December 1, 2006 -- Back in Bangkok, Thailand after 2 incredible weeks in Cambodia and Laos.

"Naked Elephant Bathing"

North of the chaos of Bangkok, lies the town of Kanchanaburi, sight of Hellfire Pass along the infamous Burma-Thailand Railway. The vulnerability of the critical sea-lanes between Singapore and Rangoon during the second World War forced the Japanese to construct a railway, 415 kilometres long, through impenetrable jungle and mountains using a multi-national workforce of Allied soldiers and local Asian labourers totalling 250,000.  The horrific conditions and brutality suffered at the hands of the Japanese forces were made famous in the classic, "Bridge Over the River Kwai".  More than 100,000 souls lost their lives during the construction -- the winding rail a lasting tribute to the enduring spirit of survival under the worst of odds, and a haunting reminder of the evils of man under the auspices of war.

Luckily, our 3-day excursion to Kanchanaburi contained more than sobering visits to war memorials and graveyards -- after all, the area is rich in culture, pristine wilderness and incredible fauna, the latter of these giving us an afternoon we'll never forget.

For those of you with any SE Asia stamps in your passport, you'll recall that "elephant trekking" is readily available on most excursions into the wild.  Unfortunately, many of these treks are little more than what you might find at a local fair or circus back home -- a depressed captive elephant trudging along a worn path, chains dangling while a guide whips the "beast" into submission.  Its easy to come away feeling somewhat cheated -- the exotic notion of riding bare-backed on a wild elephant reduced to merely another stop on another sterile, packaged tour.  That is, unless you opt to go "elephant bathing" -- which changes the parameters altogether. 

A saddled elephant in chains possesses a certain sadness -- a sense of defeat that is evident in every movement -- its weary eyes the most tell-tale sign of all.   An elephant on its way to the river -- to bathe -- sees a miraculous change in personality. 

Free of the saddle and the torturous trainer, we rode barebacked on our own Asian elephants towards the River Kwai -- our grey steeds almost skipping as we approached the sandy bank.  Elephants love the water -- the pristine jungle and mountains providing the perfect backdrop for what would be a wild and crazy ride. Almost immediately, Natalie's elephant ran into the water, the swift current no match for the massive hulk.  The water was deep, and the elephant quickly and without warning, submerged -- only Nat's head visible above the water.  Like a dog the elephant shook its head and body, Nat held on to anything she could find - the massive ears and bristle-like hairs the only viable options.  When the elephant surfaced, both were half-naked -- the bottom half of their swim trunks all that remained.  This R-rated aquatic circus routine repeated itself three more times to the delight of the local guides -- who themselves seemed to taunt the elephants into deeper dives and more abrupt dance moves.  I could barely contain myself.

My elephant was slightly older and cautious until it hit the water.  Almost immediately, I found myself half-submerged on what felt like an angry whale.  With an incredible show of pure strength and agility, my elephant rose on its hind legs like a horse and then submerged with a violent shake of its massive head -- my insignificant body thrown face-first into the middle of the river.  When I surfaced, I could see a huge eye watching as I was swept downstream.  I could see the happiness in its eyes -- for 30 minutes he was wild again -- and I was as insignificant as the chain around his foot.  

M & N 

Happy belated b-day Nat!  I hope you had a great day and a fabulous New Year's Eve!

Can't wait to see you in Mexico!

So Nancy and I are doing the cruise thing to the Bahamas last week (we all can't be Matt & Nat) and on the last day, an old couple asks if they can join us. Sure they're "blue hairs" but being that we really don't have full page warm & fuzzy saving a dog from drowning story or a let's give out "lottery goats" to a need tribe tale, we decided to be like the Provosts and create our own lasting memory of our trip..... She's got to be in her mid 80's, he's every bit of 90 and we come to find out they're from New Mexico, home of our very own Joe Edward.                                                                                                         
We ask how they like the cruise, they ask how we did. I run and get granny and grampa some oatmeal and fruit so they don't have to fight the mass of people compelled to eat as much food as possible before exiting the ship. 
We ask what they did (which wasn't much). They ask what we did and we tell them about our snorkling adventure, our tour around St Thomas and our bike riding adventure around Half Moon Cay where Nancy wiped out on her bike but was okay.
So get this, after hearing that Nancy bit it, granny remarks.... "That's why I haven't got on a bike in 20 years. I'd be worried that if I did fall off, some "wet-back" would run me over!"
Obviously, the jet-black hair and dark brown skin of my "Wet-back" wife sitting to granny's left must have escaped her. Nancy had about a 10-second lapse where she really can't account for the loss of time or what was said immediately after that. But she joined back in their conversation shortly thereafter, realizing that that's just the way they are and at this late point in their lives, it will never change.
We said good-bye after breakfast and wished them good luck. They moved pretty quickly through the crowd at that point, probably not wanting to be late for their "Clan" meeting.

