7.5.2008

Time-less and space-less

So many things happen in a day that by the time I've sat in front of the computer I lose count of everything I wanted to write. As John stretches our bodies and emotions, swami is definately stretching our minds.

All started with a good practise this morning. I realised that for years I had completely misunderstood astanga yoga, the true system, the vinyasa, the counts and the reason behind it. As John has already challenged us to learn the correct method and "experiement and experience it in our bodies as scientists" my practise has moments of realization, and moments of complete utter confusion. During the drop backs with John as I he puts it "I was falling like an angel with free wings" there was a beautiful pop in my middle back, something that had been stuck for some time. Although I managed to get through the practise, the minute I took rest in the arms of mather earth I let the tears go wild. I had no idea, as it was a cell memory being released. I laid there and cried, and I think Jamie noticed me as he had been observing the class, and shared my tears with me!

Then I went in the hot tub for the first time. Isnt it amazing that we sometimes starve our body and mind from great experiences in all busy-ness we create, or judgements we make. I had been here for 2 weeks and always said "i'll get in that tomorrow" and today I enjoyed those strong jets massaging my body that it will become a regular event!

Practise with john revealed so many more bad habits I had had, so as the penny drops everyday I am absolutely finding myself indulge in his knowlegde. As he says "the secret is the sharing of the secret". He doesnt hold back at all, it simply pours out of him. And he provides such a protected environment for us to play and learn at the same time. It is full on but at the same time we lose concept of time all together.

And then I went for a walk to the tree at lunch time and watched a hawk spread its wings, so free, flying around. Just beautiful!

Swami has answered my questions indirectly as well. She really is slicing through the mind, and how we hold on to all the bad things in our "filing cabinet" which re-creates all those bad memories, sufferings. She suggested a few ways of clearing them once we're aware, exhale it out, write it on paper and bury it or burn it, or simply give it to a tree as trees are good at getting rid of negative energy. Today's session was all about the absolute truth, that we are one, we are the source, we are the creators and how every being is connected...

It is reflected in john's teachings as well. We're doing 108 sun salutaions on sunday. And we will move as one breath, one mind, one consiousness...

I'm enjoying everything about this place, all the learning, all the suffering. Everything comes together...and it is only day3!