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It started out as a bit of dry skin protruding from beneath the fingernail of my big man finger on my left hand. That was a month ago, and I scraped it out with some metal object like a nail or something. Then it grew back, even bigger. I attacked that one with a knife. Within a week the skin around the protrusion was swelling and it was pushing the nail skywards. At night I would lie on my pillow and think about how this cancerous tumor was going to ruin my upcoming trip to Europe. I would be in a cafe in Lithuania, and blood would start tricking from my nostrils before my eyes would roll back and I would collapse onto the cold tiled floor with fur covered locals standing above me. I would wake in a white room, tiles up to the ceiling, strange Baltic murmurings down the hallway and every now and then a scream knifing it's way around the corridors. I would be trying to get my phone so I could ring Vanessa to organize getting the family to fly in and be by my bedside. And this would be how it happens. And this would be where it ends. So I went to the doctor and he looked at the enormous growth now threatening both my fingernail and my life. He picked up his phone and spoke to someone (obviously a specialist who was going to organize an emergency bed in some start if the art treatment ward). Then the door opened and the receptionist brought in a silver canister with an aerosol type spray button on its top. He asked me to hold my finger up as he sprayed this freezing death onto my lump. Let me know if this hurts he said. It hurts. Yes I know. Now it really hurts. Yes , I know. And then came the words... You will have to come back in 2 weeks so I can refreeze the wart. Wart? - ummm.. I nervously looked at him. I am meant to be going to Europe in 2 and a half weeks. A smile spread across his face - I don't think a little wart like this will stop you from going to Europe. So in 2 weeks I am going with brother, sister and niece to take my mother back to Lithuania. And the wart won't cause me to pass out and end up in hospital. I probably won't even get a nose bleed.
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