Stupid Comments of Customers!!! (and good jokes)

Made by Rimke & Luisa "Hotel Australia Miles"

-Should I show you an "Australian Tradition"?
-Which?
-Skinny Dippin!
-What´s that?
-To go swimming nacked!

"Can I convince you to take my number?"

Comment from our boss: (we were working really hard)
(Luisa is drinking a can of Coke)

Boss:Luisa that's ok, that you drink the can. You don´t have to pay for it!

"We made you hot - so we have to make you cold again" (Ich bin das Lieblingskind vom Boss!!!)

-Do you like movies?
-Of course! Why?
-I love "Coyote Ugly" (Girls are dancing on the bar and do a show)
Do you know it? Why don´t you girls go dancing on the bar? You would have a lot of more customers!

-Is your name princess? Well it should be!

-Can I sleep in your room?
-No, we are not allowed to have guests in the rooms! Our boss wouldn´t like to see it!
-Do you have a window?

Conversation of two customers:

-I´m tired!
-Oh, that means you don´t have enough brainactivity!
-That´s probably right! I´m a Trucker!!!

Rimke & Luisa are cleaning a house of the pub!

-Is this door new? Was it here before?
-Oh crab! I think we ´ve forgotten to make this bed yesterday!!!

-Have you got a pen and a piece of paper? Because than I could write down your number!!!

-I would like to have a Jack Daniels and Coke! No with Dry! Or no! A Canadian Club!!!
(Luisa is confused)
-What???
-No worries!!! Calm Down! Leave on your pants!

-Where are you from?
-Germany!
-Oh, I´ve been once to Germany! Do you know the "Reeper Bahn"? Would you like to go there with me?

-I´ve been to Germany!!!
I went to Munich!
Germany is great!!!
I love the " Oktoberfest"!
-Have you seen something else from Germany?
-No!

-Have you ever been to the USA?
-Yes!
-Yeah maybe, but not when I´ve been there too!

-I need pepper!
-Here you have pepper in a shaker!
-I want a grinder (Pfeffermühle)
-We only have pepper in a shaker!!!
-Go and bring me the manager!!!
(Dieses war ein so genannter Arschlochkunde!!!)

-Which town do you have on your "Hard Rock Café" Shirt? Is it Roma? (kleine Stadt mitten im Niergendwo/Outback)
-No! It´s Rome! Capital of Italy!!!

Yeah, I´m also bringing my torch (Taschenlampe XXL) everytime with me in the bar!!!

-How was your night?
-Hot! My aircon is not working!
-You can sleep in my room, my aircon is perfectly working!

If there would be no law, I would kiss you right now!!!

-What can I do for you?
-I only would like to have your empty glases!
-Oh, that's all? Can´t I do anything else with you to make you more happy?

-Hey I´m Hayden! I´m living on the white Sundays!!! I´ve seen we have a pool here in Miles. Should I teach you there how to snorkel?

Conversation with two Kiwi´s:

-Where are you heading for after Miles?
-New Zealand! Is there anything you recommend seeing?
-US!

-You wanna migrate to Australia?
-Yeah! But it´s hard to get a visa!
-No, it´s not! Merry me!

-Wanna clean my house? "Wink wink"