I'm going to write a letter of complaint to Oz Experience. They should have onboard psychotherapists. I feel like s***. Noosa was a bit of a f***ing none event. Spent yesterday wandering around aimlessly, looking at overpriced stuff and considering my next move. Got to Rainbow Beach this afternoon feeling f***ing dire. I should really have addressed all these issues before I came out here. North of sydney has been a bit of a disappointment in terms of things to see. I'm not as blown away as I thought I'd be. I suppose the fact that I feel like this and the weather has been s*** hasn't really helped. I miss my friends (yes, you) and my family and my dogs. I miss Grandad like crazy and I wish that Nicola was here with me which sounds ridiculous seeing as I was so intent on coming out here. Its at times like these when you start thinking of absurd situations, putting yourself in imaginary predicaments to see how your mind would cope. Why the f*** do I do that? Its a similar feeling to how I felt when I was in Manchester. That wasn't Nicola's fault, it was all mine. I guess you don't know what you've got til its gone. Actually, she couldn't really have done anything more to help me. I don't know why I'm writing all this in a blog. Perhaps cos I don't have a pen to write in my journal that seems to have suffered since leaving Melbourne about 3 weeks ago. it could be worse I suppose, i could post a video of me crying over Britney Spears on Youtube. I don't have any mobile signal so I can't phone anyone. Awesome. I got to the hostel and as soon as I walked up the drive every f***er just stared at me. Made me feel slightly uncomfortable. If everyone is enjoying themsleves, why do I want to scoop my eyeballs out with a f***ing teaspoon? Jesus, I hope I meet some nice people soon. I'm not even a christian so I can't talk to God either, Awesome.