I feel as though I've won the lottery in being selected one of the lucky few who will accompany you two on the concluding leg of this round the world excursion.  Do you have any special requests that you'd like for me to bring?  No - you can not request that I leave my sense of humor - if that's what you want to call it - at home.  See you in two short days!

Hi Guys,

Totally enjoying your adventures thru your pictures and words. We even think we saw the  black rhino in one of the pictures!!! We are working with Brian here at CHOP, and he forced us to the computer to look at your pics. But we are really loving them.

Good luck, safe travles home and have a great Holiday Season!!!

Hola chicos!!

Bueno me alegra saber que estan muy bien y disfrutando de sus largas, largas, largas vacaciones :o) Nosotros ya regresamos de nuestra honey moon y ya estamos viviendo en nuestra casa. I will be on vacations in a couple of weeks, God willing.

Unfortunately, I lost my job at one of the schools I've working since 2002! It wasn't MY fault it was just a "legal" move from one of my "colleagues". Anyway, we're doing ok and hoping to see U soon!

Take care!

Raul y Ale 

November 18th -- Siem Reap, Cambodia

"Halloween in the Himalayas"

When circumnavigating the globe, your ability to embrace and respect other cultures will surely make or break your trip. From dancing with Incas in Peru to sleeping with goats in Africa, our cultural escapades can fill volumes. Yet after nearly 13 months on the road and 37 countries under our belts, one can grow weary of the cultural tsunami we're riding across the planet. So we beg the question: how does one maintain cultural tolerance while preserving their own culture and identity -- even spread a tradition or two to some far-off land? Enter Natalie.

For those of you who haven't celebrated a holiday with Natalie yet, the following story gives you glimpse into her obsession with anything resembling a holiday.

Its mid-November, 2005, and Nat and I are camped deep inside one of Utah's National Parks -- we literally have the world before us and Nat turns to me with a twinkle in her eye, "I think I know what I'll be for Halloween". Yes, holiday planning in our household starts a year in advance. I refer to her as the costume-nazi; if its uncomfortable, immobile and takes more than a week to make, you can rest-assured its on her short list of costumes. Yet this year was different -- as we approached one of Natalie's favorite holidays -- Halloween -- we were without a plan and without a definitive costume. Natalie began to panic like a drowning swimmer struggles for air -- it was her mission, regardless of where, how and with whom -- to make Halloween 2006 a memorable one.  She never disappoints.

So here we were, in Calcutta of all places, searching for a Halloween costume.  Halloween is less than 24 hours away and Nat is just about to go off the deep end - for the first time in her life, she's ill-prepared for a holiday.  Luckily, we were in a place that just might hold the record for per capita tailors - each dropping their already laughable prices to 'almost-free" levels to attract business.  When we explained our plight to the nearest tailor, he laughed out loud.  Its not every day a foreign couple enters his shop asking for a bright orange Indian jumpsuit with a huge, black jack-o-lantern face stitched across the front.  Within 1.5 hours, Nat had her costume and I had my wife back -- her evil twin sister now back in hiding until Thanksgiving.  Normally, Nat's Halloween costume costs $100+ in materials plus at least 5 days hard labor.  This year, her hand-made authentic Indian jack-o-lantern cost the equivalent of $6.  Of course we grossly overpaid - yet what our tailor doesn't know is that Nat would have mortgaged our future or sold me to pay for the outfit.  Who's laughing now, Mr Tailor?

