Hello Everyone!!

Alright so here it is. Finally. Apologies for not getting myself together sooner but Asia proved too manic to find the time to sit and type a suitable update. And then as my trip got longer the update needed to increase..and yeah so it became a catch 22. Still I now have the time as I'm unemployed in Sydney - eyyy!
So here it goes.

Left London with a free upgrade so the flight over was lovely. I did get stuck beside a woman who insisted I tell her the star signs of every single person I deemed important in my life so that she could compare against my own sign and inform me who I should marry/avoid. She also believed she could talk to the dead..Bangkok came as a relief! Arrived and met Pidge and Jade and then made our way to the hostel. We spent our next day looking around the royal palace and the temple of the emerald Buddha which was beautiful. Although I was expecting a massive Buddha statue the way everyone went on about it - but it was tiny! That night we caught a train up to Chiangmai and ended up meeting an Irish girl called Amy. We invited her to join us and we all got on so well she travelled with us all the way to Vietnam.

Chiangmai was cool. Ten times better then Bangkok. When we first arrived we were driven directly to our hostel which was situated in the old town; all tiny streets with a village feel to it. Only when we left that area later on that night did we realise how huge the city was. We had the impression it was this quaint little town! On our first night we decided to sign up for a cooking class which saw us being picked up and driven to the market where our teacher pointed out the various ingredients we'd be using. The heavens had decided to open by this point so most of the market tour was spent dashing from one tented area to another. After we were driven to the teacher's house where he had a massive kitchen set up for classes. All of us were given a stove and utensils and then followed him as he showed us the steps to creating a number of thai dishes. He taught us that when you try somebody's cooking you should always follow with the phrase,

'Unbelievable!'

That way whether its good or bad you've responded without upsetting the cook! At the end of one dish he went along the row to taste everyone's food. Arriving at my stove he stuck his spoon in and then opened his mouth twice. Once to eat and the second time to grin through the word....'UNBELIEVABLE!'

Needless to say it all went downhill from there. I was unofficially the class clown. Our last dish involved us pouring a large quantity of water onto boiling oil to create a massive fireball. When it was my turn I was so sure I would burn my face off that I flicked the wok too quickly away from myself throwing the contents of it all over the place! At this my teacher simply shook his head and walked away. No gold star for me!

On our second day we took a tuk tuk up a mountain to this temple where you could see for miles around followed by a trip to the zoo to see the new baby panda. Their giant panda had recently given birth and it was a big deal! National news coverage, postcards, banners..we had to go! We weren't able to actually see the mother and baby although we did watch a live feed however the father was out and about and we spent a good chunk of time observing him. He was a beauty!

After the zoo we went back down into town for "Monk Chat". On a certain day every week the local monks invite the public to come along for a couple of hours of conversation. They get to practice their english and we get to learn all we want about them. Whilst there we were split off into pairs and set down in a group of around 5 monks. Jade and I were together and spent most of our time discovering that our monks loved nothing more then girls, cars and football! Each week they have a football tournament and the winner receives a coke. The monk we chatted to was proud to state that his team won that coke every week!
Almost everyone there was from Cambodia and literally all were monks to benefit from the free education. Once they'd finished school and learnt basic english they planned to rejoin society, marry, move back to Cambodia and become tour guides. Smart move I say.
Jade and I also learnt that a Cambodian fave was the local cheese. Since we knew we'd be in Cambodia we asked what kind of milk it was made from so we could look out for it and try some.

'Milk?!' Our chatty monk stated bemused. 'There is no milk in the cheese.'
'Oh...'
'No we take the fish and we wait til its really old and then we beat it to pulp and press it together to make the cheese!'

Needless to say we didn't seek this cheese out!

The main reason everyone comes to Chiangmai is for the trekking that can be done in the jungle around there. We had signed up for a two day trek and early the next morning we all piled into a truck alongside a number of others to drive out of the city. Our first stop was a waterfall that only a few of us braved. The impact of the water was incredible and SO cold. After we climbed out of the water I realised that the force of the fall had caused a ridiculous amount of sand and grit to lodge itself in my swimming costume. There was no shower and I ended up washing myself down with the hose used to clean your bum!

Then we drove a while longer to these hot springs where only Jade, Amy and I managed to lower ourselves in fully. It was a surreal experience stewing in hot water whilst it was an impressive 30+ degrees simply standing on the bank! There was a group of lads in another tour group a little way up and they kept looking down to us girls with a mixture of disbelief and wounded pride that we were submerged and they barely able to dip in a toe. We're pretty sure we could see their brains turning over the thought - it must be cooler down there...

Once out of the water we dressed and set off into the jungle. We had been warned of leeches and decided that tucking our trousers into our socks and spraying our entire outfit with 100% deet was the way forward. (100% deet melted our shoes). Throughout the trek we were lucky. We saw the leeches moving towards us but we all escaped without a single bite. One of the other girls who had decided not to tuck her trousers in found a nasty one on her leg. (She quickly tucked them in after that!) Another guy had one on his neck!
For me personally it was the thought of snakes that kept me secretly terrified. The guide found out this fact and happily embarked on a game of suddenly scream and whack at the ground or tree or stop and point with a whisper of sssssssss. Despite knowing it was a lie I fell for it repeatedly. I couldn't help it! At one stage a giant spider dropped on my head and ran down my arm. Didn't bother me in the slightest! Give me a spider any day.

