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JIM AND DONNA”S GUIDE TO SUNBATHING
So it has been just over a week since I last wrote a blog and like a heroin junkie I have been missing my fix of waiting for Donna to get ready, while sitting at a computer vomiting inane words onto the page, like a spring break teenager who has just discovered that free drinks all night really means free drinks all night.
The reason for the lack of blog action is a lack of material to write about. This is because for the last week we have been doing absolutely nothing. And when I say nothing, I mean nothing. Well actually, when I say nothing, I mean sitting by the pool all day doing nothing. Or occasionally sitting on the beach all day doing nothing but that’s all much of a muchness.
Some people might think it is a bit boring doing absolutely nothing for an entire week but it is really easy when you try. It is just about making those little decisions as important as possible. For example, today I lay in the sunshine on a very comfortable sun lounger on a beautiful beach with very nice waitress service attending to my every need and it took me over an hour to decide whether I was perfectly happy lying on my back or whether I should get up and readjust the sun lounger and lie on my front for a while. It really was a tough decision to make.
It is amazing how your body adjusts to doing nothing. Right now, I believe our bodies have entered hibernation mode, which means that we never seem to be very hungry, get quite tired lying around all day and comfortably sleep ten to twelve hours a night.
As I said, it is the little things that now occupy us. For most of our time in Mexico, I have been getting breakfast in. There is a French bakery just down the road that does fairly reasonable croissants and a Starbucks round the corner that does bagels with cream cheese and marmalade (which is surprisingly very good). I have gone from never having visited a Starbucks in my life to becoming a regular in a very short space of time. Could I be the only non-coffee drinking Starbuck regular in the world? Possibly.
So to make a change, yesterday I asked Donna: For a change shall we go out for breakfast rather than getting cream cheese and marmalade bagels or French croissants in? Her answer was that it was a good idea but could she have a bagel first to line her stomach while she was gets ready. I tried to explain that that would make it lunch rather than breakfast.
So the decision each day of whether to hang around the pool or go to the beach is a tough one. Both have their advantages. For example, the pool is very close to our room, which means we don’t have to go very far, but the beach has the sea (as those who have ever been to a beach know). I have rather taken to the sea. I like the waves. I like floating up and down in the water, watching the waves come in, never knowing until the last minute whether they are going to be a big one that will go over your head or just a gentle bop up and down. It is very exciting.
It has made me think a lot about waves. Because in science, particularly in physics, they think so many things move in a wave motion, like light waves and sound waves and particle waves and whatnot. I cannot help thinking that most of modern science thinking was thought up by a bunch of scientists on a beach holiday who needed something to justify their expenses at the last minute.
Sorry, if that is a bit scientific. How about comparing the waves coming in to all your problems in life. Like, at any one time, you always see this big problem on the horizon, like a big wave and you wonder how you will ever surmount it but then it reaches you and you gently float over the top of it and wonder what all the fuss was about. Then you see the next wave and you never learn because you still wonder how you will get over it.
Or on a more basic level still, why is it when you go in the sea to go for a wee, your body always constrict and stop you going just as a wave hit, so you have to concentrate hard and push it out in the calm sea in-between which is quite pressured and hard work and you are really pleased when you manage it.
So yesterday, I was walking along the street (probably to get Donna a bagel) and some local tout tried to sell me weed or coke; quite a common occurrence down the main strips. What struck me this time is that a few moments before the same bloke had tried to sell the older couple in front of me a trip to some ruins. It made me a bit chuffed that I still look young enough to pass for someone who would prefer to take drugs than go to see some ruins. Even though, the trip to the ruins actually sounded quite good and I might have been tempted.
Donna persuaded me to buy some short shorts from a gay swimwear shop in town yesterday to help me fit in with the locals. I am still trying to persuade her to buy a thong bikini in exchange. When wearing the new shorts to the beach yesterday, it meant I had a virgin strip of flesh at the top of each leg that has not seen sunshine for about 37 years. Despite the excessive amounts of factor eight I applied, I have still managed to burn the tops of my legs quite badly, which has made me think two things. Firstly, I feel sorry for white people who are not lovely and brown like Donna and me, they really have a tough time. Secondly, bad sunburn on the inner thigh chafes a lot.
See a whole blog about nothing at all.
Lots of love
Jim and Donna
PS For those who are wondering, I decided to stay on my back for a bit longer. Given the sunburn to the front of my legs, this was probably the wrong decision
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