28.2.2008

Gratitude

A lot of people I have met this year are envious of my time out, the freedom I have created this year, with all its possibilities. They refer to it as their dream one day. And today I thought more about how that manifested itself, who I owe this to, what coincidences in my life to get here. At this moment we are all residual outcomes of what we thought and acted on, so for my journey to begin this year the source also goes back a very long time, when I met an inspirational man in December 2005, a week with John Scott in Penzance.

Even how I got to him was pure luck perhaps. It was during my British Wheel of Yoga teacher training that I had a dear friend Janet who was practising yoga with one of John's trainee teachers in London and they had planned for a group of 8 to visit John. I was still oblivious to Astanga world and who was who, but wanted to experience fun time, with fun people doing fun activity. Unfortunately those 8 places were already taken. It was only a few weeks before the trip that someone decided not to go and I gave her a cheque for her booking to take her place.

I had a vedic astrology reading in Goa in December 2007 and was given exact dates, significant dates in my past that brought me here. And one was that December 2005.

At the time I didn't realise what I had launched into. John was very kind, spoke the same language as I, very knowledgeable and taught me not to have expectations from that week of retreat with him. I actually got into padmasana for the first time during that trip, was offered my current job as I had the interview a few days before I left London and was having a great time with all the people cooking at the cottage and having daily cream teas at cafes. I definitely got my money's worth I thought.

So that was the beginning of a teacher-student relationships, as John would grow I would grow with him. Some might call it stalking, some might call it dedication but I followed him everywhere, did as many workshops as I could do with him and continued to learn.

Then there came January 2007 when I returned from Lino's workshop in India, questioning what I was doing in my life, unhappy with the environment, the stress and knowing that I had to change something. A week intensive workshop with John channelled my energy in the right direction. He was in a funny place himself. He had been exploring buddism, various meditations, he had been reading and learning about quantum physics, the power of the mind, the reality we create…and so much more. It was a fun workshop, imagining sandy beach in the shala and doing cartwheels, visualising jump backs and jump throughs and actually doing them, doing tonglen meditation clearing suffering from our loved ones.

John was buzzing with energy as usual, stories followed on and advice he gave to those seeking answers. I think one was from a lady who had a child but wanted to visit Mysore. John told her just do it, there was no barrier but what she created herself. It was at that moment that I thought about taking a year out, doing yoga, travelling, meeting people and healing whatever that didn't feel right in my body.

On the last day of his workshop I remember something he said very clearly; he came in the studio and asked us "how far do you want the rabbit to go down the hole?" and someone shouted "all the way"…Shouldn't we be doing the same, go down the rabbit hole and explore?

"Thoughts become things". I let my imagination run wild for a while, daydreaming what I would do, sit with a calendar for hours and draw tens of different possibilities and itinaries. I knew that it had India and New Zealand in it. Then I added a stopover in Australia to visit Liz also. And the more daydreamed and saw myself in those possibilities the more real it became. A few months later I had applied for a sabbatical at my work, advertised to rent my room and booked my flights.

Some of the plan has changed since I left home in October 2007, but I knew that the universe had bigger plans, and that I had to take turns but my goal remains the same. No expectations, go with the flow, meet people, practice yoga and allow the changed to take place.

Gratitude to John and his teachers in life who have helped him become who he is.