Before we were able to step out of the airport in Hanoi, Harry in toe, we encounetered our first major obasticle. Jen got stuck at the Vietnamese border. Of course she immediately panicked and declared to everyone she was going to have to live there forever, before realising that Sam simply had to flash the border control guy a smile and she was allowed to cross Border Control to collect the neccessary cash. We immediately failed in paying attention to the warnings of the Lonely Planet guide and were taken for a complete ride by the taxi. He pulled up outside some casual hotel and kindly unloaded our bags into the foyer and ordered us a room (for a cheeky bit of commission). This was a complete nightmare as we had reservations elsewhere. After a couple more stops at unknown hotels we arrived at the Hanoi Backpackers Hostel which was lush. The journey was pretty scenic however, including people in cone hats working in the rice fields and the most rediculous site ever: people on motorbikes transporting actual trees on the back. We were also in a pretty horrific mood as soon as we arrived as it was really foggy.

We went for a wonder that evening, it was quite a long wonder. We saw the Ngoc Son Temple which was in the middle of the lake and were surprised to find a sacred embalmed giant dead tortoise in there - this was apparently the last resort for Wedge who had a small breakdown. Hanoi was a strange place. The next day was much more interesting as we visited Hoa Lo Prison, which is now a museum. It was harrowing; none of us being particularly clued up on Vietnam's horrific civil war and extended past. We met an American woman there who was distressed by Vietnam's portrayal of what went on.

That night we caught our first sleeper train up to Sapa - an ancient hill station on the Chinese border. This started well with Harry treating us to a sack full oif beer and vodka. Our cabin party plan was quickly foiled by our fourth cabin member. She was a lovely girl from Saigon who enjoyed practicing her English with us, however, also enjoyed her early nights. Lights out by 10. Apparently it is the culture in Vietnam to get to bed early and rise at 5/6am. We felt very British. Sam, being on the top bunk, had a poor night's sleep with the giant air con unit freezing her to death (the opposite to Bangkok). We did get a free bottle of water though.

We arrived at the nearest train station to Sapa at 6am and were driven up into the mountains for an hour. Once we reached the town we were surprised to be recieved as celebs by the local hill tribe people. We chatted about how nice it was that they didn't ask for any money, but were soon enlightened to the truth... We trekked for 10km in the fog and soon learned that the hill tribe women actually follow you up the mountain and help you along the way, holding your hand, literally. Harry's young helper gave Jen a few death stares when she dared to hold his hand too. Here we met Jess, Gill and Darren, who were our fellow trekkers/drinkers for the next few days. We stopped for lunch and learned the true intentions of the tribal women. 'We help you, you buy from me'. Again, Jen felt sorry for them and gave far too much away, and even started trying to teach the children good morals. Luckily, Darren flashed his police badge when the women got too rowdy. After a few water buffalo wondering by, and visiting a local school, we were invited into the home of the lovely Mr. and Mrs. Chin. They cooked all ten of us an amazing meal and sold us bottles of Vietnam's finest wine for a couple of dollars. Whilst waiting for dinner Wedge got the shock of her life when Mr. Chin rocked up on his motorbike with a live chicken on a piece of sring for our dinner, killing it next door a few minutes later. She wouldn't eat it. Harry on the other hand felt right at home, and grateful for fresh meat after his thirteen day Dheli Belly stint in India. After twenty shots of rice wine we were invited into the main house, and serenaded the extended family with that British classic 'My Heart Will Go On'.

The next morning we woke up (our heads laying next to an open window - i.e. no glass) to the beautiful sounds of the valley: running water, cockerals and the neighbors' dance music; apparently a retaliation. It was extremely hot and sunny which revealed a stunning view of terraced rice paddies for miles around. Wedge had her second panic attack on this day. We were trekking though a bamboo forest in a line, and she was at the back. She vowed not to pay any of the helper ladies so was completely devastated when she nearly fell down the mountain, hanging for dear life to a giant piece of bamboo, and one of the ladies literally saved her life - they're fricking strong. Of course she then had to give her a bit of cash, the woman did wash her face in a stream for her after all. Following a long trek back to Sapa, we headed back for the sleeper train. Extremely exhausted after 'such an authentic experiece' as we kept telling each other.