Nick and Sarah Go To Amsterdam

So there's something I should mention about the Berlin Hostel before I get to the rest of the day. It was, without doubt, the noisiest set of mattresses ever created. Seriously, it was like a factory whose sole purpose was to create squeaks and creaks. Every time someone even remotely shifted their weight in their sleep you'd get to hear a massive "CREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK" and when you added it to the incredibly loud German gentleman who was yelling for half the night, it didn't really have all the elements for a good night's sleep. Strangely enough though, the creaky springs meant that the base of the bed was hard as a rock and (when I actually got a few glimpses of sleep) I slept deeper than I had in weeks.

After we got to the Netherlands we booked into our hostel and immediately went to do the local walking tour. Here we saw the red light district, the canals and got a lecture on the decriminalization of marijuana. The tour really didn't have too many major points so there's not a lot to put in this blog. In fact, you'll find that Amsterdam doesn't have a whole heap to write about so this is going to be a short blog. And yeah, yeah I know what you're thinking but it's the truth.

One interesting thing is that they have anti-urination guards on the corners of some buildings. These are triangle metal sheets with ridges on them whose sole purpose is that when drunks go up to the corner and pee, they just end up deflecting it mostly back onto their own pants. A few of them are also allegedly connected to a light current, but after a creative soul hooked one up to the mains and either severely injured or killed a man (can't remember which), they are no longer allowed. But there's a lot of things that "aren't allowed" in Amsterdam and that never stops anyone.

After the tour Sarah and I had a quick drink with the tour guide and then went on to do some shopping. Here's a unique situation. They all shut at precisely 6pm. I'm not talking about like at home when shops start pulling their doors shut at 5:45 and then they serve the rest of the people in the store until 6:20 and then they're closed. No, at 6pm they close the shutters and that's it. If you're still in the store they tell you to get the hell out because it's after 6pm and they're sure as s*** not gonna serve you. Eerily they all close their shutters at exactly the same time with military precision…

And that's it for the first day in Amsterdam. I mean, we went and got dinner then to the bar downstairs at the hostel for a few drinks, but then it was to bed for our last day in Amsterdam before heading back to London.

Mum, Dad and anyone with a sensitive disposition can stop reading now coz that's the whole story. Really. Yibbidah yibbidah, that's all folks.

For the rest of you, there's not too much to say except that after drinks with the guide and before dinner I went to a coffee shop and picked up a pre-rolled for the price of 3.50 Euro. To stay with the European references; it got me blitzed out of my krieg. Kinda weird walking through the street with a joint in your pocket knowing that it's totally ok.

Fun Fact: Everyone in the Netherlands sounds like the Swedish Chef. Everyone. You have no idea how hard it is to take anyone seriously when they sound like they're about to end every sentence with "Burdy hurdy wurdy in der hurdy gurdy an de boom boom!"