My costume was easy -- if you're a bald, tan, skinny (read Dehli belly) and travelling in India around Halloween you have but one choice for a costume - yes, you guessed it - Gahndi.  Finding a simple cotton cloth was the easy part, figuring out how to wrap the damn thing around your waist, crotch, torso and shoulder (and make it stay there) is another story altogether.  5 helpful locals later, I felt violated and ready for Halloween.

The next morning we flew from Calcutta to Bagdogra, and then hired a jeep to take us the rest of ther way to Darjeeling - a 4-hour arduous journey through some of the most breath-taking mountain scenery on the planet.  Tea plantations blanketed the steep slopes while old-growth forests clung to the hillsides --the green so deep and penetrating you could smell it in the air.  Native people -- short, stout and with more Asian features than their countrymen down the hill --carried their woven baskets of tea and children up the mountain; a "toy locomotive" -- inaugurated in 1885 and one of the last steam engines of its kind, chugged and hissed its way around the treacherous turns parallel to the road.  As you enter town, you catch a glimpse of the snow-covered Himalayas on the horizon - the world's highest peak looking down from its perch.  The road to Darjeeling is a journey back in time - truly unforgettable.

We arrived after dark and made our way to our hotel -- another Raj-era relic on the precipice of a cliff overlooking the town and the Himalayas.  We were the first and only guests in days -- and the attentive staff struggled to provide first-rate service with 3rd class facilities.  Time can wreak havoc on a wooden building -- yet this place screamed history and had a sense of charm like no other place in town.  And it was all ours.

So, after an all-day journey, we donned our Halloween costumes for a night on the town.  We emerged from our hotel into the busy market and town square in full costume -- locals stared and gasped, pointed and laughed.  Nat, between giggles, yelled "Happy Halloween" to passersby -- literally, stopping commerce as we strolled down the alley.  Hungry and anxious for a celebratory drink, we stopped at a high-end restaurant - the room going silent as Nat stepped across the threshold - her bright orange, pillow-stuffed jack-o-lantern smiling back at everyone in the room.

Nat was the star that night, as she is every night involving a costume;  I didn't draw a second glance (in my defense, everyone looks and dresses like Gahndi in India so I was just one dark-skinned pacifist among a billion).

Unfortunately, the entire town was asleep by 10:00PM so our Halloween celebration was short and sweet.  But that didn't matter -- Natalie got to wear her costume and was the first to bring Halloween to the Himalayas -- we hope to return someday to see if it the tradition sticks.

M & N

Okay..... so Poore and I were @ Baja Fresh today and BTSL was there looking through a Christmas magazine ordering....... T-Shirts. Looks like she's shelving Winnie The Pooh and the White Tiger for "I'm With Stupid" and Elroy Jetson.

Poore still always gets his food after everyone else's comes, no matter how much sooner he ordered his. It's so much the norm that we don't even give him a hard time about it anymore. 

That's it dude, nothing else really. Drop me a line off line and we'll chat.

Ron

matt and nat,

first happy halloween and happy birthday!!!!!!!  second,  i cant imagine the emotions you have both experienced just in the last two weeks let alone in the last 13 months.  to say that this trip is once in a lifetime is  just plain silly.  this trip is a lifetime!!!!  your experiences could fill hundreds of peoples lives!!  but now thanks to your trip and your talent and diligence in keeping this journal i can experience your trip from afar.  unbelievable.   and natalie,  a 15  page poem about matt and the trip........talk about talent and devotion.  you two must write a book!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    hope to see you if you travel through the east coast before heading home or whenever you will be here !!!!!!!!!!!  looking forward to the rest of your trip!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

November 8, 2006 -- Koh Samui, Thailand --

"Jesus Year"

On a day reserved to celebrate life, we opted to provide comfort and dignity in death.  October 27th marked my 33rd birthday -- my so-called Jesus Year, as Nat likes to call it -- a day that started like all others, yet ended in an uncontrollable display of emotion, satisfaction and warmth that will resonate forever inside.  Instead of birthday cakes, presents and favors themed "all about me", we tested the opposite side of the spectrum and gave "all of us" to someone else.  We all know the sacrifice and vision of the saintly, Mother Teresa -- her lifelong commitment to the poorest of the poor in Calcutta continues even today, some 10 years after her death.  Her many charities are distributed throughout the filth, chaos and congestion known as Calcutta -- all are branches of the institution known simply as "Mother House".   We walked into Mother House not knowing what, where or how -- we left different people altogether.  Of all the charities under the MH umbrella -- orphans, cripples, mentally-challenged, destitute -- we chose Kalighat, the Home for the Dying.  

