Never ask the Germans to decide territorial disputes. This rule is hopefully typed and pinned above the British Foreign Secretary's office door in Whitehall.

Many years ago (I say that because I can't remember the date!) Britain and the United States nearly went to war over the ownership of the San Juans, a jumble of islands between mainland Washington, the Olympic Peninsula, British Columbia and Vancouver Island.

The dispute kicked off when a pig owned by the British Hudson Bay Company was shot after breaking out and raiding a farm, and the farmer refused to be tried by the British, seeking protection from the United States.

Personally I think this is as good a reason as any to go to war, I remember from history lessons that Britain went to war with Spain after a British Sea Captain had his ear cut off by a Spaniard in the West Indies (The War of Jenkins Ear 1739-1742). George Dubya would have probably had more public sympathy for the Iraq war had he claimed Saddam was cruel to donkeys.

Anyway, to avoid war the German Kaiser, Wilhelm the Totally Mad, was asked to adjudicate and (now this will be a big surprise for all Brits reading this) he gave the islands to the Americans, a very early example of the Germans being good Europeans!

I guess we shouldn't complain, somewhere prior to this argument the Spanish had settled the islands (hence the name!) but were shoved out, and the Native Americans who lived, and still live there, probably feel they have more of a right to it anyway!

None of this has any relevance to this blog except that it places the San Juans in history and on the map, squashed between Canada and the USA on the Pacific coast. We nearly got to these islands 5 years ago with our good friends Jim "flying sure scares the sh*t out of me" & Linda "soya latte de-caff" Armstrong from Santa Barbara.

In addition to being all-round nice guys Jim & Linda happen to own a 4 seat Beechcraft Bonanza light aircraft, so we have enjoyed some fantastic and exclusive fly-in fly out holidays around New Mexico, Utah, Colorado and Wyoming with them.

The San Juans were scheduled on our last trip together until the weather deteriorated in Wyoming and forced us back to California. Angela can still remember the pleasure of flying just above the ground and slightly below the clouds in mountain passes on the way out of Jackson Hole. (If you are reading this guys, we are available for future flying holidays at very short notice, just give Angela enough time to swallow 40 valium please)

This time our arrival was slightly less salubrious, we drove to Anacortes, the "gateway" to the San Juans, in our G6 Pontiac hire car! After checking the price of accommodation on the San Juans we realised the islands were going to remain a mystery unless we could sell Jim & Linda's plane without them realising it!

Fortunately, the resident killer whales for which the islands are rightfully famous, can be found using boats out of Anacortes. The next morning was perfect for the trip so after handing over double the published price thanks to that old favourite "fuel surcharge," we joined over one hundred other tourists for a trip with Captain Mark and crew to see the Orcas.

You can't say killer whales anymore by the way; they've hired a PR company to improve their image. The Expensive Willy (think about that one) PR company would like to point out that Orcas have never knowingly eaten humans except when hungry, and that if they do eat you they are extremely sorry but, despite a sonar system that can detect a single sardine 5 miles away, they mistook you for a half ton elephant seal.

A mere 20 minutes out of harbour Capt Mark came over the 'com to announce that transient Orcas had been spotted nearby. Typical, a $180 outlay and we get to see the local dossers instead of one of the 3 resident pods. Our on board naturalist, whose voice rose higher than Minnie Mouse when she spotted the whales, introduced us to Lionel, the large male, as he surfaced far enough away to make me wish for a 500mm lens.

Actually his name wasn't Lionel, I'm making it up, but I've clean forgotten what his name was and he doesn't know it anyway, so no one is offended. Minnie Mouse recognised the whale, sorry Orca, by the marks on his 6.5ft long dorsal fin and back. I forget the rest of his statistics, except to say that he was much bigger than that plastic Great White shark in Jaws. Swimming with Lionel were a female and calf.

Those of you expecting Orca details at this point will be disappointed or relieved; Minnie Mouse was speaking fast American so we couldn't keep up!

One fact I do remember is that transients eat seals and sealions (but only because they have no choice, clarification courtesy of Expensive Willy PR) whereas the resident Orcas eat salmon. Perhaps the local Orcas have learnt to use a tin opener?

Another fact I remember is that the resident Orcas and transients don't socialise much, apparently the locals are too chatty for the transients, who obviously appreciate a bit of peace and quiet as they sneak up on their prey.

We watched the transient whales hunting around some small islands where seals and their pups were sensibly hauled out. Sadly for Angela and I, but fortunately for the PR consultants and the parents of impressionable ankle biters on board, we didn't get to see Lionel and his girlfriend tail lobbing half dead seal carcasses at each other.

Captain Mark kept reminding us how lucky we were to find Orcas so quickly and so close to Anacortes with so little steaming time, but didn't feel the need to return our fuel surcharges despite it doubling the published price!

Still, we felt good, we had reasonable views of the Orcas and we got a complimentary rubber one (fortunately not life sized) to stick on our car aerial. It certainly beat our last encounter with an Orca at Seaworld, I haven't forgiven that one for getting me soaking wet in an unseasonably cold Florida!

From Anacortes we retreated to Bellingham, the ferry "gateway" to Alaska. Have you noticed how many places are "Gateways", "Undiscovered", "Quiet Gems" and my personal favourite "Best Kept Secret in…..?" In other words you only find it because you are either lost or on the way to somewhere else!

So what were we doing in Bellingham, apart from trying to get a cheaper motel room? You've guessed it, we were waiting to get on the ferry to Alaska!