This blog starts with a year-ender account of the annum that passed--2008. It kicks off with my travel to Europe and the detailed narration of the things I experienced and learned and felt. Join me as I unravel the footprints of the year that has brought me many firsts. And later, journey with me to the places I had been, in the Philippines and the World.
a year of grace....
The year 2008 started with exuberant joy and excitement. By January, I was packing my things and getting ready for my first trip beyond Southeast Asia. I was heading for Dublin, Ireland. I was ecstatic! A lot of firsts will be fulfilled. First taste of snow during winter, first savour of a country which was beyond my reach, first exam for the fulfillment of being trained abroad, and first time to being alone in a country I can not call my own.
However, such heavenly feeling faded with the reality of troubles and struggles. I came back with failure stamped in my forehead. And who would think that the people you respected and trusted will eventually stab you in your back? I almost lost my job because of them! Crazy people do exist.
With humility and a generous spirit, I continued my steps and journeyed life with passion and love. It was never easy but with the support and help of my friends and family, life went on. And I did it with zest. Favours were limited and life seemed grace-less. No light in the pathway, no hope in the alley.
Yet, I remembered, when all seemed dim and gloomy, fireflies hovered around, birthing out a little light of hope. The stars shone at its best, and the moon, beamed with magnificent beauty. My world was still and silent and it was in such serenity that I saw all of my surroundings with clarity. The friends I can trust, the people I can lean on, and the love of my family; they were fireflies and stars and moon. And I saw their greatest worth as they continue to light my world.
I thought that was all there was. I again flew to Europe during late summer and early autumn. Yes, I was excited but the apprehensions were far more nerve-wracking. Apprehensive of my finances, my loans and debts and the reality that can set in after a leave-without-pay vacation for my exam. Three long months which brought havoc and chaos in my life. After coming back from the country I want to live in, loads of payables piled up. With the help of some people, a little ease was felt. However, I was detached from my work without notice. When I came back, I have no work to go to. Not only that, having no leave credits made matters worst. The people that brought such dilemma were undaunted and pathetic. They said a lot of things and promises were uttered and sympathy was expressed, over-actingly! Blah blah was all I could express.
During such times, I almost lost my self. I felt hatred and detestation were slowly eating me up. Revenge was trying to creep through and within me. And all I did was shed a few tears. I was a different man all along during those trying moments. Love and contentment and gratefulness were overwhelmingly abundant. They washed up hatred and revenge in my system. And I really thought I was no human at all. It could never be me, so I said. But my heart and my soul was one with what is good.
Today, all these recounts put a smile on my face. They joy of blessings and the growth in trials are what life is all about. One's true worth can be measured not in good times but during the hardest moments of one's life. Problems sculpt the curves in us and failures mold us into becoming who we really are—a jewel in God's eyes and in the eyes of our loved ones. I was not always a good and a godly man during the year. I had my own share of tantrums and "bratty-ness"; yet, this year is worth of giving thanks to our Creator, Lover and Friend.
Another year will come. Yet, all I know is this: the year 2008 is a year-long of unmerited favor…a year full of grace.