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Dan&LJ RTW
"Todie prugrem, eat dha bee quest, an dhen, chekking indhe ferrets"!
Translation: Today's program after eating breakfast will be trekking in the forest.
Our Ha Long Bay tour guide had the full attention of the whole group.
HANOI
The capital city was to be our base for a number of activities in the north of the country that would take us the best part of a week. We were initially excited about our arrival in yet another Asian capital as the other major cities in Vietnam had been terrific. What a shock this place actually turned out to be!
Our guest house was located in the very heart of the 'Old Quarter', a very quaint and traditional labyrinth of tiny streets and shop fronts. Perfect we thought. What we failed to recognise was that it was in fact 6am when we arrived, a time when anywhere looks peaceful. The 'Old Quarter' is in actual fact a place so bursting at the seams that it is simply impossible to explore at any leisure. To paint a clearer picture, imagine a town the size of Burton or Pudsey, put 4.1million people there, give them all a fired up mo-ped and remove all traffic laws.......you get the idea!
We have visited a fair number of big cities in Asia now and Hanoi was amongst the busiest, hottest, most polluted, most hassle-some and plain annoying of them all. All pavement space was taken up by overstocked shop fronts and hawkers, all roads were absolutely stacked with motorcyclists and the odd brave motorist - where were we supposed to go? It became a frustrating few days trying to find our way around and not the lasting impression we wanted from our last stop in this fantastic country.
All was not lost, after a day we headed far north into the hills.
SA PA
The former French hill station in the far north of Vietnam was the perfect tonic to the mayhem of Hanoi. Sa Pa is the main base for people wanting to trek out into the surrounding villages occupied by the ethnic minority groups of the region and this is what we intended to do. On route, the scenery alone was spellbinding and the fact that it was getting cooler and cooler the higher we got, saw lj reaching for the microfleece quicker than you can say Peter Storm® - only available at Millets. It really was cold though!
The trekking we did was great, passing through 3 or 4 different minority villages, being invited into their homes and most of all, being badgered into buying something from them at intervals of 30-40 seconds. The most persistent of them all was the women of the rather amusingly named 'Hmong' tribe (pronounced mong). Obviously we thought it was funny, nobody else seemed to!
The photo's of the trip speak for themselves really. The views were incredible, the air was fresh and Dan got to model the latest range for 'Man at Millets AW06' (pls refer to pics).
Back to HANOI
On our return to the capital it is probably fair to say that we had both reached a low point especially where food was concerned. We were experiencing cravings for western food with the same delirium as an expectant mother. Many times we would wake in the night screaming for mash potatoes, baked beans, Cornish pasties and Jackie's corned beef hash, only to be confronted with a bowl of rice for brekkie instead. It's like giving a starving dog a rubber bone.
The cravings were made worse by the fact that:
a) Hanoi has one of the largest selections of western restaurants in the country and
b) we couldn't afford to eat in any of them.
Instead, we took to sleeping in as late as possible to save money on breakfast in the hope we could afford a cottage pie between us for lunch!
HA LONG BAY
The trip around Ha Long Bay was to be the highlight and finale of our tour around the country. The pictures we'd seen and the tours on offer promised a memorable few days aboard a traditional Chinese junk cruising amongst the picturesque rock formations.
Oh Dear.
Now, it could have been our mood and low ebb at the time, but it appears we booked our tour with 'Crap Tours Incorporated', and were treated to the most arrogant, rude, flippant, uninterested and downright annoying tour guide in the world. We were constantly passed from pillar to post and over the course of 3 days we became the 'add-ons' to 4 different tour groups. One of which was led by the 'clear English speaking guide' previewed at the top of this page. For an entire day we had absolutely no idea what was happening and were extremely disappointed that we didn't 'check' even one 'ferret' as promised.
Initial annoyance gradually became clean cut rage and in the absence of our 'tour guide' who was rarely seen, Dan was forced to take his rage out on a number of inanimate objects and had one particular 'incident' with a deck chair. Those who know of Dan's likeness to his Dad will picture what we mean (buddy stupid thing!!)
Basically, the tour we booked was not the same as the one we went on, but truth will always prevail and after arguing with the travel agent for an hour, we were refunded the massive sum of 6USD - enough for a couple of beers and a steak, result!
Aside from all of this, Ha Long Bay is stunning, peaceful & still as beautiful as it looks in all the pictures. The cruise itself was fine and when we were left alone to take it all in, the surrounding views were priceless. It was just a shame that our Vietnam finale was slightly marred by a broken deckchair, a rubbish travel agent & our pathetic, idiotic, sub-human tour guide (Dan is still bitter).
Back to HANOI again
Another couple of days to battle through the chaos before jetting back to Bangkok for our journey onwards to Malaysia. With our cash windfall we were able to treat ourselves to a night at the theatre and to the traditional Vietnamese art of water puppetry. We entered the auditorium expecting the performance to be more comedic than cultural, but left with tails between our legs and the discovery of Hanoi's one redeeming feature - it was fantastic, funny, entertaining and we finally managed to end our time in Vietnam on a high note.
On reflection, our time in Vietnam has been truly memorable and we wouldn't change a thing about it. The history, the people and the incredible backdrop will be a lasting memory of the trip.
We feel a real sense of achievement having travelled overland through Cambodia and up the entire length of Vietnam on the budget available to us. It's true you learn things about yourself travelling and its fair to say we like what we are beginning to find out.
Next stop, return to Bangkok.
Will update again soon,
love to all, Danny & lj xxx
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