5:00 pm

I remembered today that in tourist resorts random things do not happen for no reason. Hence it was a day of chilled wandering, trusting that things will go crazy once I meet up with Jean François.
As there's not much to report, have a story from India.

After five hours of standing up eating nuts and telling people my good name, my purpose in india and my marital status (the three questions that comprise the extent of most Indians' English), I arrived in dusty Tiruchirapalli and began preparations to leave.
The plan was to make the 40-minute flight to Sri Lanka the next day, so I had to find a travel agent. Finding a travel agent in India is easy; just stand in a built-up area looking lost or lachrymose (word of the day :) http://tinyurl.com/62ubwj).
Finding a travel agent who will charge you the right amount for the right flight, and then, once the transaction is complete, actually give you plane tickets, can be a fun game.

I have to wait a while after entering the first one, a dusty office on the main street near the train station, for the joyful man behind the counter to finish speaking with his large chainsmoking friend in Tamil (they reject Hindi in Tamil Nadu).
'Namaste,' I press my palms together in greeting.
'Hello,' he smiles trustworthily, 'what is it that you would like?'
'I would like to go to Sri Lanka tomorrow.'
His eyes gleam as he says something to his friend, provoking a chuckle.
'Yes, I have one at 7am in the morning, it is costing 200 American dollars.'
'I'll give you fifty English pounds.'
'Fifty pounds, yes yes, it is right.'
'Can I pay by credit card?'
They chatter jubilantly. A lot of cigarette-waving and laughing.
'Yes, you can pay by credit card. But not here, you must come to another office.'
Clinging to the fact that I had entered of my own accord, rather than being touted, I follow him outside where he leaps onto a dusty motorbike. I consider my options. He gestures for me to join him. The last, and only, time I was on a bike, it was a tiny one and I totalled it into a wall. I decide hey, at least it's not me driving, and they're probably easier to control when they're big, and climb on.

I'm sure he rides his bike quite often, to and from work and whatever, so i suppose it's normal to nearly crash a lot. Airborne dust means that I miss out on most of the truly terrifying bits on account of necessarily closing my eyes.

The tiny, stuffy, murky office he takes me to is spacious and air-conditioned, and some of the employees have name tags. Either this is an extremely prosperous scam, or I'm not actually being screwed over. My grinning companion speaks to a stern black lady called Myra, and she books me a flight on the airline's Hindi-language website.
'Fifty pounds.'
I offer her my card, and she brushes the dust off her stoneage cardreader. She swipes the card.
'Your card is bad.'
'Um, OK, can you try it again?'
She tries it again.
'It does not work.'
This is a problem. They've already paid for the flight online, so if I can't pay them back, it could come to fisticuffs. My companion leans against the door and lights a cigarette. Myra looks under her eyebrows at me.
'Do you have another card?'
'At my hotel, I think, yes, I have another one.'

We hop back on the bike and speed off, me having to keep my eyes open to point directions. I don't think there's any money on the other card.

Back at the aircon travel agent, my companion seeming disappointed in me, we try the battered Visa Electron I haven't taken out of my wallet in years.
'It does not work.'
I try to think through the spectacularly maladaptive flight or flight response.
'Ah. Can you try the first one again?'
It doesn't work.
'Can I try?'
Skeptical, she slides the bricky machine across the counter. I swipe the card. The screen says 'processing', I wait, the screen says 'insert card.'
'You have to put the card in, it's chip and PIN,' I enthused, delighted that my kneecaps would remain shatter-free.

I don't know if they felt shown-up, or disappointed at the loss of a good tourist-stomping, but they didn't share my dancing, chatty pleasure when I entered my PIN and the payment went through. The ticket even got me onto the flight.