The trek itself lasted about 5 hours and was simply stunning. Being able to walk through a real jungle was truly amazing. We'd be walking and suddenly turn to find an open space with a view for miles around that demonstrated how isolated we were. The only signs of human life were the few villages we walked through. We stopped at a couple for a rest and were allowed to walk around to see the animals and the general set up. During our first stop one of our guides Toto took out his slingshot and gave us a chance to try and shoot some mangoes down. We didn't get any although I was impressed with how close I got - grazed the fruit and everything!

We eventually reached the village we were sleeping at drenched in sweat, mud and the remains of whatever bugs had tried to bite us. I have never sweated so much in my life! The "shower" was bliss. We slept in this hut on stilts and ate our meal in the communal area. Jade and Pidge had bought some frogs on sticks in town and the cook roasted them for us to have alongside our main meal. It really wasn't bad - like chicken that had a slight tinge to it! After the meal our other guide Chi Boon led us in some rhythm and number games with the losers forced to have the black fat from the cooking pot smeared onto their face. Starting off well I quickly descended into losing quite badly. My face was pretty much covered by the end! During all of this we were drinking beer whilst Chi Boon was casually sipping from his water bottle. Eventually we asked why he wasn't joining us for a drink. He grinned and handed us the bottle to sniff.

Yep. Moonshine. We all tried some. I had brought my playing cards out incase we fancied a game and had left them on a table earlier on in the evening. Some of the villagers had found them and taken them away to play. Toto told me they assumed they were a gift. I was happy to part with them for free. Still Chi Boon gave me a bottle of moonshine as payment.

Yes parents thats right your daughter traded a pack of cards for some homemade alcohol.

(Don't worry I didn't touch a single drop after that. We eventually left it in a hotel room in Hanoi.)

Eventually we all called it a night and headed to bed. Thats when the fun began! I woke up a few hours later with intense stomach pains. I knew I needed to get outside but my bed was towards the back of the hut and in the pitch black it took my awhile to find the door. I ended up crawling along and feeling the floor as walking saw me falling over everyone's beds. During this entire time I was heaving and on the verge of seriously offending somebody by vomiting on their bed! Made it outside and down the steps where I proceeded to lose the entire contents of my stomach. Then I went back to bed. This hilarious routine continued roughly every hour until dawn when I got up and sat outside. My body was telling me not to take anything but people convinced me to drink some water which I couldn't hold down. Toto whipped up a foul smelling mixture which he forced me to drink and which I later lost so violently it came out of my nose. After forcing me to drink yet another mixture and losing that he agreed I was right and shouldn't have anything and was instructed not to drink until late that night.

Easy. Save for the crushing heat of the jungle. By the end of that day my only thoughts revolved around ice/water/cold showers.

Our second day was luckily alot easier then the first with an elephant ride then bamboo rafting. (On a side note whilst everyone was having breakfast we suddenly heard a strange noise ringing. Only when one of the villagers actually picked up a mobile phone and answered did we realise. We were in the middle of NOWHERE and they have reception. What?!?)
The elephant ride would have been lovely. We trekked through the jungle and along the river for about an hour watching the baby elephant running and swimming alongside. However for me personally it wasn't enjoyable. I could barely sit upright and then watching the water run by....I was tempted just to let go and fall off into it in order to satisfy my thirst.

The bamboo rafting, however, was awesome! They made them from scratch each time they went down the river and it was just genius how well they worked. We were divided onto two rafts and spent two hours just cruising down the river, hitting the rapids, jumping off and swimming in the water. The scenery was incredible. I lay on the raft and let my skin soak up all the water running through! At one point everyone had jumped off into the water and one of the guides who didn't realise I was sick thought it'd be a good idea to chuck me in. Luckily Chi Boon, who later revealed his undying love for me - actually!, was on hand to jump in and save me.

The river journey eventually came to an end. We pulled up to a bank where I watched everyone have lunch and then we all drove back to town. I went straight to bed and the girls went for a night out with the tour guide Chi Boon and his friends. Seeing as he had his heart set on marrying me Chi Boon was disappointed at my absence! If I ever get stuck at least I know I can make my way back to Thailand.

The following morning we got up early to make our way by bus to a small Thai town where you can cross the border into Laos. We arrived at night and had to sleep in a place called 'Ghosthouse YES!'. I've slept in better places. Before bed we decided to take a stroll into town and see what was there. After 15 mins the only place we could see was a 7/11 supermarket type store. Asking a couple if there was anything further down the bridge they replied

'Nah not really. Nothing much. I mean there's a pub and stuff but... and there was some karaoke.'

We walked awhile down the road - the ten mins we were told was actually 20 to find the TOWN. We decided the couple we asked must just love small supermarkets. Who needs pubs and shops and clubs when you have a 7/11!?

An hour later we found ourselves in a field where a small stand had been set up alongside a few tables and chairs. On the stand you could sing your heart out. I hate karaoke with a passion. The girls love it and since I dislike missing out on anything we found ourselves on stage singing Kung Fu Fighting complete with kicks and bad dancing entertaining the one other couple that was there. Fun but lets never have to do it again please.

The next morning we were up early to cross the border and make our way to the slow boat which we would be taking for the next two days down the Mekong River to Luang Prabang.

More to follow. xox