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It's been a while huh?
When I last wrote I was hoping to be third time lucky in doing a Robben Island tour on Saturday 24 October. Well I achieved it. Unfortunately, as tourist attractions go, it was pretty pants. The history was interesting but the way the tour is delivered and the rushed nature meant it I wasn't massively impressed. What did I do on the Saturday night? I honestly can't remember unfortunately - got extremely drunk in the LSB bar is a safe bet!!
Sunday - lazy day in the hostel. Watched the mighty West Ham come back from 2-0 against Arsenal to earn a 2-2 draw. That had me buzzing!!! Unfortunately, very shortly after this I had some very sad news from back home that meant I would have to leave Cape Town for home the following evening.
Before my flight on Monday evening however I did manage to squeeze in a wine tour to Stellenbosch with 7 other people staying at LSB. A great time was had and it helped me forget my woes a little, albeit temporarily!
Unfortunately my return to the UK meant that my volunteering project in Namibia had to be cancelled and my trip did not re-commence until I arrived back in Cape Town on Tuesday 10 November. Scheduled to stay just two days before flying to Australia (this was never going to happen) I ended up changing my flight to Monday 16 November so I could have one last crack at liver failure in Cape Town.
So the run down of those 7 days/six night can be summarised as follows:
Tuesday - arrived safely at hostel around 1pm. Got very drunk.
Weds - got very drunk in the hostel. Ventured out into the outside world - gave some free dance lessons in the Dubliner - lost phone. Idiot.
Thursday - got drunk. Can't remember the details.
Friday - managed to leave the hostel for a few a hours with a trip to the beach at Camps Bay. Went to possibly the world's worst restaurant. Went back to the hostel - got very drunk.
Saturday - determined to give my liver a fighting chance of functioning past the age of 26 I managed to hold out on a first beer until almost 7pm. A record for me at Long Street Backpackers and by some distance too! Alas these good intentions didn't last and between 10pm and 12.30pm a heavy duty session meant I again ended up very drunk. I managed to lose my fellow revellers on the streets of Cape Town (I say lost, I think the reality of what happened is I sneaked back to LSB for a few more shots!) but anyway I couldn't find them for ages afterwards. Have accumulated about 3-4 stamps up my arms in search of my friends, and a trip to Poza for a falafel, I gave up!! And then... they turn up don't they?!! Wen't so Zula for more beer!!
Sunday - always going to be a big one this as it was Peaches birthday and less significantly my last night at LSB. Anyway, I woke up feeling dog awful and begging for mercy on being forced to drink alcohol (with only limited success). Having had some cracking food prepared by Kat (thank you!!) the drinking resumed at the bar. Now this may not be the exact course of events but this is how I recall it... everyone seemed to be a little tired (I myself was forced to drink another foul penalty shot for drinking a Red Bull which did not qualify as alcohol - thanks Chris!! :P)... when suddenly Queen came on the stereo and within a short space of time all hell at broke lose and the night never looked back... an extreme percussion set using hands at the bar, singing, air guitar from The Presidente, wigs, hats - all sorts!! I think I managed crawl to my bed around 2am...
Monday - Chris and Kev burst into the dorm at 8.30 and insisted that we all joined them at the bar to drink for their shift until 4pm and carry the electricity generator out to the car. Well, what can I say about this other than I have never seen a hat party occur pre-9.30am before, fun times... around 7-8 of us were forced to sign a contract not agree to leave before 4pm, with myself given special dispensation to leave at 12pm due to my airport transfer being booked for this time. Anyway, 12 o'clock came around far too quickly and was forced to say a very sad goodbye to all of my buddies... special mention to Chris and Kev though who have looked after me and always made me feel welcome - I won't forget it!!!
Anyway, the day went rapidly down hill from there!! I had a 3.20pm flight booked for Cape Town to Johannesburg - flight delayed two hours. Five hours sat on my arse at Cape Town airport - great fun, especially when i could have been at LSB. But what was to come later was much more infuriating. Having arrived at Johannesburg airport at 18.30 for a 22.00 flight I was still cruising for time. Only to be told when I tried to check in with South African Airways that despite my name being booked to the flight (and me holding my passport in hand!!) their system was not showing an eTicket number and therefore I couldn't be checked in. Oh and the good news? Their c*** up, despite being no fault of mine, was actually MY PROBLEM and I would have to resolve it!!!!!
To cut an extremely long story short I spent the next TWO HOURS stomping back and forth between the SAA check in desks (Terminal B) and the British Airways/Qantas ticketing desks (Terminal A) trying to resolve this unprecedented problem!! Anyway, after two hours and me being close to throttling someone (anyone who got in my way quite frankly!!!) a solution was found. As the eTicket debacle was clearly a mystery that not even Sherlock Holmes could solve we would resort to printing me a paper ticket - GENIUS!!! The only remotely funny moment was when I left the BA ticket desk for what would be a final goodbye (by this point the goodbye had become almost as emotional as the one at LSB earlier in the day) when the woman from BA packed me off and advised "If she doesn't let you on that f*cking flight then punch her in the face as there is no reason why you shouldn't be able to" - probably not the best advice given to a man with steam coming out of his ears!!!!!! Anyway, fortunately I was now checked in with much apology. My face smiled but my mind said "shove it!!!"...
Anyway it's now approaching 8.45pm and with security plus the world's most inefficient border control yet to be tackled I'm still not home and dry. I made it but my stress levels went up to unacceptably high levels for a backpacking DJ!!
NB. I now hate Johannesburg airport more that most things in the world and vow never to return if it is humanly possible.
The only bit of good news was as I stomped along the departures lounge (post ordeal) was that I completely randomly bumped into a friend I had made in Mossel Bay, who, as chance would have it was also on the same flight and planned to stay in Perth/Fremantle area. Anyway, once we landed at 12.30pm local time in Perth we sorted out a hostel for the next couple of days. For the rest of the day we just strolled around really and took in Fremantle and another beach town (the name escapes me) a train ride away. Both shattered from the flight we returned to the hostel for about 8pm.
And here I find myself now. On the world's worst computer that is so inept it doesn't have the capability to allow you to post on Facebook - so sorry for the lack of interaction people. And Chris, I do miss LSB and life post departure has frankly sucked a big one (see above), but this damn computer won't let me post it!!
Anyway I think I'll end this blog now... I was hoping to be humorous... I think I achieved a rant... but I really am enjoying myself, honest, it's just been a rough 24 hours!!!!
Much love, DJ!!
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