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Since I last wrote my blog I have become an advanced diver and have travelled through Colombia to a Caribbean isalnd off the coast of Nicaragua...so alot to catch up on!
I left off in Quito last where I had a couple of days partying and going out. I met alot of English people so naturally I stuck with them and before long I was involved in a pirate party, with my very own pen tatoos, and going to the cinema. I decided to travel to Colombia with some of them as I have been searching desperately for a travel partner for a very long time. We got the bus at 4:45 in the morning from Quito, having waited since 2am, and took and 21.5 hours bus ride to Cali, a city in the south of Colombia renowned for its beautiful women and plasdric surgery. As you can see it was a rather long bus ride and the air conditioning smelt of shrimp, which really didnt help. Much to my disappointment the Colombian border provided no excitement or thrills whatsoever however the countryside was incredibly beautiful: very barren rocky mountains.
We arrived in Cali at around 1 in the morning and booked into some rather dodgy looking hotel surrounded by transvestites, who turned out to be one of the highlights of Cali! The following day we went ot the zoo, supposedly the best in South America, and much to my surprise it actually lived up to its reputation, housing an assortment of creatures from all over the world including alot of anacondas. After an enjoyable time at the zoo it was off to the city centre (not recommended). There is absolutely nothing to see there but we did end up in a shopping mall full of incredibly good looking women. I couldnt quite believe my eyes but they were real alright...well real is probably the wrong word to use. That night we went out in Cali which is surpisingly safe. Colombia has a great atmosphere and feels alot safer than Ecuador. It is far more developed and the people are extremely friendly. They gave us beer in a huge tube which you have to pur out of the tap at the bottom so that was pretty original, and yes as expected the club was full of more plastics.
Before I went out that night I had my head shaved in our bathroom. It was a novel experience and I dont think my hair has been this short since the day I was born. Considering i hadnt cut my hair for 4 months it was a fair old job.Now with my new haircut and donning a wifebeater I popped off to the internet only to be sexually harassed by two ´´women´´ flashing all kinds of thinhs and saying they wanted my babies. They actually turned out to be extremely nice later on that night one of the English guys and I decided to brave hooker alley (very conveniently outside our hotel). Naturally enough it was fairly terrifying walking down a dark street surrounded by 30 ´´women´´ who were both taller than me and who had deeper voices. Having said that some of them have had so much surgery to change sex that one could quite easily be fooled, especially when seeing them from behind: they actually had better legs than most women! Luckily they turned out not to be the kind who rob you but instead dance in front of you and try all kinds of thinfs which I would prefer not engage in! Just to reassure, we did get out of there unscathed, unharmed and unviolated so alls well that ends well!
Having seen enough of what Cali had to offer I hopped on a bus to Bogota (the capital of Colombia). 12 hours and an army search against a bus later, I arrived in the old town in a hostal called Platypus. Luckily one of the English girls who i had met in Quito was there and had booked me a room. Bogota is a large city with 9 million people and with quite a few skyscrapers. I went out that night in the local area and must have been offered cocaine about 100 times but they are all very nice there. The next day i did a whistlestop tour of Bogota involving the Fernando Botero Museum (lots of paintings of fat ladies), the main Plaza de Simon bolivar and giong up the cable car to el montserrate, which had stunnnig views of the city, really stunning. Unfortunately the camera doesnt do it justice. that night I had green and pink spaghetti and went to bed.
Having seen Bogota i caught a flight to San Andres, which is a Caribbean island belonging to Colombia about 900km off the coast. It is only 120km from Nicaragua and very close to Jamaica as well, so it does feel extremely Caribbean. Firstly it is absolutely boiling here, really really hot, the beaches are typical tropical palm laden ones and the water is perfectly crystal clear and candy blue. There is alot of reggae and they all speak Creole (basically pigeon English) as well as Spanish. On arrival, a large German man called Werner picked me up on his moped and took me to my hotel. Wenrner is well over 50, very large and talks constantly about women whilst puffing away at cigarettes (he was my diving instructor). My hotel was run by the gayest man I have ever seen my life who led me into the room and subsequently said...ooooh how tasty. The next day i started my diving course. Over the last 5 days I did my PADI open water and Advanced course so all together I did 10 dives. I wont explain every single one, but the visibility is between 40 and 60m, the water temperature is 28 degrees and the deepest I went was 36.5m! I saw planty of eels, stingrays, fish (of course), lobsters, a turtle and flying fish. The flying fish were incredible and went faster than the boat, which was going at 35km/h. On top of the normal dives I did a drift dive in the current, underwater navigation, a deep dive and a beautiful night dive. The night dive was possibly the best and when we turned our torches off it was pitch black, silent and everywhere there were little bioluminescent plankton...a great sight! My afternnons consisted of beach bumming, eating alot and general talking to people. I met a really nice Swedish girl called Annie who i went out with twice as well. i have spent most of my lunchtimes on tiny tropical islands, having a beer with Werner between dives. Having succesfully completed my course my week culminated in a great night out (last night). I have been going to the same cafe for the past week and have got to know the owners so last night I went out with a 30yr old, a 37yr old and a 40yr old (all women). One of them has a child 4 years older than me! I had a great time with them, Colombian women are very nice indeed. Today they took me in the car on a trip around the island: saw a nice cave, did some tanning on some tropical beaches and went to a lake full of caiman! the 30yr old, called Soraya, probably the one I am closest to, showed me her laptop and on there I found photographs of Cambridge! She had been there 4 years ago and had photos fo parkers piece etc, I almost cried.
All in all, so far Colombia has been fantastic. friendly people, great weather, beautiful women...just a good time.
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