Oh I forgot to mention...it seems goats here also get some major dangleberry action. I saw one goat which I knicknamed "clinky" because that was the noise his dried dangleberries made when he ran. For those who have just eaten...my sincerest apologies! Jon "the adopted Kiwi" Apples...over and out!

Hey Zane, you are my number 1 IDOL. Thanks for the message and for mentioning the dangleberries and cling ons. For those who were wondering, a cling on IS THE SAME as a dangleberry! I know Zane learnt something out of all this. Yes I will tell Hayley all about Pavlova being OZZY. The kiwi fruit does make it look nice too but we can't really thank the kiwi;s for those. I mean really, stealing Chinese Goosberries and re-naming them is a bit cheeky don't you think. It's like if Australia renamed Strawberries as Ozberries! I guess I'm a hypocrit though really as my name is Jonny Apples...hehe.

Well hope you're still having a ball over there and I do hope Smartlink don't take you seriously and fire Utku's arse. We all know he is the Guru of all Guru's. Well if you do get fired Utku, I know another 426 companies that will hire you (yes I counted).

Heidi and I are hoping (small chance) to pick up some work in UK/Europe in about 6 months time. We'll see what happens here of course but we think we'd like to check out that side of the world before settling back to Melbourne. Besides, what better time to do it when we know so many people over there. Let's just hope we can find some work over there and that you guys don't come back in the meantime!

Party on Dude. Be excellent to each other. Jonny Apples....signing out!

It looks as if I've left this too long and now I have s*** loads of messages to respond to... that'll teach me! Here goes...

Firstly congratulations to Kerrie & Brendan on finally finding a house you want to call home AND more importantly the news that I will have yet ANOTHER cousin. Nice work! How old am I going to be to this one!!! By the way, I don't mind sharing my birthday... Christmas is for everyone, especially those lucky (or unlucky) enough to be born on the same day! :)

Jonny Apples... my biggest fan. I know you'll probably read this first so to you a big hello! Thanks for the sheep lessons. Glad to see your not wasting your time in New Zealand. Just look out for those cling ons, dangleberries and dags! Basically as a rule, just avoid all sheep poo altogether. Some things never change, well other than you becoming a DAD!!! Bet you're doing a great job, just remember to tell Hayley that Pavlova is an Australian creation and that it only has kiwi fruit on it for colour!

Marcin, hopefully I'm not too late. When do you come to London next? We'll definitely have to hook up. Did I tell you I'm going to do GAS (Germany, Austria and Switzerland)? Not sure when but definitely before I head home (whenever that will be). I'll probably have to do it on my own cos Lew is still without his passport and I don't know when/if he'll get himself sorted. Anyway mate I'll drop you line via e-mail just in case you don't read this.

Kelz, hope you liked your birthday present. I went to a lot of trouble to make sure it arrived on time (although it didn't!) mainly cos of the terrible post office queues here and also cos I knew you would never let me hear the end of it if I'd forgotten (which is probably why you reminded me constantly!)

Seb, now that I've started your web site it's probably about time I finished it, sorry. If you want to send me some content that will help. Otherwise I'll just add a contact page and spread what I have over a couple of other pages. Hope your renovations are going to plan.

Ducky or Simmo or SIMDOG or whatever you go by these days. Stop scaring away the customers! You know my grandma and brothers read this stuff. Nah, just kidding, be yourself, they can handle it. Besides, that's part of what makes you a fun, colourful character and your messages so damn funny to read. I miss ya big guy! By the way, Squirrelpig is some made up name this crazy northern guy at work used to hide his identity. He cracks me up. He's been calling me "new kid" since I arrived and probably will for as long as I'm here. Oh and he also enjoys yelling at people on the phone to "Fook Off!!!", all in his thick northern accent. So many characters here at Mute! "King of Love Mountain", well that was one of the many random SMS messages I sent over the weekend of Glastonbury. I can't explain it, just as I can't expect you to understand it! What a weekend though... but I'll save that for my next well overdue postcard.

Weasel, well what a surprise to see you're name on this list. Got your e-mail too, thanks, you're a champion. You should move over here! London is just like Geelong, but with less ford utes! Oh that's right, you have a dog to look after now so no travel for you. Hey, what's with everyone getting married and becoming dog owners? Next it'll be kids! :P

Yo! SmartLink freaks!!! You've probably forgotten about me by now but just so you know, I haven't forgotten about you guys. I still check the web site occasionally to see what's happening but very little has changed by the looks of things? Maybe that's a compliment? Or you guys should fire the guy that maintains that web site, he's useless! Just kidding Utku. Hey man, a few of us are organising a trip to Turkey for a couple of weeks next year around ANZAC day so see if you can get Tony and Barb to give you some time off around then. It would be AWESOME if you could meet me there. I know it's ages away but it's better to be ready early. I'll let you know details when I know more. Nick, I'm sorry I didn't visit Jo, although in my defence it was only a short stop in that bustling city of "Milton Keynes" - boring! Hope you're all well.