The sisters of Mother House start their day early -- 5:30AM mass followed by breakfast.  We arrived for the latter and soon thereafter were on a local bus to Kalighat.  Our minds raced as we had no idea what was in-store for the day.  Upon arrival, we were awstruck. The penetrating, acrid smell of disinfectant on human excretions fill the wards where lie the emaciated, skin-and-bone inmates, their screams and painful moans echoing in the cavernous former temple.  The inmates are the desperately poor, the discarded, the unwanted -- victims of malnourishment, terminal illness and worse;  these are the so-called "untouchables" of Calcutta, their twisted bodies now aligned in neat rows while the sisters of Mother House and, on this day, two wide-eyed American tourists provide a place of comfort and repose in their final days.  The men and women have seperate quarters, so Natalie and I were seperated from the start.  Without any guidance, newbies are told to help where needed.  So, donning a green and white smock, surgical gloves and mask, I proceeded to pace the rows -- invalids reached for me -- for help -- with their knarled hands; others crawled past me on all fours, others simply stared at the ceiling, their respirations forced and shallow.  It was bathtime for all the patients, and I soon found myself on the front-lines.  A small washroom with 4 tiled "seats" and sinks filled with cool water -- room for 4 patients at a time.  Other volunteers carried the invalids to me while the capable waited patiently -- naked -- in the doorway, their skin-and-bones almost transparent while the sun shined through a window on their backs.  Two hours prior I thought I would be put to work washing dishes or scrubbing a floor -- and now, I'm coordinating the wash effort and bathing grown men, some unable to control their bodily functions as they shivered uncontrollably under my sponge.  At first, the scene nearly brought me to tears -- I choked up more than once before bringing myself together -- and then it happened.  Amidst the crawling bodies and haunting moans, the smell of death and dying, came the sound of laughter -- a man who had had a massive stroke, was taking his first steps in 4 years.  He has overcome with joy.  Joy.  In a place so desperate and appaling a few hours before, I now saw hope and happiness.  An hour later, after helping this same man flex his shriveled arm and leg and walk across the room, he grabbed my arm and pulled me with suprising strength close to him.  "You are my brother, I love you", he exclaimed with a gracious half-smile.  As it turns out, he was an english teacher prior to the stroke -- with no family, work or formal welfare to rely upon, he was tossed out into the street like trash.  Never again will we complain about the "problems" of American healthcare or what we don't have.  Our glass is certainly full.

Natalie was having a similar experience on the other side of the room -- hand feeding (with her fingers) a blind woman or assisting with the change of dressings for a woman who had a festering wound the size of a dinner plate from been eaten by rats on the street -- unable to react due to malnutrition and illness.  

One may think that Mother Teresa's Home for the Dying is a place of last resort, for the terminal.  Yet, more than 50% of those who enter "on their deathbeds" walk back into the unforgiving streets of Calcutta with hope.

Later that night, Natalie suprised me with a 15-page poem of our around-the-world journey for my birthday present.  An expression of talent, love and devotion that only I could truly understand.  The day's emotions burst to the surface as I cried uncontrollable tears of joy.  What an incredible birthday it was.

 M & N

Matty and Nat- We miss you guys. How have you been? I talked to Will this summer after he visited you and it sounded like you guys were having fun. When do you come home? Things have been going well here. I've booked a few acting jobs since you left and Mark and the Band finished there demo and have been playing a lot. We did a special Haloween night show at Silverlake lounge. That was cool. Mark moved to Agora Hills. Carrie and I are still in Echo Park. I was in a Pirate movie. Straight to DVD but still cool. I played a pirate. Zach Swartz came to visit. We saw him in January. It was great to catch up. He has a daughter and another on the way. Be sure to get in touch when you get back to the states. Take care - Jami