Walking back from breakfast, having paid our fish dinner debts from the night before, we were approached by a young man on a scooter. After enquiring a bit about where we were staying and for how long, he gave us a folded postcard each. "Open it up - you might have won a prize!" he said excitedly hopping around. Clive was unlucky, but imagine my surprise when mine revealed that I had won A Top Prize. "Oh Madam, that is wonderful," he cried. "You just need to come to a hotel with me and you can claim your prize. And I will get 100 points. Oh Madam, I am so happy!" Hmm, we thought, what are they trying to sell? But we decided that as we weren't doing anything else it might be a bit of a laugh - and of course, I had won A Top Prize. "It will only take sixty minutes..." the young man said.

He collected us later at our hotel and we drove to Cavellosim, a village about 10kms from Colva. As we left the hotel a passing taxi driver muttered "Timeshare - be careful!" Our journey, punctuated by whispered comments about timeshare scams, snowballs and hell, duly took us to The Royal Goan Resort of Haathi Mahal and we were escorted to meet a rather standoffish woman who asked us some questions - presumably to make sure we qualified for whatever they were selling. Our Scooter Boy had been most nervous about what we'd say, because it appeared that on the basis of the questions we'd be turfed out on our ear if we answered entirely truthfully! They were looking for couples who would be in Goa for three weeks, and were paying 1,000 Rs or more for their accommodation - we of course only qualified on the first count, but Scooter Boy pleaded with us to stretch the truth a little, which we agreed. What's a 100 rupees and a week between friends after all?

We seemed to pass muster and were introduced to Max, a charming and voluble chap who showed us around the grounds and plied us with orange juice. Eventually he led us up to the nerve centre of the operation - a room filled with multiple Maxes and couples sitting at tables, earnestly looking at brochures and pieces of paper with pictures and figures drawn on them in black felt pen. There was a buzz in the air as the salesmen homed in for the kill. Max proceeded to tell us about the scheme, which turned out to be a sort of holiday club, similar to timeshare but with more flexibility. He drew us pictures, made calculations, showed us brochures while Clive did his normal comedy act asking obscure questions, but never got to the bottom line. "How much is it then?" we asked, but Max skillfully dodged the question by offering to show us the apartments. We trotted off after him like a couple of sheep, dutifully admiring the table tennis tables, sauna, squash courts, pool, water slide and finally the apartment itself.

It turned out to be very pleasant with all mod cons. By the pool was a group of Northerners (I have to say their combined weight would have tipped the scales at a tonne at least!). We decided to ask them first hand what they thought of the scheme. "Ee, eck as like, it's right grand, love," said one. "Ooh, yes, we 'ave a luvverly time here, don't we Fred?" "Aye chook, it's right fabulous." Etcetera, etcetera. Clive looked nervously at me as it he was wondering if we'd get that large in later life. "Come," said Max and off we went again to the nerve centre which was by now empty and not buzzing. Presumably all the couples had purchased their weeks and were off celebrating. "So, Max, what about our prizes then?" "Yes, yes, very soon Sir," said Max, sliding into his seat. "I will just get my Manager to talk to you." We still hadn't heard the price.

Perhaps the manager was now required as we were taking longer than most to make a decision. We were certainly asking a LOT of questions. Anyway, having spent the best part of five hours there, (and thought about our future European travel plans) we decided to buy a Holiday Week. This is not a timeshare - it's entirely flexible in terms of when and where we decide to go and we can purchase bonus weeks at very good rates, and we've bought membeship for a minimum of 25 years. Ideal for travelling around Europe we thought. "And what about the prize?" we asked for the fifth time. Guess what? It turned out to be two weeks at a Royal Resort in Goa, Thailand or Bali! We've actually ended up with five "free" weeks of holidays...as if we haven't had enough already. We think we've got a good deal and we don't think we've been conned - only time will tell. What was that about snowballs and hell?