Daryl, I thought Perth was supposed to have beautiful weather all year round? That's the impression I have from all the photos I've seen of you and the family visiting over there. Beautiful weather here at the moment but I won't rub it in much cos come your summer I'll be slipping ass over tit on the icy footpaths of London!

Philip, once again you've out done yourself! I forwarded your Glastonbury review to my fellow festival frolicking friends and they were also well impressed. You are the wittiest word smith we know, without a doubt! Send Grandma my love and thank her for sending me yet another beautifully crafted HAND WRITTEN letter.

Dad... if you want to get away and you're up for it then come over and visit me. I'll show you around London and we can go nuts with all the touristy things I should have already done by now! Maybe we could go to Ireland or Scotland? Just an idea. I'm thinking of you.

To everyone else, especially the rest of my family, take care and I miss you! Hope to hear from you all soon, love Zane.

Hi zane, how you going. I am bored on a cold sunday morning. To all you crow fans, how goes your 141 point defeat. Also zane your team would win the final if it were played at the dome, pity it isn't so they won't. Hope you having fun. Smell you later.

Hey dudes, it was wet, it was weird. Here's the review. Glastonbury would not be the same without Caravans, a band that has carried the festival scene since its heyday and always with the same three chords. It's hard to believe that Caravans, a hippie throwback with hiphop pretensions could be the inspiration for Tents, but then it's not often that a group comes along that only does covers. My hit pick, Hiding in the Flowers, did not disappoint, one of the few bands at Glastonbury that could get its message across without resorting to musical instruments. Most of the bands used musical instruments this year, a sometimes tedious accompaniment to what are otherwise perfectly decent human beings. Magic Mirror on the Pole are stuck with the pop schtick: love it or leave it! It's certainly fun though to watch a band with their feet planted firmly in outer space. Surprise act of the festival had to be Casualties of War, an ugly combo made up of leftovers from Grey Mud. Heavy metal meets greased back hair. It's a long way to the top, especially if you are a member of the introvert band Teepees. This band performs incognito in Indian rawhide accommodation, proof that painful shyness is no obstacle to becoming tomorrow's show biz sensation. You wish. The Everly Brothers copyists Me & Paul were more cute than crafted, though the name of the group is an unsubtle reminder of who really formed the Beatles. By the time the headline act, The Summit of Love Mountain, hit the main stage some of us were ready to crash: U2 Mk2 is one U2 too many. See you next year!

Hi Zane - just gone through 2 weeks of rain and now the cold. 0.6 degrees in Perth today and expecting a few more cold days. Good that you seeing more of the world. St kilda lost again but they are doing better then Richmond so be happy they will still be in the finals. Hope you are well and continue to enjoy your travels.

Hi Zane, your message board must be keeping you pretty entertained. You are definately not missing out on the goss. Just dropping a line to let you know that you are going to have another little cousin. Yes I am pregnant. And what is more it could arrive on your birthday!! So you may not be the only one that feels that you are missing out. Brendan and I are finalising our plans for the house we bought so we can do a few renovations before we move in. Still pretty attached to St Kilda, but at least we can keep it a bit longer as Flick and Ben are going to move in. It is bloody freezing over here. I am sure it is warmer over there than here. You may want to work on your tan. Love Kerrie and Brendan

Just been reading the message board and what can I say????? What the f*** have you guys been doing? Always good to see and hear a few stories from you. As for Geelong, same s*** different day. Bout to move offices, back out to sunshine. I better upgrade the windows with bullet proof glass. Also bought a dog the other week, Rufus, border collie X Scotch collie, not a bad little puppy, the cats arent real happy at the moment but they will get over it.

apart from that just pissing around the house and going out accaisionally. Going to see Gomez tomorrow night, Tuesday, so can't wait for that, also going to see "The Streets" next month when they get out here.

Anyhow you are probably bored by now of reading this crap so i will let you go. Have a beer or 6 for me.

catchya

Howdy, King Of Love Mountain. Been a bit a quiet lately!! What's with the new monniker and it doesn't suprise me one bit that you know someone called squirrelpig. Crazy!!! Kinga can I get a tip for the Euro's, being that it's now Portugal, Greece or the Czech's(how good was Maniche's goal. Crazy...). To Johnny Apples congrats on a little bundle of joy hope everything is going well for you and the two special ladies in your life. Take care Zano and everyone O/S.
Cheers Simdog...

A MESSAGE TO ALL OF ZANES CHUMS:

HE NOW WISHED TO BE KNOWN ONLY AS *************** THE KING OF LOVE MOUNTAIN *************

Giday Zane, Fancy going all the way to Milton Keynes and not seeing my daughter Jo. She is engaged now and returns to Australia in 1 month. She and Cameron have been working there for close to 3 years. Keep havimg fun. Smartlink continues to prosper and everyone here is fit and well. Take care. Rehards Nick

Hello everybody! How you boys are doing alright over there!
Just did my course on OHS, oh yeah. Now i can tell people what to do. Oh yeah!
Smell you later.