel room, small, basic but clean is probably the most unspeakable luxury to some of these people, with its air con and hot water. I earn in an hour what these people earn in a night.