There's two things you should know about Lake Taupo. First, the entire lake is basically a huge volcanic crater (the size of Greater London) created during a monstrous eruption some 27,000 years ago. When this baby blew up day turned to night as far away as China. This, along with a gale force wind and a swell to rival the Pacific, gave us food for thought as we sailed out in our replica 1920s launch. The Barbary takes a nosedive. The second thing to know about Lake Taupo is that it bit Ally something wicked. No sooner did we settle down on a bench on the left side of the boat than a huge wave came along to say 'hi!'. Ally might as well have taken a dip in the lake. Still, we could count ourselves lucky - at least the driving rain did not start until we got back on land and attempted to dry out Ally's clothes in the sun. One wave short of a ship-wreck In all the excitement the true purpose of the trip - to view the Maori rock carvings only accessible by boat - was largely forgotten. I can, however, inform you that dots along the nose mean the face in the rock is that of a chief, whereas stripes indicate a high priest. Huge waves plus a small boat, on the other hand, indicate you are about to get very wet. Anyway, the carvings were not nearly as entertaining as watching Errol Flynt's former yacht, Barbary, nearly disappear under the crashing waves. Plus, we appear to have been skippered by the only man brave (or crazy) enough to actually sail all the way to the carvings that day, as even larger vessels turned back half-way. Here be the High Priest